Letting a friendship quietly die... foiled again!

[Cz. Burrito]

That was what I had hoped to do.  My (former) friend Nala and I have grown apart over the last couple of years.  I decided that she was no longer the person that I thought she was.  I could have continued to casually aquaint myself with her from a polite distance were it not for the Great Incident of Internet Journaling. 

The GIoIJ occured shortly before the lease on our apartment was up and we went our separate ways.  Nala declared white women unfit to live with due to their neuroses and passive aggressive behavior and stated very bluntly that she was glad to be rid of them.  She stated this in her journal, which she knows for a fact I read.  I called her on the passive-aggressive posting, and she said that it was okay because she would have said it to my face.

I took this incident as a subtle indication that she did not like me.  I filed Nala under "former friend."  I do not wish to have any contact with her. 

Apparently, she still thinks we're best buddies!     <--That's a sarcastic smile, in case you couldn't tell.  My good friend Mae told me that she received an email out of the blue from Nala saying that she would looooove to see us and that she has Christmas presents for us! 

Dear Ehell, what do I do?!  I do not wish to accept anything from her.  I have no intention of reciprocating.  Do I accept it, write a thank you note, and resume my non-contact policy?

 

[dawbs]

she used a 3rd party to contact you?

I say you ignore it.  And you ask the 3rd party (very nicely and on the hush-hush if possible) to not give Nala your contact info.

[Alida]

Nala doesn't sound at all balanced!

[Verruca]

Don't you remember?  You have other plans that day.  Whatever that day turns out to be. 

And I agree with Dawbs, make sure Mae knows not to give your contact information to Nala - but if Nala does find a way to get that gift to you, even without an in-person meeting - I'd just write a polite thank you note and move on.

[Chocolate Cake]

You haven't been foiled.  Carry on, carry on.

[Cz. Burrito]

she used a 3rd party to contact you?

I say you ignore it.  And you ask the 3rd party (very nicely and on the hush-hush if possible) to not give Nala your contact info.

Critical bit of information I should have shared earlier: I live with Mae.  I do find it a bit odd that Nala hasn't contacted me directly at all in 7 months, yet she bought me a Christmas present.  I plan on avoiding Nala to the extent possible, though. 

[dawbs]

Critical bit of information I should have shared earlier: I live with Mae.  I do find it a bit odd that Nala hasn't contacted me directly at all in 7 months, yet she bought me a Christmas present.  I plan on avoiding Nala to the extent possible, though. 

S...that means she knows how to contact you and instead of being a responsible grown-up and doing so, she is giving cryptic messages to your room-mate in the hope that that will trigger you to contact her?

That doesn't make it better, it just makes her harder to avoid

[Clara Bow]

I've recently dropped a friend for developing racist views (see post) and I think that's what I would say if she asked. I'd tell her that I found her comments about white women extremely offensive and I have no interest in continuing to associate with her. If she doesn't ask, then ignore away.
And if the gift turns up at your house, return to sender is free.

[Dragons 8 Cactus]

I'd ignore her totally.
Friends just don't do what she was writing in a  PA kinda way.

And IF she really was your friend she would have made sure you were OK with everything before disappearing for a while.
Dragons8

[MineralDiva]

I'd simply be unavailable to see her.  No matter what or when, I'd have "other plans, sorry."