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  • July 20, 2017, 02:05:40 PM

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Author Topic: Early guests  (Read 605 times)

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trichele21

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Early guests
« on: July 17, 2017, 12:29:46 AM »
Sweet lord of mercy on a Friday night!! When will people understand that it is JUST AS RUDE to show up early as it is to show up late to an event?!?

I put together a dinner party this past weekend and had finished racing around my house like a crazy person doing last minute prep and had just stepped out of the shower when - DING DONG!!

Forty-five minutes early!!  45!! The worst part? They live two doors down from us!!

I heard my husband answer the door while I was putting on makeup and blow drying my hair and I tried soooo hard to be gracious but my facial expressions do not lie. The neighbor even said "I hope we aren't too early". Meanwhile I'm trying to finish last minute prep and have to try to entertain them at the same time.

Please remember this when attending your next event! Showing up early puts undue stress on what is probably an already stressed out hostess.

JadeAngel

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #1 on: July 17, 2017, 12:49:51 AM »
I have a firm philosophy that if you show up during prep time for a party you'll be set to work because there are a multitude of jobs that need to be done right now and we've no time to be sitting around entertaining you. So grab a stack of plates and start setting the table, put out the chairs, fill the esky with ice and move that table from the living room to the back deck and if you don't like it then come back at the start time listed on your invitation.

I did have a friend who was mightily surprised to step out of her bathroom after a shower to find an early arriving guest sitting in her living room. Apparently when there was no response to his persistent knocking he got through her fence into her back yard and when he found the back door was unlocked decided to walk right in and make himself comfortable. As I recall she sent him home with a flea in his ear and firm instructions not to come back until the party started.

Runningstar

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #2 on: July 17, 2017, 06:27:33 AM »
Yes!  This is the worst!  A few years ago I got the time wrong and showed up an hour early to a party.  It was obvious that the hostess wasn't ready and we tried to leave so that we could come back later.   I still cringe.  This was an annual party that always started at 7:30, so when we got the invitation I just wrote it down as "annual party at Sheilas" not noticing the 8:30 start. 


Psychopoesie

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #3 on: July 17, 2017, 06:58:57 AM »
Yes!  This is the worst!  A few years ago I got the time wrong and showed up an hour early to a party.  It was obvious that the hostess wasn't ready and we tried to leave so that we could come back later.   I still cringe.  This was an annual party that always started at 7:30, so when we got the invitation I just wrote it down as "annual party at Sheilas" not noticing the 8:30 start. 



Did the same thing, only it was a new bookclub. So embarrassed and uncomfortable. The host wasn't the person I knew. Did offer to come back later - wish she'd said yes. So awkward.

Sakuko

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #4 on: July 17, 2017, 07:52:39 AM »
If they live 2 houses down, why couldn't you just say, "Oh, you must have confused the time. We'll be ready for you at 9h, see you then." or some variation thereof? Would that be impolite?

Because that happened to some friends before, mistaking the time and showing up an hour early to a party. They just went home again. There was some friendly ribbing, but it happens and no one ended up being frustrated or angry.

bloo

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #5 on: July 17, 2017, 07:56:24 AM »
If they live 2 houses down, why couldn't you just say, "Oh, you must have confused the time. We'll be ready for you at 9h, see you then." or some variation thereof? Would that be impolite?

Because that happened to some friends before, mistaking the time and showing up an hour early to a party. They just went home again. There was some friendly ribbing, but it happens and no one ended up being frustrated or angry.

Yeah, I might have changed back into my bathrobe and greeted them with, "oh hey guys! Yeah party starts at x, I'm not ready for guests obviously, haha, anyhoo come back at x, k?" As I ushered them out the door.

VorFemme

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #6 on: July 17, 2017, 10:16:45 AM »
I showed up an hour early to a group's luncheon once (short form - they sent an email to everyone else on the board to let them know about the change in starting time - they didn't send one to me, I know because I checked when I got home) - but the hostess needed an extra set of hands due to something (it's been twelve years - but she had just gotten back from a run to the store for extra supplies of some kind) - so I was getting the ice into ice chests (I'm 5' 8" and she was 5' 2" - she couldn't handle the larger bags of ice by herself), tossing a salad after assembling it from bags, and putting extra silverware out in the holders for the buffet as it came out of the dishwasher while she mixed up a chicken & spaghetti casserole to heat in the oven.

Everything was ready on time - which she told me & several other people would not have been the case if she'd been by herself.

There was a touch of irony - I was the Membership person of the board, in charge of making sure that the contact information was up to date.  Someone left my email address off the group mailing - so I did not get the email that otherwise went to everyone else on the Board.  I wondered about it briefly - but decided to ascribe it to accident rather than malice.  Especially since I'd proven useful when I showed up "on time" according to the information that I had, under the circumstances 8-D
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I explain?

TootsNYC

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #7 on: July 17, 2017, 10:20:31 AM »
I showed up an entire WEEK early once.


EllenS

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #8 on: July 17, 2017, 01:05:00 PM »
I have a firm philosophy that if you show up during prep time for a party you'll be set to work because there are a multitude of jobs that need to be done right now and we've no time to be sitting around entertaining you. So grab a stack of plates and start setting the table, put out the chairs, fill the esky with ice and move that table from the living room to the back deck and if you don't like it then come back at the start time listed on your invitation.

I did have a friend who was mightily surprised to step out of her bathroom after a shower to find an early arriving guest sitting in her living room. Apparently when there was no response to his persistent knocking he got through her fence into her back yard and when he found the back door was unlocked decided to walk right in and make himself comfortable. As I recall she sent him home with a flea in his ear and firm instructions not to come back until the party started.

She's nicer than me. Unless we were absolute besties, I'd have kicked him out and told him not to come back. That is seriously not okay.

Outdoor Girl

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #9 on: July 17, 2017, 01:39:44 PM »
With someone who lives two doors down, I think I'd say, 'Well, you can either do X task to help me get ready or you can go back home and come back at Y time', with a smile.
After cleaning out my Dad's house, I have this advice:  If you haven't used it in a year, throw it out!!!!.
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pattycake

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #10 on: July 17, 2017, 01:53:33 PM »
I showed up an entire WEEK early once.

Did you sleep over until it started?

 >:D

TootsNYC

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #11 on: July 17, 2017, 07:29:06 PM »
I showed up an entire WEEK early once.

Did you sleep over until it started?

 >:D

yep! And of course I helped with things while I was waiting.
 ;)

(No, we all laughed, and I went home, family in tow, and came back the next week)

Huh

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #12 on: Today at 12:38:18 PM »
My DH, bless his heart, is always worried about being late to events. He is obsessed that traffic will be bad. So we end up being 30 minutes early alot, unless I put my foot down. The last time we were 25 minutes early for a party, we sat in our car in the driveway (couple lived in middle of nowhere, so literally nowhere to go for miles) until we noticed they kept looking out at us, probably wondering just what we were doing. We went in and I helped with food prep, which I like doing, but I was ready to smack him, LOL.

VorFemme

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Re: Early guests
« Reply #13 on: Today at 12:51:54 PM »
I would almost rather turn up fifteen minutes or so early than what VorGuy does - which is that he'll tell me that "we'll leave in five minutes" as he steps into the shower...

We have never left in just five minutes after he steps into the shower.  I am not holding out hope that we will ever leave in just five minutes from the time he steps into a shower - even if he left his waterproof watch on the ledge and is going into the shower fully dressed to grab it.

If we are only five minutes late to dinner reservations or a party, I count it as progress...but apparently only five minutes late gives him the idea that next time, he can leave a little later.

When he was leaving for work, he was better about leaving "on time" or a little earlier - but since he retired, I don't think that we've been early for anything.
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I explain?