Signs that crack you up

[Shoo]

There's some road construction going on in our area.  We were heading out some place, and passed through some of this construction, where there was a sign alongside the road that said "DIP."

My dd said, "Daddy!  Did you see what that sign called you?!!"

[skbenny]

Two cemeteries that I frequent have road signs right before you enter "Dead End" - cracks me up every time.

A local church had a sign "Swallow your pride, it has 0 calories".

[officeworker]

Seen just a few weeks ago on a Dairy Queen marquee:

"Scream until Daddy stops"


Ooooh, we had to shake our heads over that one!  (double entendre for sure)
I wish I'd had the time to take a picture.

[Cyndi]

On our neighbor's fence:

"Forget about the dog. Beware the owner!" And underneath the text is a picture of a pistol pointed at you.

[CinHough]

Once when my husband and I were driving home after a vacation in St. Louis (we live in Iowa), we had just gotten into a disagreement and currently weren't speaking to each other.  As we were driving past this horribly run-down diner, we both notice the big arrow marque which read:

HO made pies


We both started to giggle hysterically and then couldn't remember what we had been fighting about. 

I mean really, what a horrible thing to put about the poor lady who baked all their pies!   

[Calbrini]

At the Docks there was a sign saying "trespassers if not drowned will be prosecuted". I wondered if this choice was given to the trespasser iftheywere caught.

[lovinAZ]

there was one of those big signs in front of a strip mall, which advertised all of the stores in the strip mall.  i always laughed when i went by, as there were only two large signs in the display:

so-and-so's asian kitchen
urgent care emergency medical

[Paper Roses]

The high-rise building where I went to business school had a strip mall on the bottom floor.  There was a jewelry store that had a sign inside that said

"Ears pierced while you wait."

I swear it's true.


Maybe this one doesn't count because it's supposed to be funny, but I'll post it anyway.  The last time we went on vacation to San Diego, there were billboards all over the place with funny sayings on them - I don't remember what they were advertising, but my favorite was the one that said

"Why did Kamakaze pilots wear helmets?"

[housewife2k]

For the first sign, I will see if Hubby can dig out the pictures, to prove it's true!  Hubby used to work for a movie theatre. He showed up one day, and immediately walked into the manager's office to explain that the marquee needed to be changed immediately. They were showing three movies at the time, the marquee read "Erin Brokovitch" "Screwed" "My Dog Skip"

Onother sign, which we sadly didn't get a picture of, was at a hotel in the town where our Ren Faire is, either the wind had knocked down a key letter, or there was a vandal with a bad sense of humor, the sign read "Take the plunge in our heated poo"

I will admit to giggleing whenever I pass a sign that says DIP

[dtbrad]

Another famous movie one is:
Alien
Meatballs
Escape from Alcatraz

[mariadis]

  I like the warning (separate from the list of ingredients) on the bag of peanuts that states"warning:contains peanuts".

[RainhaDoTexugo]

I'll share another one that I wish I'd been able to take a photo of.  In downtown Chicago there's a Wacker Drive and a Lake Shore Drive.  A few years ago, there was major construction on Wacker, and the city put up big LCD signs that said "Wacker closed:  Use LSD."  They lasted about one day before they caught on that they were advocating drug use and rephrased it 

[IndianInlaw]

FOREST PARK BEAR RIGHT

 As a kid, I spent years looking to the right for that bear.

It finally occurred to me that you stayed in the right lane for Forest Park.

[extranormal]

Many years ago, there was a Kentucky Fried Chicken in Chicago with some signage problems.

On one side of the building, it had the name of the business. But only the first and last letters in "Kentucky" were illuminated.

On another side, it usually read, "The Colonel." But the "e" and "l" had burnt out.

So people were being asked to buy KY Fried Chicken from The Colon.

[Elle]

I saw this walking by a church a few years ago:
"Are you the loaf or the fish?"
If I'd seen it on time I would have popped in for the sermon. To this day it haunts me; am I the loaf or am I the fish?