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  • November 20, 2017, 08:50:11 PM

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Author Topic: Non-traditional .. everything!  (Read 1452 times)

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gellchom

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Re: Non-traditional .. everything!
« Reply #15 on: September 19, 2017, 05:09:07 PM »
Congratulations! I am not a fan of your plan, based on how I understand it, though.

If I am understanding this correctly, your plan is:

1. somewhat inclusive "rehearsal dinner" on day one for the bridal party and out of town guests
2. small wedding on day two - it is not clear to me whether the out of town guests are invited?
3. larger reception on day three

It looks like you are expecting some people to devote portions of three days - over the course of three days - to your wedding, which to me is really too much. I wouldn't do a rehearsal dinner at all. I would simply spend time with out of town guests at the reception on day three (which would then be day two) rather than expect them to be out of town for three days plus travel time. Why would they come in two days before the reception just for a rehearsal dinner, and then have nothing to do for an entire day because they are not invited to the actual wedding, and then celebrate again the next day?

As a guest I would find the timeline odd.

I too would find it odd not to just have the reception the same day as the wedding, even if not everyone was invited to the ceremony.

I wouldn't find the three day plan a problem, though, if the people invited to the rehearsal dinner are not invited to the ceremony, unless there is some religious reason that it is limited to certain people or something like that, other than just preference.

As a general matter, I don't see a problem with three events in three days at all; no one is required to attend everything if they feel it's too much.  It's quite typical here -- and in fact can be even more, especially if it's a holiday weekend.  For my daughter's wedding, which was on Sunday evening of a three-day weekend, we had people here Thursday night through Monday.  Anyone from out of town (we had no in-town family) who was there those days was included in everything we did, although other than very close family  (around 20 people) they came Friday or even Saturday and left Monday morning.  There were only large "invitation events" Friday, Saturday, and Sunday -- the rest were informal things, but we did include all out of town guests in whatever we did (casual restaurant supper, minor league baseball game, etc.), and we treated.

I think it makes a difference if you are talking about people coming in from out of town, whom you feel like you're hosting and went to a lot of trouble and expense to be there for your wedding, vs. local people (perhaps other than close family and closest friends) who have other things they have to do that weekend. 

TaurusGirl

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Re: Non-traditional .. everything!
« Reply #16 on: September 19, 2017, 09:02:27 PM »
Thank you for the feedback! We still have ages to plan but I want to get all my ducks in a row early.
To clarify a few things: the ceremony is in our back yard, which is the size of a postage stamp. The "reception" is at a rec centre we're renting, that has multiple bathrooms, indoor/outdoor seating, a dining hall, two kitchens, and play areas for the kids.
We are doing two separate days largely because we want to be able to enjoy ourselves, and doing everything in one day would not work for us. We are also doing tattoos for wedding rings (for many reasons) and want to have them the same day as the vows.
Another reason for the multiple days is to accommodate a few people - some out-of-towners can make it the day before the ceremony, but not after. Some family aren't able to take time off work, so we're doing the reception on a weekend. That kind of thing.
I'm sure I'll be clogging up these boards as we get closer!

guihong

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Re: Non-traditional .. everything!
« Reply #17 on: September 20, 2017, 03:45:08 PM »
I think it would be simpler to have both ceremony and reception at the community hall, on the same day.



Luci

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Re: Non-traditional .. everything!
« Reply #18 on: September 20, 2017, 05:06:20 PM »
I think it would be simpler to have both ceremony and reception at the community hall, on the same day.

She said they were getting tattoos for rings, which I think is bad idea for several reasons, but I'm sure it is a thought out decision.

I'm going to mention something you didn't ask about. DGD sent her invitations with the only RSVP suggestion through their website. Not everyone she invited is on the internet. Three others are but are not quite savvy enough to navigate the site. I had to do it for some of them. I should say to not send response envelopes as it's such a waste of money these days with so few actually used,  but a phone number to respond as an alternative would be nice. Yippee! Voice mail!

Again, most happiness?