Author Topic: Signs that crack you up  (Read 264434 times)

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Seraphia

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1080 on: October 07, 2011, 10:13:43 PM »
I have a pair of them. I was working in Pontiac this week on a project for Chrysler. Entering the parking garage, there is a sign that reads:

Competitive Vehicle Parking on Roof Only.

As you enter the roof level, another one says: Competitive Vehicle Parking Beyond This Point.

I know what they mean to say, but the wording puts me in mind of a demolition derby on the roof, with rival Hondas, BMWs and Fords bashing and smashing into each other for a few coveted spots, like a car version of musical chairs.

OK, you've got me--what is "competitive vehicle parking"?

What it's meant to say is *Competitor* Vehicle Parking, as in cars not made by Chrysler or affiliates. Sort of how people who work at say, Abercrombie, need to wear those clothes when they work, Chrysler doesn't want competitors' cars displayed at their own headquarters. (Although my beat-up Civic is kind of a doubtful advertisement for Honda when up against a brand-new 300 anyway)
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wendelenn

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1081 on: October 07, 2011, 10:27:54 PM »
I have a pair of them. I was working in Pontiac this week on a project for Chrysler. Entering the parking garage, there is a sign that reads:

Competitive Vehicle Parking on Roof Only.

As you enter the roof level, another one says: Competitive Vehicle Parking Beyond This Point.

I know what they mean to say, but the wording puts me in mind of a demolition derby on the roof, with rival Hondas, BMWs and Fords bashing and smashing into each other for a few coveted spots, like a car version of musical chairs.

OK, you've got me--what is "competitive vehicle parking"?

What it's meant to say is *Competitor* Vehicle Parking, as in cars not made by Chrysler or affiliates. Sort of how people who work at say, Abercrombie, need to wear those clothes when they work, Chrysler doesn't want competitors' cars displayed at their own headquarters. (Although my beat-up Civic is kind of a doubtful advertisement for Honda when up against a brand-new 300 anyway)

Ah, that makes sense. :)
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White Dragon

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1082 on: October 09, 2011, 04:57:45 PM »
You know how some towns have population signs as you enter?

One tiny tiny town near us has a population sign that lists the number of dogs and cats in the town too.

I passed a sign last week that said

Lost Springs
Pop. 4


We almost went back and took a picture.

Wagontire, Idaho
Pop 3

Yeah, we shoulda gone back for the picture!

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1083 on: October 11, 2011, 07:53:27 AM »
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Cuddlepie

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1084 on: October 16, 2011, 09:39:24 PM »
Today I read a news headline....sort of a sign....right ?

"Airline loses child.  Mother offered voucher."

I read it and blinked hard, 'cos I took it literally for a second or two.  :D

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1085 on: October 17, 2011, 02:02:07 PM »
Today I read a news headline....sort of a sign....right ?

"Airline loses child.  Mother offered voucher."

I read it and blinked hard, 'cos I took it literally for a second or two.  :D

What was the actual story??

drebay

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1086 on: October 17, 2011, 02:10:47 PM »
Today I read a news headline....sort of a sign....right ?

"Airline loses child.  Mother offered voucher."

I read it and blinked hard, 'cos I took it literally for a second or two.  :D

What was the actual story??

I found this

http://www.heraldsun.com.au/travel/news/qantas-loses-boy-sorry-heres-a-travel-voucher/story-fn32891l-1226168118089

Cuddlepie

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1087 on: October 17, 2011, 07:11:06 PM »
drebay - thanks for adding the link.   Cuddlepie

drebay

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1088 on: October 18, 2011, 01:42:29 PM »
drebay - thanks for adding the link.   Cuddlepie

You are most welcome.

Where's the Quiet?

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1089 on: October 20, 2011, 04:50:01 PM »
This thread is too much fun!

On a hike up to a cave I saw a sign that said, "Running can be hazardous to your health." I took a picture to turn in at gym because I hated running.

At Bryce Canyon in Utah there was a sign that said to find shade and wait for help if you get lost. Not so bad, but the picture they had on the sign showed miles of desert and a sad tiny tree that provided next to no shade.

While shopping at the toy store a few weeks ago we I saw a sign that said "Save $0!" Upon closer inspection, it turns out that the sale price was $44.99 and the original price was $39.99. It made me laugh as is, but part of me wishes it said "Save -$5.00!"

Last one I can think of right now is the name of a town in South Dakota. It's called Pukwana and the smell around it was horrible! I don't know that it should be pronounced puke-wanna, but it sure seemed appropriate.

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1090 on: October 20, 2011, 05:16:46 PM »
My favorite headline spotted in a local newspaper was "Glass Eyes Nomination".

I was rather disappointed to discover it was a man named Glass who was considering running for election.
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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1091 on: October 20, 2011, 05:27:19 PM »
This was funnier when it didn't need so much explaining, but here goes anyway. DH is a real estate appraiser. Appraisers generate reports about the subject property and the nearby comparable sales, or "comps." On one page of the report, there is a map with arrows pointing at "Subject," "Comp 1," "Comp 2" and so on. These days you click and drag them on a screen, of course, but at the time they were still doing paper reports. You rubbed the little arrows on from a transfer sheet.

So anyway, there was a postcard on the bulletin board with Heathcliff the cat next to a huge stone lion, with the caption "Dream Big!" It didn't take long before someone had added a "Comp 1" arrow pointing at Heathcliff.

I am reviewing real estate appraisals right now (or will be, when my break is over), and that made laugh. We underwriters have our own little bits of appraisal humor (that probably no one else finds funny)
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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1092 on: October 20, 2011, 09:26:12 PM »
Not a sign, but an e-mail popped up in my inbox with the following title:

Defeat Dracula with the flick of a switch!

It was a sale notice from Ott-Light.
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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1093 on: October 20, 2011, 11:11:38 PM »
Not a sign, but an e-mail popped up in my inbox with the following title:

Defeat Dracula with the flick of a switch!

It was a sale notice from Ott-Light.

HAHA!
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snowfire

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Re: Signs that crack you up
« Reply #1094 on: November 20, 2011, 01:37:23 AM »
Not a sign, but a product.

DH & I were at Cabela's tonight seeing if there was anything we were interested in for their big sale tomorrow.  I happened to look at some boxes of ammo that were sitting on the counter in the gun department...
http://www.hornady.com/ammunition/zombiemax
I howled.