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  • May 01, 2016, 06:33:32 PM

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Author Topic: Your holiday hill to die on.  (Read 489562 times)

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siamesecat2965

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #2100 on: January 10, 2016, 11:20:30 AM »
I am also one of those people that invests emotions, time and energy into gifts.  When I don't get the reciprocal response, while my feelings aren't usually hurt, I understand the let down the crappy gift brings.

If after a couple of tries I am not getting the same thoughtfulness in my gift as I put into the gift I give; I either suggest we stop exchanging or blow it off and continue to invest in the giving process but with less emotion, time and energy.  A gift card for example as opposed to me crocheting a special blanket.

While I understand that Betty P is investing in the gift and her SIL isn't -  at this point it's up to Betty P to decide whether to continue the emotional investment or back off.  And IMO neither is a "wrong" choice.  If she enjoys the thinking, shopping and wrapping while knowing it's not going to be mutual that isn't wrong of her and if she realizes that and chooses to invest less emotion and buy a less thoughtful present that isn't wrong either. 

 

 

Me to; half the fun of giving for me is finding the perfect gift! But with one relative, I've learned to scale back and lower my "expectations" I don't care how much you spend on me, I'd much rather have a $10 gift I love, than $100 worth of things I don't and won't or can't use.

However, once I began to do this with her, her giving got a lot better. For a while anyway. Sigh. I've also realized she is more about quantity than say "quality" or finding something that suits the recipient. She will also ask me for ideas, which I will give her, complete with specifics. And she continually ignores them. Sigh. Usually it doesn't bother me, but my last bday, right before Christmas, was a milestone. So I kind of hoped she might get me something a bit more special, but not necessarily expensive.

Nope. I got a bunch of random items from her favorite store, not one which I particularly care for, and an overload of one thing, of which she gave me something similar last year. So I thanked her, and will try and exchange the one she included a gift receipt with, and quite honestly, when some time has passed, I will try and sell them online, along with the other stuff I'm selling.

Sometimes you just can't win for trying.

Seraphia

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Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #2101 on: March 31, 2016, 01:08:04 PM »
My coworkers in my department aren't much for sweets for the most part.  But the other department in my office?  Can be counted on to polish just about anything off.  So I normally put stuff out for my department on the counter.  Anything left at 3:00 goes to the lunchroom for the other department's afternoon break.  3:30, I go and pick up the empty container.   ;D

Lucky you.  If I leave anything, the container disappears too.

As a female in a male-oriented profession (computer geekness), I'm used to working with vultures.  However, this job has no vultures.  For the most part, if I bring anything in, everybody's on a diet.   There are places I can leave stuff where it'll disappear, but they're not *my* team.  *sob*   It's very difficult for me, who loves to feed people. 
My sunday school class is okay for goodies, but then I have to listen to all of them whining about how they don't need it, it's not on their diet, and how *bad* they're being.   I can live without that.

You may well work in the oddest environment in tech. I have never seen a tech environment where engineers (for the most part) don't regard free food as though they were still starving undergrads. Even if they never starved as undergrads.

I'm also in a tech environment, and sweet things will linger in our break room and in our office for ages.  I think it's partly because our office has a lot of older people who have been seeing the health-related side effects of sitting all day and eating badly.
I'm also a female in a tech environment. The guys in my department are all in their late twenties and still think they're immortal (health-wise). Any childhood/society-induced shame I ever had about being a women who likes food and enjoys diving into cake in front of other people has been utterly flattened. You don't scramble for the cake, you don't get any, and this is really good cake.  ;D

My department sort of ambles out the office for fire alarms, it can empty in under 30 seconds for cake in the break room.

My office is similar. My boss's wife is an *astonishingly* good baker. Like, oughta go into business good. We have monthly birthday sweets (so nobody gets left out of birthday celebrations) and ooooh you better be fast if she makes cheesecake.

She made spice cake cupcakes with rootbeer frosting last time and I -may- have had to use most of my self control not to go back for thirds.
Ancora Imparo - I am still learning