OK the title just sounds wrong but once you get past that...
I have two friends who do mortgages (at 2 separate companies). Mr. Sweede and I will be looking to buy a place soon. However, he feels very uncomfortable using either friend because he doesn't want anyone to know our financial business in that kind of detail.
Now, he loves both friends, trusts them and they are good at what they do. They are both expecting our business - they send us house listings in certain neighborhoods and tell us about great rates they got for other clients, but not in an annoying way - just kind of in a "I can't wait to help you out" way.
If it were my decision I would actually choose to use one of the friends. However, I do not want to fight about money with Mr. Sweede and I also feel that we need to present the proverbial "united front" so it doesn't look like it is Mr. Sweede who is saying "no". They will both be upset/disappointed that we are not using them. I already know this.
I want to deal with this proactively as I think they would be even more hurt if they found out later on that we were already using a different mortgage company so this is what I am thinking and I'd like to know your thoughts on if I am handling this correctly (separate email to each person):
As you know, Mr. Sweede and I will be looking to buy a house soon and we're really excited. We know that you work for X Company doing mortgages, and we are going to be getting a mortgage soon, but we really don't want to mix friendship and business. We don't want you to think this is any reflection on our friendship - we value your friendship very, very much and know that you would do an excellent job of getting us a mortgage, but we have heard too many horror stories of friendships gone wrong due to business dealings, and we would never want that to happen to us. We just wanted to make sure that you understood our decision as we want to share the details of our house hunting with you and we don't want anything to be awkward.
Love, Mr. & Mrs. Sweede