Family and Christmas

[lkdrymom]

I'd like to say I'm shocked but I am not. Two years ago I asked my dad if he would be available to help out with the kids because I had to have my gall bladder removed. He was agreeable until he found out it was on his poker night and he just couldn't cancel that (mine you his friends cancel for alot less serious reasons all the time). Couldn't i reschedule? Thanks Dad. I already knew how I rated, this was just another confirmaiton.

Last year he became ill while out with friends and was take to the hospital which was over two hours from where I lived. He stayed for tests for a few days but I was expected to take time off from work and drive to South Jersey to pick him up. When I got there I told him he was lucky I didn't have a poker game scheduled. He didn't get the joke.

[Hawkwatcher]

I wish that I could say that this was a single event.

Unfortunately FIL is one of those people who has to be the center of attention. He will not go to any of the grandchildren's events because as he put it, " There is no one important there".

I think that I would drop out of holding the family event this year.  With the stress of your son's surgery and your grandfather's comments, you may not be in the mood to host a big celebration.  Anyone who cannot understand that your first priority is your children and not providing free food and entertainment does not deserve the pleasure of your company or your hospitality.

As for your FIL, I suspect that he will eventually get a taste of his own medicine.  Eventually his grandchildren will figure out what he thinks of them, if they do not know his opinion already.  When your FIL is older, he may decide that he wants the company of his grandchildren but they may find more "important" people to spend their time with.

[Balletmom]

I think that I would drop out of holding the family event this year.  With the stress of your son's surgery and your grandfather's comments, you may not be in the mood to host a big celebration.  Anyone who cannot understand that your first priority is your children and not providing free food and entertainment does not deserve the pleasure of your company or your hospitality.

As for your FIL, I suspect that he will eventually get a taste of his own medicine.  Eventually his grandchildren will figure out what he thinks of them, if they do not know his opinion already.  When your FIL is older, he may decide that he wants the company of his grandchildren but they may find more "important" people to spend their time with.

I agree. However, it's painful to watch your children come to that realization.

[goblue2539]

I agree. However, it's painful to watch your children come to that realization.

However painful it is, it's necessary.  And it's much better for them to come to it themselves than for you (or anyone else in the family) to tell them.