Author Topic: "Sorry about your dead baby. Can I have your stuff?" - Babyshower0203-03  (Read 2671 times)

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VorFemme

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Re: "Sorry about your dead baby. Can I have your stuff?" - Babyshower0203-03
« Reply #15 on: November 25, 2014, 03:23:48 PM »
You know, I can see a really good friend, in that situation, asking if the bereaved parents would like their friends to clear out the nursery before they got home. For some people that would be a blessing; others would want to do that themselves. But not to take the nursery fittings home with them--just so the parents wouldn't have to come home and see them, and have to go through the process of taking the nursery apart.

But to ask for them? While the mother is still in the hospital? There are no words.

Well, there are.  We just can't say them here.    >:D

Well, Evil & Snarky agree that there are words, and that they aren't polite words.  But calling someone a greedy heartless conniving self-centered woman of questionable parentage can be said in public and is the closest in meaning to the shorter, pithier terms that someone might say in the heat of the moment.

They also think that the cut direct would have been completely correct and that "Barbara" would have been overlooked in all contact with Ben, in the sense that she might have been there, but there would have been no more social interaction with her than one might politely give to a stranger who walked in behind him.  Which probably would not have been very nice, but when present with the choice between the CD and bludgeoning someone with a cast iron frying pan, well, the CD is less likely to get you arrested and a crime scene clean up crew required. 

But they never ran into someone quite that oblivious - so have never had to apply that decision in real life.  They are aware that sometimes it is harder to make a polite decision in a split second...especially in the kitchen with a cast iron skillet close at hand.
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I say more?

ClaireC79

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Re: "Sorry about your dead baby. Can I have your stuff?" - Babyshower0203-03
« Reply #16 on: November 27, 2014, 09:34:13 AM »
That is just awful.  Without the rudeness I've potentially been in that situation.  My nephew was stillborn at 38 weeks 22 days before my youngest son was born.

I didn't ask for any of his things (tbh I'm not sure what they have done with them they haven't had another baby since, I know they left the nursery as it was for several months and just shut the door, but it is the bereaved parents decision to make) they did give me some nappies and I felt bad enough about accepting them - but also didn't want to hurt them further by refusing them.

Piratelvr1121

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Re: "Sorry about your dead baby. Can I have your stuff?" - Babyshower0203-03
« Reply #17 on: November 27, 2014, 09:42:25 AM »
Wow. That is just hideous. If Linda had clocked her with the nearest blunt object, I'd have helped hide the body.

I'm reminded of a parody of the Frozen song "Do you wanna build a snowman?"   The parody being "Will you help me hide a body?"
Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe, no less than the trees and the stars.  You have a right to be here. Be cheerful, strive to be happy. -Desiderata

Otterpop

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Re: "Sorry about your dead baby. Can I have your stuff?" - Babyshower0203-03
« Reply #18 on: December 08, 2014, 10:01:10 AM »
That's the worst etiquette I've ever heard on this forum.  Barbara was breathtakingly selfish and couldn't see beyond her own nose.  Having no more friends in that group was inevitable.  I'll bet she wears thin on all new friendships too, and can't figure out what happened.

(In a similar vein my mom's well-off "BF" asked her for a loan after my dad died.  She figured my mom got a life insurance payout...In reality mom was left 30K in debt to the hospital, raising a child on her own, and there was NO life insurance.  That was the last time she ever saw BF).
 
Thanks for the update.  Glad to hear Linda and Joe had more children and put to use all the shower gift that were given to THEM.
« Last Edit: December 08, 2014, 10:10:19 AM by Otterpop »