school band follies

[Tabris]

We confirmed yesterday that my son is actually going to participate in the school band concert. The beginner students are only on page 2 of their books. They're playing one-line "songs" for their piece. One of them, they learned yesterday. Concert is next week.

Teacher sent home a note asking us to bring in music stands if we have any, otherwise there won't be enough. (Sure, why not? It only weighs about fifteen pounds, plus the saxophone, plus 4 textbooks.)

They have to wear their official band shirts all day. Official band shirts are short sleeves. It's been in the 20s and 30s lately. My son will turn into a kidsickle.

At least his shirt will fit, but only because I made a rukus about it. The school wanted to order only adult sizes for the student band. They're all 4th and 5th graders. The school nurse grudgingly agreed she could order a child large if I requested it. I requested a child MEDIUM instead, and voila, one shirt that fits.

He has to do three concerts, two during school and one after. He has to be there an hour early to rehearse with the band...for the first time ever.

He's *also* singing with the chorus. But not at the same time he's playing with the band...I hope. Given how well this has been organized so far, I can't say for sure.

The last concert will be over at 8:30. This is a hugely long day for a nine year old.

What is the etiquette of watching a train wreck?

Shoot us now. It's kinder that way.     

[stanthedevil]

I would recommend a long sleeved t-shirt or thermals under the band shirt.  That's what I have my kiddos in choir do who get cold easily.  I also allow them to wear a sweater or sweatshirt which they have to take off while we are singing.

As far as the band goes, perhaps a word to the principal or band teacher could get to the root of the problem and improve the program.  If that doesn't work, I would start looking at other options for Little Tabris.  Many areas have a youth symphony.  Also, if he takes private lessons, often the teacher will have studio concerts involving all of the students.  Some music stores that offer private lessons also have concerts involving all students.

[Tabris]

I'd already told him to do the long-sleeve thing, so he's set there. And yeah, we gave up on the school-based lessons when it was early November and he still couldn't reliably blow any of the three notes she had already taught him. After two lessons with the private instructor (who ROCKS!) he was much, much happier and dare I say, competent?

I didn't ask the private instructor if he does recitals with his students.

I'm just so frustrated with the lack of planning that's gone on in the music program. He had the instrument for three weeks before the lesson schedule was even announced; the lessons were lame for the first month he *did* have them; what kind of idiot orders only adult sizes (small to XXL) for fourth-graders; and now the total lack of planning on the concert. I'm not even sure whom to complain to or about in this whole fiasco.

And the stupid thing is, now that we're doing the private lessons, he LOVES saxophone. They could have squashed that love of music out of him if we hadn't done that.

[freakyfemme]

Wow......just......wow.  That teacher must be pretty lazy, because most students just beginning to learn to play instruments progress pretty quickly, considering the fact that the pieces are simple, and require almost nothing in the way of dynamics or interpretation.  It sounds like Little Tabris is enthusiastic about music, practices regularly, and honestly wants to learn, so getting him private lessons was definitely a good idea.   I just feel sorry for the other kids in the class, whose parents can't afford to get them private lessons, aren't willing to, or aren't aware that that option is available to them.  Those kids are just going to grow up thinking that music is boring, or too difficult, or that they simply have no talent. 

Edited to add:  About the music stands, it's possible to get lightweight folding music stands from most music stores.  I have one at home, and it's not in perfect condition (the little black rubber "feet" fell off many moons ago), but it still does the job, and I've had it since grade eleven.

[RoseRose]

POD to freakyfemme.

I played an instrument (clarinet) in 6th grade through high school, and by our winter concert (2 months or a bit more after first picking up our instruments) we were playing full pieces of music.  Easy pieces (like Jingle Bells) but we were 10 or so pages into our book, maybe more.  And my teacher was not very competent as a teacher.  I can't imagine what Little Tabris's teacher is like.

Also agree on the music stand, though I treated mine roughly, because I got it in 6th grade, and it died a couple years in, but at that point I was at high school, which DID have enough stands.

[Sirius]

I started playing the clarinet when I was in fifth grade, and our band instructor was a brand new teacher, and had it together better than that (although only because parents helped him.)  Maybe this instructor is brand new and doesn't really know what they're doing yet.   

I also think it's good that the OP's son can take private lessons.  My parents could never afford it when I was young so I've never taken them, and now, at age 48, I'd like to take lessons but I'm afraid the first time a teacher would tell me I was doing something wrong my temper would get in the way and I'd tell them to drop dead.  Or, I'd say something like, "You mean I've been doing it wrong since 1968?" 

Sirius (aka Vegakitty)

[freakyfemme]

I started playing the clarinet when I was in fifth grade, and our band instructor was a brand new teacher, and had it together better than that (although only because parents helped him.)  Maybe this instructor is brand new and doesn't really know what they're doing yet.   

I also think it's good that the OP's son can take private lessons.  My parents could never afford it when I was young so I've never taken them, and now, at age 48, I'd like to take lessons but I'm afraid the first time a teacher would tell me I was doing something wrong my temper would get in the way and I'd tell them to drop dead.  Or, I'd say something like, "You mean I've been doing it wrong since 1968?" 

Sirius (aka Vegakitty)

Hey, if you lived anywhere near me, I'd be happy to teach you some stuff.

[Clara Bow]

I remembre myt brief career with the violin, cut down in it's infancy by the horror of elementary school orchestra (and the fact that I sucked) We had to play Ode to Joy at our 6th grade graduation. All the rehearsal and practice at home (my parents are saints, write it down) and my passion to become a musician was dead (oh yeah, and I sucked).
Persevere. When he's playing on Broadway, this will make a great story to tell on A and E....

[Ulla dances in a silly way]

At least his shirt will fit, but only because I made a rukus about it. The school wanted to order only adult sizes for the student band. They're all 4th and 5th graders. The school nurse grudgingly agreed she could order a child large if I requested it. I requested a child MEDIUM instead, and voila, one shirt that fits.

What is wrong with schools? I had this problem a lot in band. Even into highschool, I couldn't wear an adult sized t shirt (still can't...) I'll never forget the band jacket "salesman" who almost refused to let me buy a small band jacket (which still swallowed me whole!) The band would never order even adult smalls for me, I always had to just deal with a medium. But really, for 4th and 5th graders? Maybe a few of them need the big sizes but that's just ridiculous to refuse to order child sizes.

-Ulla

[freakyfemme]

At least his shirt will fit, but only because I made a rukus about it. The school wanted to order only adult sizes for the student band. They're all 4th and 5th graders. The school nurse grudgingly agreed she could order a child large if I requested it. I requested a child MEDIUM instead, and voila, one shirt that fits.

What is wrong with schools? I had this problem a lot in band. Even into highschool, I couldn't wear an adult sized t shirt (still can't...) I'll never forget the band jacket "salesman" who almost refused to let me buy a small band jacket (which still swallowed me whole!) The band would never order even adult smalls for me, I always had to just deal with a medium. But really, for 4th and 5th graders? Maybe a few of them need the big sizes but that's just ridiculous to refuse to order child sizes.

-Ulla

I had the opposite problem in grade eleven.  We were going on a band trip to Italy, and in addition to our regular "formal" uniforms, which consisted of red blazers, white dress shirts (with black ties for boys), black pants (boys), black skirts with black pantyhose (girls), and black dress shoes, we also had to have "casual" uniforms for places like airports, the Vatican, and other formal museums, that consisted of black bottoms (our choice), white golf shirts, and blackwatch jackets.  Now, I was quite overweight at that age, so I needed a bigger jacket, but they refused to give me one, saying they were "saving them for the boys," and the one they gave me was so small it actually hurt to wear it.  No matter what I said, they wouldn't give me a bigger one, and then they got mad at me for not wearing the too-small one when we travelled.  Well, like I'd tried to tell them, it was *too small.*

[Sirius]

Hey, if you lived anywhere near me, I'd be happy to teach you some stuff.

Hey, FreakyFemme.  I'm in the Portland area of Oregon. 

Sirius (aka Vegakitty)

[L2]

I believe that it would be good to approach this teacher exactly the same way one would talk to any teacher with whom there are problems - Actually go talk to the band teacher and talk about the problems your child is having in that class.  Talk about *specific* problems, don't just say (for example) "What are you DOING?  No one is learning anything!!!"" 

Is this teacher a qualified band teacher (with special education in band pedagogy) or is it a regular teacher who is teaching the band in his/her "spare" time?  Is the band a required fine arts class or is it "extracurricular"?  Offer to help this teacher in some way (it sounds as if s/he could certainly use some).  If the teacher blows you off, then go talk to the department head or the principal.  During all of this talking *stay calm and stay on topic*.  Oh, and keep records of exactly how and when everything happens.  A clear paper trail is your friend in trying to get anything done in almost every bureaucracy!

Good luck - bad teachers are the bane of my existence!

[freakyfemme]

Hey, if you lived anywhere near me, I'd be happy to teach you some stuff.

Hey, FreakyFemme.  I'm in the Portland area of Oregon. 

Sirius (aka Vegakitty)

No good.  I live in Barrie, Ontario, but I go to school in Quebec.  I don't drive, and I can't afford to fly, and you know, if you've been playing the clarinet since 1968, you're probably much better than me anyway.....I've only been playing since 1998, lol.

[Jessie]

I know having to bring a music stand is annoying (I know, I've moved enough of them) but that's probably not the teacher's fault. Everywhere has cut funding to music and art departments so much that it's a miracle they even exist.

[Balletmom]

The organization part is so key to a good experience or not.

Not ordering shirts in child sizes is ridiculous. If it costs more, charge that to the parents, who would rather have a shirt that fits and pay $2 more for it. Especially in 5/6 grades, where the size differences can be amazing.

My oldest daughter is in drama at school and the ballet out of school. The school drama festival--she had to be there at 6:15 on Saturday morning. She had to dress up (and not just a nice outfit, a dressy one.) AND bring her drama t-shirt and jeans. AND money for the pizza, which they sometimes run out of, and then come home around eleven p.m.--late because they didn't finish the competitions on time. Oh, and she doesn't bring home a medal from the duet competition, because they only had ONE medal for a two-person event.

Ballet, on the other hand, is with a regional pre-professional company. The rehearsals run late only if there are technical difficulties with the stage crew, who are employees of the venue and not the company. She is expected to come to the theater in street clothes but manage her costume backstage, and it doesn't really matter how she looks like when she arrives, as long as she performs perfectly in the costume--and all dancers from a very young age are expected to manage their own costume pieces backstage. Leave and arrive however you wish, but be on stage with the right stuff.  They have some last minute demands and last minute practices, and it takes up a huge, huge amount of time, but the difference in organization is unbelievable.

So, when there's a conflict between drama and ballet, we go with ballet, and the drama teacher cannot understand why that is so.

It'ws just the organization. We don't expect anybody to be perfect, but reasonable, yes.

Oh, and not coincidentally, the ballet has taught her far more about stage discipline and theatre, then the drama class has.