This is the dress I ended up purchasing:
https://www.kiyonna.com/plus-size-clothing/12150901?v=19823&gclid=EAIaIQobChMI_sz5_NDF1gIVRZR-Ch0Isgz9EAQYASABEgJv_vD_BwEI originally bought it in the "pinot noir" color but then found out that the bridesmaids are wearing that color, so I returned it and bought the blue. It's not that there's been an edict that guests can't wear anything in the burgundy/wine family, but my sister, the mother of the bride, has a highly developed ability to take offense at the slightest thing, so I thought, "Why borrow trouble?" In any event, the dress fits really well, and it's not too short, like 99% of what's available today. I plan to wear it to another wedding in November that we just got invited to (coworker of DH), and it will be making appearances at a couple of December holiday events. So, I will be getting my money's worth out of it, for sure!
I also found a different pair of shoes that I liked (in black):
https://www.dsw.com/en/us/product/unisa-claudi-pump/399178?activeColor=503I have a black shawl to carry with me, as well.