Author Topic: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?  (Read 11864 times)

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FoxPaws

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Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« on: October 02, 2007, 07:18:39 AM »
In the past couple of days, I've seen at least two threads where someone used "the line" simply because they disagreed with something a previous poster said.

There is a difference between an assumption and an opinion.

TAIA is one of the great comeback lines of all time, but it doesn't apply to all circumstances. Using it inappropriately reduces it to a quick, sitcom "zinger" and dilutes it's overall effect. This is especially true on a forum where there is time and space to politely clarify, debate, and express oneself.

Of course, this is just my humble.......opinion.  :)
I am so a lady. And if you say I'm not, I'll slug you. - Cindy Brady

wellisawstar

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #1 on: October 02, 2007, 07:54:15 AM »
I was just about to post a thread about this. I've found a few instances like the ones you've described. The use of TAIA seems..well..a little backhanded on this forum when it's not used for etiquette.

JordanX

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #2 on: October 02, 2007, 09:33:10 AM »
It happened to me, and I came over here to mention how this statement can be misused and found this thread. 

An OP asked if they were overreacting to something and I replied that my opinion was that they were being a bit "rigid" and therefore, yes, IMO, overreacting.  I got a miffed response that started with TAIA.

In that context, the TAIA came across as pretty snarky/rude.  First of all, an opinion that has been asked for is not an inappropriate assumption that needs shutting down.  And that's what TAIA is for, right?  Shutting down someone who has stated something (a) unsolicited (b) inappropriate and (c) rude.  IMO, I hadn't done anything like that.                                                                     

sasha

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #3 on: October 02, 2007, 12:53:31 PM »
In the past couple of days, I've seen at least two threads where someone used "the line" simply because they disagreed with something a previous poster said.

There is a difference between an assumption and an opinion.

Totally agree. Used when someone hasn't made an assumption smacks of passive-agression and superiority, IMO.

Sasha

stargazer

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #4 on: October 02, 2007, 01:35:22 PM »
In the past couple of days, I've seen at least two threads where someone used "the line" simply because they disagreed with something a previous poster said.

There is a difference between an assumption and an opinion.

Totally agree. Used when someone hasn't made an assumption smacks of passive-agression and superiority, IMO.

Sasha

ITA.  You said what I was thinking a lot better than I could have.  This phrase is starting to grate on me a bit just for that reason.

fluffy

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #5 on: October 02, 2007, 01:49:11 PM »
Wow! I wanted to start a thread about the same thing!

I'm starting to really dislike "the line" because it's starting to feel like a little etiquette in-joke and shorthand for "I don't agree with you" or "I think that you're being silly." It's like the anti-POD/ITA.

It's a good line, it just seems to be getting overused.

AndreaX

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #6 on: October 02, 2007, 02:34:48 PM »
In the past couple of days, I've seen at least two threads where someone used "the line" simply because they disagreed with something a previous poster said.

There is a difference between an assumption and an opinion.

Totally agree. Used when someone hasn't made an assumption smacks of passive-agression and superiority, IMO.

Sasha

ITA.  You said what I was thinking a lot better than I could have.  This phrase is starting to grate on me a bit just for that reason.

Amen sisters

Bob Ducca

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #7 on: October 02, 2007, 03:18:03 PM »
I've had it used on me once, and I felt like it was completely out of line and I felt very offended.  I'm not saying the poster didn't have the right to disagree with me, but he demanded clarification on my post, and when I gave it, he responded with "the line." 

It seemed like he was only asking for clarification to belittle me, and then pulled out "the line" when there were many legitimate arguments he could have made in response to my clarification:

"That has not been my experience," for example, would have worked well.

What truly bothered me was that I was expressing an opinion (as I clearly stated) based on my personal interactions with people.  How is that an assumption?  Sheesh...

FoxPaws

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #8 on: October 02, 2007, 03:37:47 PM »
What truly bothered me was that I was expressing an opinion (as I clearly stated) based on my personal interactions with people.  How is that an assumption?  Sheesh...

This was similar to my experience. I had actually prefaced my comment with "IMHO" and got "the line" in return.

To me, an assumption is a guess made on the basis of incomplete information. I know what I think, and while anyone is free to disagree with my opinion, slamming me down with a one liner just to be snarky is unnecessary.
I am so a lady. And if you say I'm not, I'll slug you. - Cindy Brady

platys

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #9 on: October 02, 2007, 04:28:35 PM »
Honestly, I haven't seen a non-rude usage of the phrase in context of a thread.   It's a lot like the dreaded "um" - its insulting almost all the time.   

Now, if someone walks up to you and goes "So, you must be on welfare!", yeah, use it.  Someone disagrees with you on a thread?  Leave it alone.

JoieGirl7

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #10 on: October 02, 2007, 04:41:06 PM »
It is a polite etiquette smack in the face, meant for strangers who voice rude assumptions.
 
In the context of a thread, I have only seen it used properly once and that was where someone directly insulted someone else and the insulted party used it.
 
But, when people are asking for opinions, they are asking for interesting assumptions especially if they do not provide enough info in a post where one has to assume many things.

blue2000

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #11 on: October 02, 2007, 05:18:37 PM »
It is a polite etiquette smack in the face, meant for strangers who voice rude assumptions.
 
In the context of a thread, I have only seen it used properly once and that was where someone directly insulted someone else and the insulted party used it.
 
But, when people are asking for opinions, they are asking for interesting assumptions especially if they do not provide enough info in a post where one has to assume many things.

ITA.

If you are truly making an insulting assumption based on NOTHING - that is a good time to use the line.

If you are giving your opinion in a thread, chances are you are working with whatever limited info you have. The poster should correct your info, if it is wrong, but not tell you you are assuming things.

BTW, I think 'lines' in general should be used sparingly, no matter where you are. They are supposed to be for the truly rude statements, to shut someone down. Not for any and all discussions where people disagree. The same as the 'icy glare' would not usually be appropriate in discussions IRL. It's just not very friendly.
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ZipTheWonder

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #12 on: October 02, 2007, 05:29:54 PM »
It is a polite etiquette smack in the face, meant for strangers who voice rude assumptions.

I actually don't see it as all that polite.  It sounds to me a lot like "What an idiot you are for thinking so."

JoieGirl7

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #13 on: October 02, 2007, 05:56:30 PM »
It is a polite etiquette smack in the face, meant for strangers who voice rude assumptions.

I actually don't see it as all that polite.  It sounds to me a lot like "What an idiot you are for thinking so."
Which is why you should only use it on idiots who think stupid things about you.
 
As far as its politeness, it is like a verbal icy stare which is not in and of itself rude when in response to certain comments that strangers will make.
 
Some people make really innapropriate comments to perfect strangers and they deserve something for their trouble.  "What an interesting assumption" gives them a response that ends (hopefully) the conversation.

heathert

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Re: Misused and abused: Was it really an assumption?
« Reply #14 on: October 02, 2007, 11:50:59 PM »
Maybe a good response then would be to ask the person what exactly they're stating that you are assuming?  They would have to think then.

Heather