Internet etiquette

[Mrs. Eclipse]

Here's one- what about quoting the entire original post, to make sure everyone knows what you're responding to?  Does that happen anywhere outside Gaia.com?  Because that happened to me all the time, and it was just silly.

Another thing that gest me, and it especially happens on IMDB.com, is, say, somebody posts in Controversial Actor's board with a question.

Is it true Controversial Actor has a vacation home in Ontario?  I heard it the other day but can't find out if it's true.  Has anyone heard this?

And someone replies

Controversial Actor is horrible and needs to die NOW lol

Which a) has no relevance to the post, and b) usually marks the point where the thread dissolves into fighting, name-calling, flaming, and all-around immaturity.

Most people defend posts such as the need to die one by saying, "This board is for everyone, not just fans of the actor!"  Which really is true, but doesn't do a lot to defend their actions.

  Ugh

Also, I can't post on some boards for... unpopular movies because most people on the board hate the movie, and if I post a discussion that has pro-movie themes, everybody will just come on and say how horrible it was.  And if I post, "For Fans only," they'll say, "This board is for everyone, not just the fans!"

[twinkletoes]

Oh, lord, imdb.com attracts all types! 

I've posted on the board for Joshua Jackson, and to this day, people will *still* start threads about how happy they were that (spoilers!) Joey ended up with Pacey, or that they are still upset because she should have ended up with Dawson.  Mind, "Dawson's Creek" ended almost four years ago!  Also, this will come up in really random threads - it might be a thread discussing Josh's latest work, and then someone will throw in some comment about Pacey-Joey-Dawson.  Ay yi yi!

[kathrynne]

Paragraphs, please. Punctuation, please. Correct spelling is nice, but I realize grammar is far beyond some people. I once had to read a 26-page long SENTENCE for a literature class and vowed "never again." I will not read a huge block of type, especially if it's something I'm allegedly reading for pleasure. There's nothing pleasurable about the migraine that will give me.

In email the only thing that irks me more than spam is spam from "friends" and relatives. You know the stuff, "pass this (urban legend) along to 250 people and we'll have world peace in five minutes." "If you don't pass this on to at least 20 people (200 would be better) your (sic) not patriotic and will die horribly tomorrow."

Then there's my favorite, "Pass this along to everyone you love AND send it back to me to prove you love me. If I don't get this back I'll know what it means," of course implying it means I don't love you.

Well, I don't. I recently sent an email to the people who insisted on sending me chain emails every day demanding that they stop. Was it rude? Probably, but no more rude than the constant barrage of chain emails and urban legends. It also served the purpose of getting my MIL to give me the silent treatment for a few weeks! ;-)

[drzim]

I lurk mostly, because I don't like to post unless I have something new to add to the discussion.

The bad grammar/spelling and long paragraphs can get to me, but my biggest peeve is when a poster asks a question or asks for advice and people don't bother to actually answer the question, but pick apart some small detail and/or turn it into a big argument.

This happened to me on the old board, and I didn't post for quite a long time afterward because I was called "selfish" and "unappreciative" and "entitled".  All I did was ask if it was rude to do "X", or if there was a way I could mention "X" politely.  A simple "no" would have suited me fine.

[Venus193]

Here's an e-mail one I posted to the old board:  If you are an AOHell member, clean up your forwards if you want me to read the original message.  This is for the following reasons:

• If I am the 20th person on the "forward" chain, the previous message is treated as an attachment 20 times.  If I have to open a chain of attachments, you've lost me.
• The other people within the chain might not appreciate their e-mail addresses going out to people they don't know.

[Lisbeth]

Here's an e-mail one I posted to the old board:  If you are an AOHell member, clean up your forwards if you want me to read the original message.  This is for the following reasons:

• If I am the 20th person on the "forward" chain, the previous message is treated as an attachment 20 times.  If I have to open a chain of attachments, you've lost me.
• The other people within the chain might not appreciate their e-mail addresses going out to people they don't know.

I remember one time I asked a cousin who kept forwarding me E-mails if she'd do this, because I'd opened 20 attachments without seeing the main message.  She claimed that she "didn't have the time" to cut and paste.

But she expected everyone she sent that E-mail to (they were these mass E-mails) to have the time to have to open 20 or more attachments! 

[kathrynne]

Here's an e-mail one I posted to the old board:  If you are an AOHell member, clean up your forwards if you want me to read the original message.  This is for the following reasons:

• If I am the 20th person on the "forward" chain, the previous message is treated as an attachment 20 times.  If I have to open a chain of attachments, you've lost me.
• The other people within the chain might not appreciate their e-mail addresses going out to people they don't know.

I addressed both of these points in my "rude" email asking that people stop sending me chain emails and I don't believe any of the recipients "got" it. When I compiled the mailing list for that email I even used myself as the recipient with those who needed to read it as BCCs, just so nobody would know anyone else's addy. Ugh.

[Venus193]

But she expected everyone she sent that E-mail to (they were these mass E-mails) to have the time to have to open 20 or more attachments!

That drives me batty.  My college buddy is guilty of the same excuse.  

At my office we still have Lotus Notes, which has a "do not copy" feature.  I don't know if it can prevent him from forwarding anything I send him because he has Outlook, but when I sent him my Halloween photo it was with the intent that it go no farther.  If I ever see it in another forward I will really lose it at him.

[goblue2539]

Well, I don't. I recently sent an email to the people who insisted on sending me chain emails every day demanding that they stop. Was it rude? Probably, but no more rude than the constant barrage of chain emails and urban legends. It also served the purpose of getting my MIL to give me the silent treatment for a few weeks! ;-)

Do you have a copy of that email that you'd let me adjust to send to my father?  He thinks that because he sends me forwards we're still in touch and have a relationship.  I'd love to find a way to just tell him to stop.  Telling him I'd like to hear from him and about him hasn't worked yet.

[kathrynne]

Well, I don't. I recently sent an email to the people who insisted on sending me chain emails every day demanding that they stop. Was it rude? Probably, but no more rude than the constant barrage of chain emails and urban legends. It also served the purpose of getting my MIL to give me the silent treatment for a few weeks! ;-)

Do you have a copy of that email that you'd let me adjust to send to my father?  He thinks that because he sends me forwards we're still in touch and have a relationship.  I'd love to find a way to just tell him to stop.  Telling him I'd like to hear from him and about him hasn't worked yet.

I'm sure I still have it in my "Sent Items" folder somewhere, but I warn you it's got "A Scotch-Irish Scorpio with PMS was REALLY ticked off" written all over it. The night I drafted it I'd found a total of 44 messages in my Inbox with the following breakdown:
14 Viagra spams
8 bogus stock spams
2 mortgage refi spams
2 outdated virus "alerts" from someone new to the Internet (the viruses mentioned were more than five years old)
2 "if you love me" chain emails from the same person
3 urban legend chain emails from my brother
4 "patriotic" chain emails from my brother
2 "athiests are ruining our country" chain emails from my brother, who has known for 35 years I'm an athiest
3 "if you love me" chain emails from my step-MIL (including the same two sent by the Web newbie)
1 bogus cancer cure email about some nonexistent kid whose leukemia will miraculously be cured if he collects every email address in the world in the next seven days--sent by my step-MIL
2 chain mail "petitions" to George Bush, both for legislation I wouldn't support if lobotomized--and that we all SHOULD know does not have a chance of working--again, sent by my step-MIL
and
ONE legitimate personal message from a friend who is in the midst of treating her fourth metastasis of breast cancer, to let me know how her day had gone and asking if I wanted to get together the next day.

By the time I got to my friend's communication I had forwarded the spam to my ISP, marked it as spam and deleted it. I had opened no fewer than six new pages per email sent by my brother, only to close them and delete the whole mess, opened the garbage from the newbie and from my step-MIL and been disgusted as I deleted all of it ... and then had to UNDELETE my friend's email because my finger got stuck on the delete button.

I think that night I reached my absolute limit in patience, having come downstairs to check specifically for an email from my buddy before heading upstairs to bed. It had been only two hours since my previous email check.

I don't understand people who think forwarding garbage constitutes being "in touch." Wow. You're really thinking of me. You have me on a presorted electronic list that you click to share stupid stuff to people, without even typing a whole sentence yourself before launching it to your entire address book. @@@

[goblue2539]

I'm sure I still have it in my "Sent Items" folder somewhere, but I warn you it's got "A Scotch-Irish Scorpio with PMS was REALLY ticked off" written all over it.

Well, replace Scotch-Irish with German-English, and it's me anyway.

I check my email at least twice a week.  I usually have anywhere from 20-100 emails.  I get so many duplicates it's not funny anymore.  In fact, that's the one reason I don't mind when other people can see my email address.  I live in the eternal hope that one friend will see that another friend ALREADY sent me that "cute" joke, funny picture, or "Send this to all your friends" crap. 

[Stanwyck]

I hate the people I call "Offenderati".  They are the types that will take any innocuous comment and give excuses for other's behavior based on information not relevant to the discussion:

OP:  I really hate my coworker, she ate MY lunch!  Now I'm starving and I won't be home to eat dinner until 10:00! 
A: Maybe your coworker has a medical condition and she has to eat every 10 minutes or she'll die.  My sister-in-law's cousin's father-in-law's nephew has a condition blah blah blah...
OP: The issue is she took MY lunch!  She should bring her own food!
B: You should be sensitive to those who are ill.  Sometimes medications can effect people's judgment blah, blah....
C: ITA with B.  Why don't you cut her some slack?  Maybe she accidentally took your lunch thinking it was hers....
OP: My coworker is not ill.  She's just a {expletive deleted}!
B: Even {expletive deleted}s should be treated with respect...
{at which point A, B & C start flaming OP for being insensitive}


I also get annoyed by people who always bring up their topic-du-jour in every thread regardless of topic.

OP: What did you think of last night's Awards show?  I'm happy So-And-So won.
A: I can't believe BigBlockbusterMovie won.  LittleMovieNobodySaw was better.
B: LittleMovieNobodySaw didn't win because of {insert Political/Religious group here}
OP: What does IP/RGH have to do with it? 
B: Well, the IP/RGH are the cause of all bad things.
C: {vainly trying to get the thread back on topic} I thought Skinny Actress's dress was pretty.

[T'Mar of Vulcan]

I hate the people I call "Offenderati".  They are the types that will take any innocuous comment and give excuses for other's behavior

This went on a lot on the old forum until someone pointed out that it was getting ridiculous to the point of absurdity. Then it stopped.

Whenever someone mentions something and another person comes up with a medical excuse or something the other person MAY have, I just see red and start twitching. Honestly. I think our culture (Western culture; I'm S.African) is getting excuse-obsessed. People are never at fault for the things they do, it's always the fault of the school system, their mother/father, a medical condition, etc etc yadda yadda ad infinitum. Drives me batty.

[freakyfemme]

I hate the people I call "Offenderati".  They are the types that will take any innocuous comment and give excuses for other's behavior

This went on a lot on the old forum until someone pointed out that it was getting ridiculous to the point of absurdity. Then it stopped.

Yeah, I think it got so bad that I made up a game about it at one point, lol.

[Lysitheia]

 I've said it before and I'll say it again:

I hate it when people post writing of some kind and ask for crit, then whines piteously when no one thinks it as amazing as they do.

I also hate it when someone has an issue or cause of some kind, and everything revolves around the issue, to the point where you want to scream "Yes, yes, you love spinach-- we get it, okay?"

Don't go onto a board where the whole point is specialized interests and try to fake knowledge, then have a temper tantrum like you're three when someone calls BS on you. One of my boards has a large Pagan population, and someone went on and started this, only to have a few beloved, long time posters rip her a new bellybutton.

If you don't like a community, don't take part anymore. Going on and posting about how much you resent X or hate the Y rule is stupid and childish. No one is holding a gun to your head-- you must want to be there.

Finally, disagreements of ideology do not a {perjorative} make. The smartest thing I ever heard online was the rules page of a writing community. Their take on vocal beliefs about non-relevant topics:

Know the difference between the truth ( snow is cold and the sky is blue) and THE TRUTH {sic}
( It is evil and sinful to...)

I don't intend the caps as yelling.