My neighbor

[jfulle5]

I don't understand how the OP can continue to complain about this person entering their home when they refuse to take any actions about it. Lock your door and be a little inconvenienced or keep letting this whacko into your house. What do you expect us to say?
[/quote

I'm not the OP and I wasnt complaining.....JUST MERELY SHARING AN OPINION

[DaeOne]

If someone wants in your house badly enough, they'll get in, regardless if you lock the doors or not.

However, to the OP: I'd contact the police, and lodge a complaint. Good luck.

[sparksals]

I totally agree with you that the NRA stickers can actually be more dangerous.  My dh has always wanted me to learn how to use a gun in order to protect myself.  Being from Canada, I don't have the same feeling.  I am afraid that it would do more harm than good if someone did get into my house.  If a struggle ensued, the person would most likely be far stronger than me and able to get the gun away, thus being able to turn it onto me.  I just see it as being extremely dangerous.   Instead, we have mace and a police baton in the bedside table. 

This just reinforces my theory that any weapon that you can hold in your hand can be taken from you and USED on YOU.

We run into the attitude at SCA events that --

I've just bought this - knife - sword - other sharp pointy thing - so NOBODY can hurt ME, I'll just kill them if they try anything. (yes this is what they say) 

It is a lot harder to kill someone than that.  Crocodile Dundee you are not.

PS - I've been in the SCA tooooo long. I read mace and Police Baton and thought aren't they the same thing --- DUH, dummy --- chemical mace

What is the SCA?

[MineralDiva]

I was confused, Mondrian.  Sparksals pointed that out earlier and I posted an apology.  But the way the thread is structured now, you may have missed it.  So once again, my apologies.  I did mean that for the OP and got confussed.

[Twik]

SCA = Society for Creative Anachronism. Medieval reenactments and suchlike things.

[Coruscation]

Oh, yes we have major boundary issues with FIL all the time. Dh works for him in the family farm. He has never really worked for anyone else except briefly when they argued. Both ILs feel entitled to know any and everthing about our lives. Dh is of course used to this. He usually talks me out of "discussing" it with FIL as I have trouble with assertiveness. I go straight from ultra polite which FIL considers weak to straight out aggressive. This results in a family fight.

DH has gotten better since a few years ago when he wanted three days off work with several months notice and FIL wouldn't give it to him without an explanation. Result: ILs knew all about dh's vasectomy. He will actually keep secrets from them now, as long as they don't suspect one is there and pick away at the subject, in which case he will give in.

Personally, I have gone from making sure I visit at least twice a week and being very friendly to never voluntarily visiting them and sticking to neutral topics of conversation. I have cut my interaction with similarly mannered SIL to twice a year. We have moved since and put a lock on the bedroom door. Having kids has put a halt to daytime snuggling anyway. I am probably known as the DIL who separates them from their grandchildren but they brought it on themselves.

[Sophia]

To everyone who does not lock the door because of their kids going in and out all day. 

You can get a door lock that has buttons for you to enter a code.  You can get in either with a key, or by entering the code.  I think you can change the code at will.  I don't have kids, but I love hardware stores.  I remember thinking, "If I had kids, this would be THE thing to have."  I never could keep up with my key as a kid. 

[MineralDiva]

To everyone who does not lock the door because of their kids going in and out all day. 

You can get a door lock that has buttons for you to enter a code.  You can get in either with a key, or by entering the code.  I think you can change the code at will.  I don't have kids, but I love hardware stores.  I remember thinking, "If I had kids, this would be THE thing to have."  I never could keep up with my key as a kid. 

My house in Chicago had one of those keypads for the garage door.  It was great!

[Sophia]

Instead, I bought the one with a button like cars have.  It was great when I was dating.  No fumbling for the key.  I could either make a quick exit before my date knew what happened, or have my date open the door for me. 

[Gwywnnydd]

To everyone who does not lock the door because of their kids going in and out all day. 

You can get a door lock that has buttons for you to enter a code.  You can get in either with a key, or by entering the code.  I think you can change the code at will. 

If you have one of these, remember to change the code often .

Otherwise, all your kids' friends will know how to get into your house. Which might not be a problem when they're, say, 8, but might be a problem 8 years later. I know a couple of houses I can *still* get into, cause they haven't changed their access code in forever...

[Bijou]

To everyone who does not lock the door because of their kids going in and out all day. 

You can get a door lock that has buttons for you to enter a code.  You can get in either with a key, or by entering the code.  I think you can change the code at will.  I don't have kids, but I love hardware stores.  I remember thinking, "If I had kids, this would be THE thing to have."  I never could keep up with my key as a kid. 

I would worry that someone would need to get into the house in a hurry and had to not only remember the code in a panicky state, but be able to accurately push the buttons and then wait for the door to open (and hopefully the code had not been changed without their prior knowledge.)  I just don't like those things.  We had them at work on the doors that went into the confidential areas,  That wasn't too bad because there were employees all over the place since reception was right there but if there hadn't been employees around I would not have felt very safe about it. 

[mathchick]

I totally agree with you that the NRA stickers can actually be more dangerous.  My dh has always wanted me to learn how to use a gun in order to protect myself.  Being from Canada, I don't have the same feeling.  I am afraid that it would do more harm than good if someone did get into my house.  If a struggle ensued, the person would most likely be far stronger than me and able to get the gun away, thus being able to turn it onto me.  I just see it as being extremely dangerous.   Instead, we have mace and a police baton in the bedside table. 

This just reinforces my theory that any weapon that you can hold in your hand can be taken from you and USED on YOU.

We run into the attitude at SCA events that --

I've just bought this - knife - sword - other sharp pointy thing - so NOBODY can hurt ME, I'll just kill them if they try anything. (yes this is what they say) 

It is a lot harder to kill someone than that.  Crocodile Dundee you are not.

PS - I've been in the SCA tooooo long. I read mace and Police Baton and thought aren't they the same thing --- DUH, dummy --- chemical mace

A gun is fundamentally different from a knife or a sword.  With a knife or a sword you have to get reasonably close to someone to use it defensively (not to mention that many sword are too big to use easily in a house).  Also, you need quite a bit of force to, say, stab someone in the chest and kill them.  More force than most people are prepared to use.  The likelihood of just upsetting someone by using a knife, rather than killing/stopping them is much higher.

One problem that people have with using guns for self-defense is that they use them incorrectly.  You should never point a gun at someone unless you are fully prepared to shoot them immediately.  If you are not willing to kill someone with it, don't get a gun for protection.  If the person does not leave immediately once you've pulled the gun out, then you need to shoot them.  It is when people don't shoot and let the attacker get close that the attacker can take the gun away.

I apologize for going on about this, but guns get a bad reputation as defensive weapons when, in reality, the problem is that people do not use them correctly.

P.S. I was also wondering how big the bedside table was that a mace fit in there.

[Sophia]

To everyone who does not lock the door because of their kids going in and out all day. 

You can get a door lock that has buttons for you to enter a code.  You can get in either with a key, or by entering the code.  I think you can change the code at will.  I don't have kids, but I love hardware stores.  I remember thinking, "If I had kids, this would be THE thing to have."  I never could keep up with my key as a kid. 

I would worry that someone would need to get into the house in a hurry and had to not only remember the code in a panicky state, but be able to accurately push the buttons and then wait for the door to open (and hopefully the code had not been changed without their prior knowledge.)  I just don't like those things.  We had them at work on the doors that went into the confidential areas,  That wasn't too bad because there were employees all over the place since reception was right there but if there hadn't been employees around I would not have felt very safe about it. 

In this case, there was also a place for a key. 
The type I have, that has the keychain button, I am pretty sure it locks itself.  I almost always lock it, but I seem to remember hearing it lock itself once or twice. 

[aloe]

It's true, the earlier comment about, "If someone really wants to get into your house, they will, regardless of locks."

BUT, most crimes are "crimes of opportunity."  Commonly, thieves will bypass the house with secure locks, 'lived-in' lighting or a barking dog for an easier target.

[HogwartsAlum]

If someone wants in your house badly enough, they'll get in, regardless if you lock the doors or not.

This is true, to some extent, but it is also true that a lot of criminals who go into peoples' houses (burglars, rapists, etc) will try doors and go into the one that is NOT locked.  It's much easier and low-risk than trying to pick a lock or jimmy a door.  Also, like the lady who was killed in her kitchen, if he can go in and grab something like a purse or money or something while you are in the back, he might just do that, but if you walked in on him, it could be bad.

Better just to lock the door.  And if you come home and your door is open, DON'T GO IN.  Go to a neighbor's and call police and let them check.