Trying to Undermine My Professionalism

[girlmusic]

I need some advice here....

I work for a small division of a large company. My physical office consists of two separate departments. My department is me (Team Lead) and three workers - our boss works in a different physical location. The other department consists of Head of Division (basically lateral to my boss), Director, Team Manager, Team Leads (6) and workers (20).

One of my workers, A, used to be the receptionist but graduated college and subsequently was moved to my group after I lobbied for her for several months. Head of Division had to fire the receptionist, B, that replaced A. He asked me and my team to help out until he could hire a new receptionist. I expressed to him my concern that all the repsonsibilities would fall on A because she knows how to do them. He assured me that this would not happen.

One of the nice things the company does is provide lunch for all the employees once a week. It is the responsibility of the receptionist to pass around menus, place the order and organize the food once it comes.

The next week after B left, Director went straight to A, bypassing me, and told her it was her responsibility to take care of lunch from now on. Director is not A's boss, or even in the same department - he should have asked me or my boss first. A was not happy about this and asked me to find another solution. We were both peeved that Director didn't ask, but rather told. I spoke with Team Manager, who used to take on this responsibility, and asked her if she would mind splitting the responsibility with A, switching off weeks. She said she thought A had wanted to do this and volunteered, but I explained that she had not volunteered. Team Manager then said she would be happy to do it herself - I offered the help of A and myself whenever she needed it.

A few weeks go by and A brings a holiday gift for Head of Division. He then tells her that Team Manager told him that I refused to let her handle the lunches and that I said A was too busy. Team Manager also told Head of Division that A had volunteered but that I just wouldn't let her do it. A replied that she and I had discussed this and I had asked Team Manager to split the responsibility.

Another week or so goes by and I have a meeting with my boss. He tells me that Head of Division said I was overprotective of my group and was told that I said A could not handle lunches even though she volunteered. I set him straight.  I said I wanted to talk to Head of Division myself and clear this up, but my boss said he would do so.

A week later I asked boss if he had spoken to Head of Division about this. He said no. I asked if I could, and he said he wanted to do it himself.

It is now another week later and I have heard nothing. I feel that Team Manager's deliberate misrepresentation of me is damaging to my reputation and the perceptions of my professionalism. My character is being smeared here.

Obviously Team Manager is lying. Should I confront her? I don't think it is a good idea to go around by boss's back and talk to Head of Division directly. However we are all going to a large company holiday party tomorrow where Head of Division, Director, Team Manager and my boss's boss will be (boss isn't going) so I would have the opportunity to say something to one or all of them in a more relaxed setting.

An I totally nuts for being upset about this? Boss said to just "let it go" but he says that about everything.

[wetblanket]

This seems like a lot of intrigue for something as minor as who will order lunch.  But that is so typical of many workplaces!  "But Marla said SHE would move the deck chairs!"

OK, seriously, this is my advice.  Say nothing.  Let this one go.  But, get into the habit of sending lots of confirmation emails regarding just about everything you discuss with these people from now on.  You've just gotten a lesson in how these people operate.  Use it to protect yourself.  Prepare for some snarkiness when people realize that they will have a tougher time making up stories about you now that you are The Queen of Emails.  But hey, stiff cheese, you're not there to be a pawn in their stupid little games.

[ShadesOfGrey]

Hmm, this is a tricky one.

I would say that since it is about temporary, extra duties and not about a project or something you are directly working on, it is a smaller issue than if it affected your daily functions. It was unprofessional of him to do what he did, but sometimes, we have to put up with people's antics.  Since you set your boss straight, I say going to him after your boss told you not to (by telling you he would do it himself) is overkill and you should let this one lie.  Notice I say this one - if it happens again, I wouldnt even ask Boss, I would just go right to head of division and politely say something to the effect of "Hi, what's going on with XXX?" After he explains, say "A is particularly busy at this point, so I have asked B to split these responsibilities with her.  I am going to let them work it out as to how they want to do it (since they are adults and fully capable of that), but if you have any issues, let me know (slightly emphasizing 'me').  Thanks."  End of discussion.  You have completely cut out Team Manager as part of the discussion (as TM can't be trusted and really HoD started the discussion, no sense in going through so many layers to have words twisted misinterpreted) and it seems that you are the highest ranking in your department site, since Boss is at another location (though I didnt catch if you have a TM yourself).  

Without rambling, I can think of several ways that this scenario played out that it was the result of (honest) misinterpretation, bad timing, and poor management.  Thus, my response above.

I think it is great that you are looking out for your team members, I am sure that they appreciate it too.  Sometimes, annoying things befall them despite our best efforts.

good luck.

[girlmusic]

...it seems that you are the highest ranking in your department site, since Boss is at another location (though I didnt catch if you have a TM yourself).  

Without rambling, I can think of several ways that this scenario played out that it was the result of (honest) misinterpretation, bad timing, and poor management.  Thus, my response above.

I think it is great that you are looking out for your team members, I am sure that they appreciate it too.  Sometimes, annoying things befall them despite our best efforts.

good luck.

I am the highest ranking member of my department on site and do not have a TM. I feel it is part of my job as a good team leader to make sure no one abuses my group in any way and they get the credit they deserve for their efforts.

[girlmusic]

This seems like a lot of intrigue for something as minor as who will order lunch.  But that is so typical of many workplaces!  "But Marla said SHE would move the deck chairs!"

OK, seriously, this is my advice.  Say nothing.  Let this one go.  But, get into the habit of sending lots of confirmation emails regarding just about everything you discuss with these people from now on.  You've just gotten a lesson in how these people operate.  Use it to protect yourself.  Prepare for some snarkiness when people realize that they will have a tougher time making up stories about you now that you are The Queen of Emails.  But hey, stiff cheese, you're not there to be a pawn in their stupid little games.

I am trying to let it go, but that alas is one of my faults. I have a tough time with truly letting go.

My boss knows I won't be pushed around and he likes that about me. In fact when someone complains about me, that's basically what he tells them. 

[Lisbeth]

I guess the best thing to do in your situation is document every single thing you have asked your team members and subordinates to do, and everything you are asked to do, and ask them to do the same.

It's a PITA, but a paper trail ought to help if your boss ever does talk to Head of Division.

In regard to your boss, I'd leave that alone unless Head of Division continues to make a pattern of undermining you.  Then, I'd tell your boss, "I know that you said that you wanted to be the one to deal with Head of Division on this, but I'm not aware that any such interaction took place, and meanwhile, x is happening [show him the documentation] and it is really interfering with my ability to be productive and professional.  I really need help with this."  Document this conversation with your boss too. 

If you still don't get help from your boss, at that point you might go to HR.  But at no time do I think you should confront Head of Division directly.

[girlmusic]

I guess the best thing to do in your situation is document every single thing you have asked your team members and subordinates to do, and everything you are asked to do, and ask them to do the same.

It's a PITA, but a paper trail ought to help if your boss ever does talk to Head of Division.

In regard to your boss, I'd leave that alone unless Head of Division continues to make a pattern of undermining you.  Then, I'd tell your boss, "I know that you said that you wanted to be the one to deal with Head of Division on this, but I'm not aware that any such interaction took place, and meanwhile, x is happening [show him the documentation] and it is really interfering with my ability to be productive and professional.  I really need help with this."  Document this conversation with your boss too. 

If you still don't get help from your boss, at that point you might go to HR.  But at no time do I think you should confront Head of Division directly.

I can tell by your response that I didn't explain myself well.

Head of Division is passing along what he was told by Team Manager and Director, his subordinates - he is not trying to undermine me, they are. Director has repeatedly shown that he does not like me by making other things up about me as well (for instance he told boss that I was spending all day on MySpace and not getting any work done, when I have never been on MySpace and get my work done much faster than expected or required which boss knows). I have already talked to boss about Director, and will document anything that I experience directly.

Head of Division is in a lateral position to boss, as boss works for a different part of the company. They both report to the same person. Head of Division is at the same physical office, while boss is not. Head of Division and I used to meet once a week or so and discuss how things are going, do we need anything, etc. Head of Division has said that I should come to him with any issues I have with his subordinates. This is why I want to talk to him directly.

[Lisbeth]

Well, I'd still advise documenting all the contacts you have with these people and what's being said, because regardless of who's doing it, a paper trail can be very useful.

[girlmusic]

I will.

[Slartibartfast]

Maybe it's just my opinion, but this seems like a BIG deal, and you are NOT unprofessional for sticking up for A.  I have been in A's position before - I was working in the file room, then ended up working the front desk (medical office) but suddenly everyone became helpless to find their own files, and expected me to do the time-consuming work just because I knew how and was good at it.  Unfortunately, my boss was not as aware of this as it sounds like you are, so she didn't back me up and I got stuck doing both.

The "professional" thing to do is to have a talk with A.  Explain that you do respect her promotion and she is not obligated to do things the other employees just don't want to bother with, since she is not the secretary anymore.  Tell her if she feels someone is asking her to do something that's "below them" because she was formerly the secretary, that she should tell them to talk to you.  If she's like me, she would otherwise feel obligated to spend every free moment of the day doing other people's busywork, and they will take advantage of her.

Then when the opportunity arises, make it clear to the other team (and anyone else who needs to know) that A is no longer the secretary, but a valuable member of your team.  She can be assigned tasks like any other employee, but you have given her the authority to forward any requests for "busywork" to you.  Her time is not less valuable than the other employees' time is, and you appreciate if everyone in the office will respect this.

Hopefully there will be a new "low man on the totem pole" soon - it's a sad fact of life, but every office has one.  If there isn't an official lowest position, the honor goes to whoever is the biggest pushover :-(

[girlmusic]

Maybe it's just my opinion, but this seems like a BIG deal, and you are NOT unprofessional for sticking up for A.  I have been in A's position before - I was working in the file room, then ended up working the front desk (medical office) but suddenly everyone became helpless to find their own files, and expected me to do the time-consuming work just because I knew how and was good at it.  Unfortunately, my boss was not as aware of this as it sounds like you are, so she didn't back me up and I got stuck doing both.

The "professional" thing to do is to have a talk with A.  Explain that you do respect her promotion and she is not obligated to do things the other employees just don't want to bother with, since she is not the secretary anymore.  Tell her if she feels someone is asking her to do something that's "below them" because she was formerly the secretary, that she should tell them to talk to you.  If she's like me, she would otherwise feel obligated to spend every free moment of the day doing other people's busywork, and they will take advantage of her.

Then when the opportunity arises, make it clear to the other team (and anyone else who needs to know) that A is no longer the secretary, but a valuable member of your team.  She can be assigned tasks like any other employee, but you have given her the authority to forward any requests for "busywork" to you.  Her time is not less valuable than the other employees' time is, and you appreciate if everyone in the office will respect this.

Hopefully there will be a new "low man on the totem pole" soon - it's a sad fact of life, but every office has one.  If there isn't an official lowest position, the honor goes to whoever is the biggest pushover :-(

I have been hyper-aware of this from the beginning. A already tells me if anyone asks her to do something that is not part of her regular job or outside of the scope of what the other members of our team do. So far, she has been asked to do one other semi-annoying task from her old job, but we discussed it and determined that it winds up directly helping our team, so she has no problem doing it. But this one was discussed with the other department and I was not bypassed in the request. She will also have to train the new receptionist when one is found which will monopolize her time for at least a week, but she has known that from the beginning.

I have also been in A's position and do not want her valuable time used up because someone else is too lazy to do their own job. In fact I have just delegated a really large project to her and she is doing a fantastic job with it. I let her know this and let boss know this too. I am a big believer in giving lots of positive reinforcement. A got to be in charge of this project because she earned it through hard work and dedication and the rest of out team knows this.

She can sometimes be a pushover, but I will NOT let people push her around. She is on my team and will be treated equally with professionalism and respect. She knows that if someone does something that upsets or bothers her, or if they ask her to do something that is not her responsibility that I will step in and do my best to remedy the situation.  (This message of strength comes to you courtesy of the woman with a "Roise the Riveter" mousepad on her desk.)