Author Topic: Buying someting other than requested  (Read 2950 times)

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wolfie

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Re: Buying someting other than requested
« Reply #45 on: Today at 04:46:08 PM »
*snip*

Buying several bags of the wrong litter has not helped the OP. It has instead created an additional burden. The OP now still has to go out and get the right litter, but now also has to return several bags of the wrong stuff or wastefully throw it out. Meanwhile the cats may poop on the floor.

The OP updated on post #40. Her mom is exchanging the bags. No burden for the OP.

I guess I never saw it as much of a burden myself.  It's her cat, her mom was doing a favor.  The favor fell flat, but ultimately it would still be the OP's responsibility to get cat litter for her own cat.  I'm kind of surprised that people would order their mother back to the store, but maybe it's because I've never had anyone offer to go to the store for me in the first place. I just wouldn't be able to bring myself to tell them to try again.  I'd just exchange it myself and not accept the favor again since it didn't work.

If you are out of litter your choices are have your cat go to the bathroom where you don't want them to, or go get more litter. The OP says she is without a car for a month so it seems like the easiest thing would be to ask her mom to fix the error if she can.

DanaJ

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Re: Buying someting other than requested
« Reply #46 on: Today at 04:50:09 PM »
Burned hands or poop on the floor seems a little OTT. If I am doing someone a favor, I will try to do them the favor. If I fail or misstep, I would hope for compassion/understanding rather than anger. I tried. Maybe, in some cases, we (the asker and I) would both be better off if I didn't try next time.

Oh, I certainly would not be angry with you for doing your best. Not at all. I would appreciate the effort an thank you for taking the time and going out of your way.

I'm sayinging I would make an attempt to check first, since most people provide specific instructions for a specific reason. As stated upthread with the shampoo example, if someone just says "shampoo" that's different than if they request "Specific Brand Shampoo for Dandruff."

BTW - in real life, scented products do burn my skin. If the scent is strong enough, I get blisters. That's why I used it in my example.

The OP's mom checked with her after she'd already made the purchase.

« Last Edit: Today at 05:02:07 PM by DanaJ »

veronaz

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Re: Buying someting other than requested
« Reply #47 on: Today at 04:50:43 PM »
When someone does a shopping errand for me, I’m very specific about the brand, size, flavor, etc.  I write it down, even if they say they’ll remember  I always say “If they don’t have it, call me.”  I might want something different, I might not.

I don’t buy the excuse “At least I tried.”  What that means is you (generic) tried to do my thinking and you tried to make my decisions.  I also don't like it when someone decides to ignore my requests and grabs whatever is on sale because they think it's a better deal.

Yes, cats are finicky.  Some will use only one particular type of litter.  I found that out the hard way.  Few years ago someone gave me a few bags of (a very different type) litter after their cat passed away.  Nice gesture.  But my kitty jumped into her box, jumped out, and sat beside it whining.  I figured out what the problem was.  I put down some newspaper because I was afraid she would do her business on the floor.  Then I ran out and got her regular type of litter.  All was well.  (whew) :)


« Last Edit: Today at 05:04:42 PM by veronaz »

rose red

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Re: Buying someting other than requested
« Reply #48 on: Today at 05:06:29 PM »
*snip*

Buying several bags of the wrong litter has not helped the OP. It has instead created an additional burden. The OP now still has to go out and get the right litter, but now also has to return several bags of the wrong stuff or wastefully throw it out. Meanwhile the cats may poop on the floor.

The OP updated on post #40. Her mom is exchanging the bags. No burden for the OP.

I guess I never saw it as much of a burden myself.  It's her cat, her mom was doing a favor.  The favor fell flat, but ultimately it would still be the OP's responsibility to get cat litter for her own cat.  I'm kind of surprised that people would order their mother back to the store, but maybe it's because I've never had anyone (other than my husband) offer to go to the store for me in the first place. I just wouldn't be able to bring myself to tell them to try again.  I'd just exchange it myself and not accept the favor again since it didn't work.

Heck even with my own husband, we sometimes don't get it right.  If he brings home something that won't work, one of us just picks it up the next time we are out, but I don't make HIM do it specifically just because HE was the one who messed it up.  I don't understand the insistence that OP's mother must be the one to fix this.  It's OP's cat.

I agree with you and think the mom was just trying to help. I was responding to the post that the OP now has a burden when she doesn't. Her mom is taking care of the mistake and the OP is not burdened in any way.

DanaJ

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Re: Buying someting other than requested
« Reply #49 on: Today at 05:13:39 PM »
I guess I never saw it as much of a burden myself.  It's her cat, her mom was doing a favor.  The favor fell flat, but ultimately it would still be the OP's responsibility to get cat litter for her own cat. 

I used the word "burden" because there are only a couple of outcomes possible prior to her mom volunteering to return it (a favor gone wrong can cause additional burdens/inconveniences/thesaurus options for the one in need of a favor):

1) You graciously accept the many bags of litter, because you don't want mom to have to go out of her way yet again. Pay her back what you owe her. You still need to go and buy litter and bring it back by bicycle, plus now have several more bags that you somehow have to return to the store by bike.

2) You graciously accept the many bags of litter, because you don't want mom to have to go out of her way yet again. Pay her back what you owe her. You have to find someplace to store litter until you can find away to get rid of it and hope you caan recoup the cost of what you reimbursed to mom, and then you have to spend more money buying the right litter.

3) You graciously thank mom and ask her to return it.

In cases #1 or #2, the outcome of the "favor" had the opposite effect of its well-meaning intentions. Certainly mom was trying to do the OP a favor to help her, and she can't be faulted for that. I don't think Mom was rude at all, but I can sympathize with the OP that it's really frustrating that her mom checked with her only after she'd paid for it and loaded it into her trunk.

To be fair to Mom, it's unclear from the OP whether Mom was carrying her phone with her at the time of purchase and photographed the litter in the store's parking lot, or if the soonest she could check with the OP was when she got home. If the latter, then she was checking with the OP before going all the way to her place to drop it off.

The OP did say her mom lived in a different area. So if she didn't have her phone with her (and didn't feel comfortable borrowing the pet store's phone), it may have been more convenient for Mom to buy the litter, check with the OP and if everything was good, then great — off to OP's house! If it wasn't, then her plan was to return to the store.
« Last Edit: Today at 05:19:05 PM by DanaJ »

DanaJ

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Re: Buying someting other than requested
« Reply #50 on: Today at 05:17:54 PM »
BTW, to the OP - Our primary mode of transportation is bicycle, we have paniers and routinely carry 15 lbs bags of litter in each. I you get a rear bike rack and a pair of decent paniers, you'd be amazed at how much you can carry.

Surianne

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Re: Buying someting other than requested
« Reply #51 on: Today at 07:59:26 PM »
Glad to hear the update, OP --  it sounds like your mom's thought process wasn't unreasonable, so it's a win all around  :)