Driving Etiquette

[MrsP81]

Oh I hate it when people pass traffic jams on the shoulder! We have a truck inspection station here and people always fly through that because it gets them past a heavey traffic area. It drives me crazy! Sometimes I drive half in my lane and half on the shoulder to prevent people from doing that.

[Betsy]

I spend most of my commute in bumper to bumper traffic on Lake Shore Drive in Chicago.  The cars that drive me crazy are the ones that leave a 2 or 3 car length distance between them and the car in front of them when we aren't even moving.  All this ensures is that all the cars in the lanes on either side of us will merge in front of them, meaning we will remain stopped for even longer.  I understand the point of a safe following distance when you are actually moving, but when you are stopped, it serves no purpose except ensuring that every single car in the other lanes will merge into our lane and we will never, ever move. 

I know it might be annoying in Chicago traffic (which I hear is notoriously bad all the time) but down here our roads get majorily backed up only when one or more lane of traffic is blocked b/c of an accident. Leaving 2 or 3 car lengths between cars is a way to ensure that everyone gets where they are going quicker than if everyone who happened to be in the "right" lane to get by the accident zipped along forcing the people who need to merge with no space to do so. It is a safety thing even in standstill traffic.

actually, the thing to do in a situation like this is NOT to leave 2 or 3 car lengths so that every driver in the 'wrong' lane and his brother cuts in front of you, but to follow at a reasonable distance for the speed you are going, and for the traffic in the open lane to yield every-other-car to the traffic in the blocked lane. It's pretty basic driving ettiquette, but too many people forget it.

It's a viscious cycle b/c a lot of the people who are moving don't want to yeild in fear of a bunch of card forcing their way in front of them, and the people who are in the blocked lane want to force their way in front of the people who DO yeild b/c the 10 cars in front of that car didn't bother to yeild.

Thanks to a LOT of experience in concert driving (what I call the adventure of getting out of a parking lot after a concert or other large event that lets out all at once) I'm pretty good at yeilding just enough for one car. On the same note, if I saw you driving like an idiot 10 miles back, I just might decide that your idiocy trumps my etiquette and not let you merge.

I try to yeild one car at a time but Ive been forced onto the sholder or gestured at because I wont let Mr. My-SUV-can-take-on-your-Civic in when hes already the 7th car forcing their way infront of me, more times than I can count and Id rather not get into an accident with those SUVs, So I leave space for Mr. Im-better-than-you to safely move their big head from one lane to another. Its self-preservation in my tiny car.

[fklwmn]

I spend most of my commute in bumper to bumper traffic on Lake Shore Drive in Chicago.  The cars that drive me crazy are the ones that leave a 2 or 3 car length distance between them and the car in front of them when we aren't even moving.  All this ensures is that all the cars in the lanes on either side of us will merge in front of them, meaning we will remain stopped for even longer.  I understand the point of a safe following distance when you are actually moving, but when you are stopped, it serves no purpose except ensuring that every single car in the other lanes will merge into our lane and we will never, ever move. 

I know it might be annoying in Chicago traffic (which I hear is notoriously bad all the time) but down here our roads get majorily backed up only when one or more lane of traffic is blocked b/c of an accident. Leaving 2 or 3 car lengths between cars is a way to ensure that everyone gets where they are going quicker than if everyone who happened to be in the "right" lane to get by the accident zipped along forcing the people who need to merge with no space to do so. It is a safety thing even in standstill traffic.

actually, the thing to do in a situation like this is NOT to leave 2 or 3 car lengths so that every driver in the 'wrong' lane and his brother cuts in front of you, but to follow at a reasonable distance for the speed you are going, and for the traffic in the open lane to yield every-other-car to the traffic in the blocked lane. It's pretty basic driving ettiquette, but too many people forget it.

It's a viscious cycle b/c a lot of the people who are moving don't want to yeild in fear of a bunch of card forcing their way in front of them, and the people who are in the blocked lane want to force their way in front of the people who DO yeild b/c the 10 cars in front of that car didn't bother to yeild.

Thanks to a LOT of experience in concert driving (what I call the adventure of getting out of a parking lot after a concert or other large event that lets out all at once) I'm pretty good at yeilding just enough for one car. On the same note, if I saw you driving like an idiot 10 miles back, I just might decide that your idiocy trumps my etiquette and not let you merge.

I try to yeild one car at a time but Ive been forced onto the sholder or gestured at because I wont let Mr. My-SUV-can-take-on-your-Civic in when hes already the 7th car forcing their way infront of me, more times than I can count and Id rather not get into an accident with those SUVs, So I leave space for Mr. Im-better-than-you to safely move their big head from one lane to another. Its self-preservation in my tiny car.

Yeah, I guess I'm just stubborn, lol. I have had many SUVs (or GIANT pick up trucks) try to squeeze in on me, but at that rate of speed they are not going to do any real damage to ME, and my car (which is bigger than a civic, but not by much) can be repaired or replaced by their insurance, thank you very much. I'll let one car in, but JUST BARELY, and I'll be right on their bumper as they pass me.

I actually had one woman trying to squeeze in front of me leaving a concert once (there were 3 long lines merging into one lane, she drove up BESIDE my lane all the way to the front, then tried to merge in front of me and I wasn't having it). Whe rolled down her windows and her and her passenger started screaming at me for not yeilding to them. The cops who were helping direct traffic heard her, saw what she was doing and came over and put her in her place telling her that people like her were the reason there was already one accident up ahead of us that was slowing EVERYONE down getting out of there, and then he made her sit there and wait for the line to pass her. Well, I don't know how much of the line, but a lot of it, lol.

[HogwartsAlum]

The OP said that SoCal drivers are the worst - I think that everywhere this is true.  I have seen all the same things here in my city, except the driving on the shoulder thing.  The worst are the red light runners.  They are putting cameras on the red lights, and people are up in arms about it.  I say, well, dingdong, don't run the red light and you have nothing to worry about.  If you don't want a $100 fine and to maybe kill someone, wait your turn.  People fail to realize that when they are in their car, they are NOT private - they are in public.  I can see you picking your nose in there!

Not using turn signals is my pet peeve.  I'm not psychic back here!! Why do you think they put them on the car, doorknob!!??

[VorFemme]

At the risk of boring long-time readers, I will not post the "Was it worth it?" incident that completely removed any possible traces of road rage that may have festered within my soul.  But it was a doozy.  I am just not in that much of a hurry.  If I am, then I get the police or ambulance involved.  Otherwise - I'm just gonna be late.

behindbj

**looks over her bifocals**

Don't bother me none, deary, if its that good a story - tell it again!

My own favorite story involves road rage, a drunk, an idjit, a black kitty cat, a fire truck, and the Fish & Wildlife department - but I have asked the woman with the copyright to pretty-please find the story again and let me post it here.

I printed it out in 2001 to pass around the office (insurance claim adjuster) because there were times when we *needed* a little karmic comedy relief at work.

Reminds me - I need to ask her again if she's found that story.............

[behindbj]

OK - by popular demand...

OK - a couple of you.

Here is the condensed version of my "I will never feel road rage again EVER" story.

Coming home on a very snowy evening (when I still commuted by car), traffic was moving very slowly and very spread out (it was very hard to see - heavy snow).  We were all passed in turn by a large black SUV, flying down the road.  It didn't just stay on the left hand side and pass - it made a point of harassing all of us by speeding up behind us and getting close, the swerving back into the left lane and forward to the next vehicle.

I though nothing of it (after a few colorful phrases), until I was about to round the bend under an overpass to where a couple of freeways merged.  Cars were stopped - and so was the SUV.  I pulled over with the other cars in front on me - cars that I assume had been passed by the jerk.  We apparently all stopped by gliding with our brakes in a careful manner.

From the position of his truck, he apparently missed the cruve, slid off the road, went airborne over the ditch, flipped upside down - and slammed into the bridge abutment.

A few of us stood there in the snow.  Someone had already called the police/ambulance.  One of the other folks in the cars was a paramedic.  He went up to the upside-down truck to see if there was anything he could do.  There wasn't.  It was horrible.  I can still see it:  white snow, black truck, red blood coming out of a smashed window.  And it was so very quiet in the snow. 

As we stood there waiting for the police, the paramedic came to stand beside me.  After a moment, he whispered "Was it worth it?"

The driver killed his very pregnant passenger (carrying his child) and wound up paralyzed from the neck down.

I have determined that it is never, NEVER worth it.

behindbj

[Rei-chan]

WOW.  Just, WOW. 

[Lizmo]

First of all, the story about the Black SUV a few posts above mine...that is amazing, in a freaky, bad way.  I would have nightmares about that.  I don't think that would be worth it either, but my boyfriend seems to think differently.  He's a crazy driver, and it really bothers me. 

-People that see your turn signal and then speed up on purpose so you can't go into their lane.  What is this pre-school??  Did I somehow sign up for some drag race with you by putting my signal on?  Grow the #$%* up and just let me over!!! 

I can't remember the person who posted this, but this is the one that drives me crazy.  I can't STAND that.  It happens to me all the time, and I'm too nice (or frightened) to cut someone off, especially at high speeds, which is what my boyfriend would do. 

And on a side note about concert (or football game) traffic...we were leaving an NFL game earlier in the year, and had a horrible time getting out.  After an hour, wee finally ended up driving up over the curb/grass and merging into the line at a different point.  This was bad on our part, but what happened next just floored me.  Keep in mind, there are cars EVERYWHERE, coming from all sides, all angles...this girl had decided she needed to pee, and instead of going into one of the portapotties she squatted next to a car, so she was blocked from the highway, but was in perfect few of at least 75-100 cars full of people, not to mention the cops directing traffic.  THEN traffic started to move, but girlfriend was still doing her business, so her car was stopped dead in the middle, and noone could move anymore.  Crazy boyfriend of mine pulled up onto the grass, around the car that was stopped, and finally got the heck out of there.  GRR

[behindbj]

It still upsets me to think about.  I sometimes wonder if the woman was in absolute terror the entire time - or if she thought it was fun, too.

As for concerts, sporting events, etc. - I have been known to nap, read, play cards, whatever with my friends while waiting for traffic to clear out.  The way I see it, I can either wait in line with the car running the entire time or wait the same amount of time with the car off, saving gas, and having more of a good time.

But that's me.

behindbj

[Suze]

Oh - my - goodness -- If I had known it was that kind of a memory - I would have never asked for the story. 

Dad used to say that people like that were in a "two minute hurry" and there was nothing in the world that was worth your life to get to two minutes sooner.


I came upon a very bad accident a couple of years ago.  Some sort of car was in the median strip burning (like in the movies, flames everywhere, I couldn't tell what kind of car it was)

If there was anyone in the car there was no hope. 

I drove very slowly past on the birm farthest from the fire, and I could feel the heat through the car even with the air running full blast.

The worst part -- people were STOPPING TO WATCH 
Four cars pulled over in front of me.  I almost hit one of them, due to the heat most people were driving on the far birm to get past, I was following the line when one stopped dead in front of me and got out of their car. 

Way to go people -- cause ANOTHER crash.

[thebadchemist]

I live in Southern California, and there's much that I love about living here, but the one thing I don't love is the bad drivers. I've lived all over the country, and I really do think that SoCal drivers rank among the worst. I see the following driving etiquette violations on a daily basis:

1) Tailgating. Drivers here have it perfected to a fine science. Personally, I don't know how they do it -- I work hard to keep an exact, safe distance between myself and the car in front of me (a looong distance in front of me). People who ride up other car's butts (especially my own) scare the heck out of me.

2) Related to the above is tailgating at night, by SUVs. This really, really annoys the heck out of me. If you're an SUV, please don't ride my butt at night, and flood the interior of my car with your headlights. It's blinding!!! I confess to slowing down, just to annoy them so they'll go around me.

3) Lack of turn signal usage. 'Nuff said. Nobody uses them out here. Well, except for me.

4) People who drive on the shoulder in traffic jams. This makes me so angry. What makes you so special that you get to a) break the law, and b) pass the rest of us law-abiding citizens by driving on the shoulder? This happens in every traffic jam on the freeway, all those self-entitled jerks, zipping along on the shoulder...

Anyone got any others that drive you insane?

Well, I'm in SoCal... grew up in LA, learned how to drive in LA, so I can handle being around the craziest drivers on the planet. My greatest flaw is that my road rage emerges from time to time and it's not pretty. I'm a reformed tailgater, so I can't complain too much about it. I actually leave plenty of braking room in front of me nowadays, but other drivers usually take it as an invitation for them to change lanes.

You're not the only one who uses turn signals. I do, too. But... cocacola35 captured it perfectly. Everyone in my So Cal area (I'm not in LA anymore) decides that a turn signal is a signal to speed up. That's already annoying, but drivers around here really, really, really love to speed up, then PACE you by staying right around your trunk and backdoors. So... I put on my signal as a courtesy and drivers not only speed up, but they actually IMPEDE my efforts to change lanes.

I hate the xenon lights that a lot of SUVs and luxury sedans use nowadays. If they hit my mirrors and reflect into my eyes, it turns into an instant migraine. I don't know why, but those specific lights always give me splitting headaches.

Entitlement is my general gripe about drivers in this area. I was driving along the fast lane and a driver in the next lane ended up behind a big truck (why he didn't change lanes before he had to slow down, I don't know), effectively slowing him down about 30 mph slower than me. He was trying to change lanes, but I was already too close and my only recourse would have been to slam on my brakes. He tried to cut me off, but even he could see that it would have ended very badly. Since there was no one behind me, he could have just waited for me to pass by. Apparently, that wasn't what he believed, because he changes lanes after I passed and promptly flashes his high beams.

On the entitlement note, a lot of people here honk when you're stopped at a Yield sign... with oncoming traffic. I have literally turned around in my seat and gestured at the people behind me. It's not polite, but they're basically demanding that I drive into oncoming traffic so they can arrive at their destination faster. If you're going to ask me to cause a traffic accident, then I'm going to have an unkind reply.

As for shoulder driving... some of the shoulders here are reserved for transit buses during rush hour. BF tells me that, because the buses are using the shoulders clearly marked "Transit Buses Only", some cars feel they can do the same. What's going to happen is that a car is going to use the shoulder, stop when they want to wedge back into traffic, and a huge bus is going to come rolling up behind them. Buses don't have the shortest stopping distance and in a game of chicken between a bus and a car, I don't think many cars will win.

4) People who drive on the shoulder in traffic jams. This makes me so angry. What makes you so special that you get to a) break the law, and b) pass the rest of us law-abiding citizens by driving on the shoulder? This happens in every traffic jam on the freeway, all those self-entitled jerks, zipping along on the shoulder...

I also get angry at the morons that let these jerks cut back into traffic at the front of the line!  That only encourages these self-entitled jerks to do this in the first place.

-People that see your turn signal and then speed up on purpose so you can't go into their lane.  What is this pre-school??  Did I somehow sign up for some drag race with you by putting my signal on?  Grow the #$%* up and just let me over!!!

-People that crawl in the fast lanes.  This can cause accidents and road rage- why oh why can't these people move over into the lanes that are meant for slow moving motorists??  Apparently some of them must have slow minds as well.....

-For pete's sake, turn off your high beams if you are driving on a main street!  I don't like being blinded because it may be hazardous to me and you.

People the crawl in the fast lanes absolutely infuriate me. Sure, call me a typical SoCal driver that demands that people drive faster. But... no one should ever slow down and block the flow of traffic. I was driving to work one morning and a man in a Jeep decides to cut me off and slow to 55 mph. Traffic around him was going at least 70, not to mention the actual speed limit is 65 (this is Southern CA, y'all). We were in the second-fastest lane and there was no reason for him to slow down. Nothing in front of him and he had a fairly new Jeep, so it wasn't car trouble. I ended up passing him and when I did, I noticed that he had a very determined look on his face.

This is a guess, but based on the look on his face and the fact that he held that speed while other cars backed up behind him (I saw him become smaller and smaller in my rearview, with cars darting out behind him), I think he was determined to hold that speed. I honestly believe that he was trying to take a stance... like he was trying to let us all know that he will drive exactly as fast as he wants to, where he wants to. He didn't look scared or uncomfortable... just very, very determined.

Of course, I wonder if that will change when someone, frantically trying to get around him, slams into a car in the next lane.

On concert traffic: BF dragged me out of a Sarah McLachlan concert early (this was when Afterglow came out and I hadn't seen her perform in 7 years) to avoid traffic. He also did this when REM performed at a local music festival and I was waiting for "It's the End of the World". He drags me and our friend out... the next day our friend emails us a headline: "REM performs with surprise guest Eddie Vedder". Guess what song they performed? He's absolutely zealous about avoiding post-concert/game traffic and we're all going to smack him at some point.

Behindbj, I actually teared up when I read your post. How tragic.

Sorry for the long post, folks!

[fklwmn]

On concert traffic: BF dragged me out of a Sarah McLachlan concert early (this was when Afterglow came out and I hadn't seen her perform in 7 years) to avoid traffic. He also did this when REM performed at a local music festival and I was waiting for "It's the End of the World". He drags me and our friend out... the next day our friend emails us a headline: "REM performs with surprise guest Eddie Vedder". Guess what song they performed? He's absolutely zealous about avoiding post-concert/game traffic and we're all going to smack him at some point.

Behindbj, I actually teared up when I read your post. How tragic.

Sorry for the long post, folks!

ha! The Marine would drag me out of concerts early EVERY time if I'd let him. I staunchly refuse to move until the house lights have come up. I mean, come on... you KNOW they save the best stuff for the encore! Despite going to about 35 concerts with me in the past year, last weekend he tried to get me to leave with him when George straight's band exited the stage. Oh no, I told him... not till the lights come on!

He HATES traffic in general, and concert traffic specifically. But I am so used to it that it doesn't bother me, so I just drive home from the shows

[Ki]

I hate the xenon lights that a lot of SUVs and luxury sedans use nowadays. If they hit my mirrors and reflect into my eyes, it turns into an instant migraine. I don't know why, but those specific lights always give me splitting headaches.

I hate those things too!  I'm very light-sensitive (to the point I wear sunglasses or tinted prescription glasses to school or work on occasion), and I get the instant migraine from those too.  I also hate when people forget they've got their high beams on when I'm approaching from the other direction.  Instant blindness, and often on a narrow 2-lane road!

I also always look for an accident up ahead when I see someone weaving in and out of various traffic lanes at high speeds.  I'm a pretty fast speeder myself (5-15 over on the freeway, under 10 over on surface streets under good conditions), but I'll hold myself to traffic flow and stay in the left lane until I need to get over to my exit on the freeway.  I change lanes as little as possible, which I understand is the safe way to do things. 

[Lexophile]

rivka -

People don't use turn signals in my state either (Colorado). Here, if you actually signal that you're going to switch lanes, it will cause the guy in the lane next to you to speed up and shut you out!

I can't stand it when people drive at a snail's pace through a left turn light. There is a safe speed, and there is an unnecessarily slow speed. There are people behind you waiting to turn as well, and that light didn't turn green just for you!