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Author Topic: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?  (Read 27455 times)

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Katana_Geldar

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Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« on: December 30, 2015, 05:18:14 PM »
I read this article and it got me thinking about the menus at weddings. While it is a day for the couple (somehow mostly the bride) and they are paying for it, how much do you expect guests to go along with your own lifestyle choices? Particularly if you know that most of them, including close friends and family, don't share your views on food etc.

Because as much as I think that a couple decides what to do with their wedding, I still think it's part of being hosts to feed your guests with something they will mostly eat. This is of course if a meal is on offer, some weddings don't have them. And if most of the guests don't eat the food, then your wedding will be remembered as where most of the guests went hungry. Or ordered pizza in the parking lot (yes, that did happen!!!).

http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/health/diet/wellness-blogger-jessica-sepel-has-extremely-nutritious-nuptials/news-story/a0e1416b1e117709abc16d5106dc48a9

What do you think? I'm a bit torn on this because as much as I think a couple should determine what goes on at their wedding, it seems terribly selfish to serve a meal if you KNOW most of the guests won't eat it.

HannahGrace

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #1 on: December 30, 2015, 05:25:38 PM »
I don't see what's controversial about grilled fish and various veggies? Sounds like a lovely meal to me.

gollymolly2

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #2 on: December 30, 2015, 05:27:05 PM »
Eh, any meal basically reflects the hosts' "lifestyle choices." I think as long as the hosts provide food that is adequate for the setting (e.g., don't serve snacks during a meal time) and that the hosts believe the guests will be able to eat (e.g., don't do an all-meat buffet if most of your attendees are vegetarian), then it's fine.

The hosts don't have to provide each guest with their ideal meal. If some of the guests at the wedding described in this article don't like fish, papaya salad, roasted vegetables, and fruit (which is what was served) ... So what? They can eat something else before/after the wedding.

Zizi-K

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #3 on: December 30, 2015, 05:28:51 PM »
Same here. It sounds like a tasty meal -- not a heavy or indulgent one, which I realize some people have come to expect at weddings. But I would also expect their guests to largely be of a similar mindset, so given that the guests know the couple I doubt anyone was surprised.

Cali.in.UK

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #4 on: December 30, 2015, 05:43:04 PM »
I don't think this menu was that bad. I was expecting only raw-food or bugs or something worse. I know that people tend to complain when there is no alcohol at a wedding but if the couple are health-food bloggers then it is not surprising that their menu would reflect that.

rose red

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #5 on: December 30, 2015, 06:17:57 PM »
Her menus sound good to me and I don't find anything controversial about it. Healthy yes. Controversial no.

Reading the topic title, I too was expecting weirdness like....I don't know....an oxygen bar or something like that. What's wrong with fish, veggies, muffins, and fruit? I eat those often. If they didn't draw attention to their message, you'd think it's just a normal meal, especially since it looks like a beach/seaside wedding.
« Last Edit: December 30, 2015, 06:20:26 PM by rose red »

EllenS

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #6 on: December 30, 2015, 06:25:23 PM »
The menu sounds kind of bland but not offensive. But to the principle behind the question - if it really were a question of serving things you knew lots of the guests would not eat - if, for example, half the family kept Kosher and you wrapped everything in bacon, or if a significant number of the older relatives are heart patients and everything was super-salty, or if you were serving creatures that many of your guests do not recognize as food, or if you know there are vegetarians and there are no veg. options, etc - well then that's just poor hosting.

A good host makes sure that the guests can eat things that won't make them sick or violate their moral beliefs. Beyond that, if it's just a question of taste, I don't think a slightly eccentric menu is rude.

kherbert05

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #7 on: December 30, 2015, 06:39:24 PM »
I agree with the others that the menu was no more rude than my cousins having BBQ at their wedding. A bit different than the norm for my family, but fit the couple and the location. 
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MrsJWine

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #8 on: December 30, 2015, 07:00:19 PM »
Simply having a reception that follows your own food preferences isn't rude. But I think it's important to have options if you're serving something like fish. A lot of people can't stand fish; I can't even think about eating it without gagging, and most people I know who don't like fish really, really hate it to a similar degree. I would smile and eat my vegetables (and probably my husband's, too), but be absolutely starving by the end of that reception. It's hard to tell from the article, though, if the only filling/protein-rich food was fish, or that was just one example of a dish they had at the reception.


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Dazi

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #9 on: December 30, 2015, 07:08:17 PM »
Personally, I'd be thrilled to be invited to that wedding reception. There's food that I can actually eat and I love fish. I thought it was going to be something really off the wall.

My only thought was that they needed one or two alternate protein dishes. First, a lot of people hate the smell/taste of fish. Second, fish is an absurdly common food allergy.
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Luci

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #10 on: December 30, 2015, 07:23:50 PM »
We went to a wedding that was kosher vegetarian . It was really good with cheese and herbs but the major complaint was the tiny portions. We didnt expect farmer's or lumberman's meal, but we did expect to have enough energy for dancing. There was a Burger King bag on the table in the lounge.

That was rude, we thought. The choice of food was not.

I do agree with the posters who said people who hate fish really hate it, and allergies to fish are really common. In that respect, I do think it was rude not to have another protein offering. Our DD would prefer a vegetarian meal to pescatarian.

blue2000

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #11 on: December 30, 2015, 08:54:18 PM »
I don't have a problem with her wedding menu, even if I wouldn't personally eat it. But from the sounds of it, this was a four-day destination wedding and she served similar things for all the meals.
Quote
prior to the nuptials she treated ladies to a heath spa and a raw vegan meal for lunch.

Quote
Guests were served sugar-free bliss balls and banana-date-walnut muffins from her recipe book, The Healthy Life, for breakfast while away for the four days.

They were also served steamed veggies for dinner, fresh fruit for dessert and had access to a vitamin juice station.

I hope she warned people, and had alternative restaurants they could go to instead. Contrary to her beliefs on "clean eating" making her guests feel their best, sudden radical changes in diet can actually make you feel pretty lousy until your body gets used to them.
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EllenS

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #12 on: December 30, 2015, 08:58:36 PM »
I don't have a problem with her wedding menu, even if I wouldn't personally eat it. But from the sounds of it, this was a four-day destination wedding and she served similar things for all the meals.
Quote
prior to the nuptials she treated ladies to a heath spa and a raw vegan meal for lunch.

Quote
Guests were served sugar-free bliss balls and banana-date-walnut muffins from her recipe book, The Healthy Life, for breakfast while away for the four days.

They were also served steamed veggies for dinner, fresh fruit for dessert and had access to a vitamin juice station.

I hope she warned people, and had alternative restaurants they could go to instead. Contrary to her beliefs on "clean eating" making her guests feel their best, sudden radical changes in diet can actually make you feel pretty lousy until your body gets used to them.

Well, I should hope any multi-day celebration is not a "captive audience" situation where the guests have no option to move about freely, take their meals where they like, etc. Anyone can put up with one meal that is not to their taste. But for a host to try to dictate what their guests can and can't eat for four days? That would be ludicrously controlling. I didn't get the sense that was going on here. I hope not.

mmswm

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #13 on: December 30, 2015, 09:26:19 PM »
I'd have probably come up with an excuse to leave as soon as I reasonably could over the fish thing, assuming there wasn't another protein option.  Just the smell is enough to make me feel ill, but trying to fill up on fruit and muffins (and all that fruit sugar!), with no satiating protein available would have been more than my stomach could handle.  I agree with the others about how fish is a very divisive food.  Many people who hate it are like me, and so many others have allergies. 

Additionally, what if any of her guests were diabetics with fish allergies/aversions?  They'd have been carted off in a diabetic coma.  That's certainly not healthy.

In short, the menu itself isn't too bad at first glance, but it wasn't well thought out and if there weren't additional protein options, then she wasn't being a very good host.
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Yvaine

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Re: Controversial food choices, is it worth it?
« Reply #14 on: December 30, 2015, 09:55:07 PM »
I think the main rudeness to this would be if she preached to her guests about why she chose these foods and how they were superior to whatever they would normally eat. If she didn't do that, I think it's fine.

I would agree though that a sudden shift in eating habits, especially if this went on for several days, might not have everyone feeling their best as she hoped; a lot of health food is high-fiber, for example, and she could have people spending much more time in the portajohn than she expected!  ;D


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