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  • August 29, 2016, 10:53:37 PM

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Author Topic: Your holiday hill to die on.  (Read 548058 times)

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Chez Miriam

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  • Posts: 565
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #2160 on: August 26, 2016, 07:41:04 AM »
Kimblee, despite the painful parts of your story it's lovely on balance. Your dad sounds like a good guy.

Twoferrets wrote this better than I was managing, so I'll just park my POD here...
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well."  - Julian of Norwich

bopper

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  • Posts: 13801
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #2161 on: August 26, 2016, 10:35:07 AM »

But then I said something about not changing anything for Christmas. I said that Santa won't be visiting our house this year, because 1. Baby Girl will be getting all new stuff when she's born in late October or early November, 2. She won't remember ANY of this year anyway, and 3. I don't see the point. She can't open presents, she won't understand anything that's going on, she won't care.


If your MIL is toxic, I would consider not sharing things like this with her...as it is not her business what you are doing in your home anyway.

The only reason to get babies presents at Xmas/dress up for halloween is to take pictures of them to ooh and aah at later. :-)
But that is up to you do what you want to do!

Girlie

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  • Posts: 598
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #2162 on: August 26, 2016, 03:44:23 PM »

But then I said something about not changing anything for Christmas. I said that Santa won't be visiting our house this year, because 1. Baby Girl will be getting all new stuff when she's born in late October or early November, 2. She won't remember ANY of this year anyway, and 3. I don't see the point. She can't open presents, she won't understand anything that's going on, she won't care.


If your MIL is toxic, I would consider not sharing things like this with her...as it is not her business what you are doing in your home anyway.

The only reason to get babies presents at Xmas/dress up for halloween is to take pictures of them to ooh and aah at later. :-)
But that is up to you do what you want to do!

I've thought about it, truthfully. Trouble is that she's not a terrible person by any stretch of the imagination - she can just be...overly opinionated in, you know, everything. Also, she can sometimes act like a brat. HOWEVER, she's been a major player in my life since I was seventeen years old.

Long story short, my family is tiny. Very tiny. I don't even include my siblings in my "family" count because I see/hear from them so rarely. My DH, my mom, my in-laws, our little soon-to-be-bundle-of-joy... That's it.

I don't want my child to grow up with a huge disconnect from the only extended family she's got, like I did. I just want to find a way to maintain my sanity (and my childhood traditions and personal beliefs) in a way that walks a happy medium.

...My main idea this year is to invite the in-laws over for Christmas instead of going to their home. I can serve Christmas breakfast and a nice dinner (of my choosing), without having to worry about wrapping up a two-month-old and moving her around. Christmas at their home always devolves into us watching t.v. anyway, so... It will be a challenge, but I'm willing to fight for it.

Chez Miriam

  • Member
  • Posts: 565
Re: Your holiday hill to die on.
« Reply #2163 on: Today at 12:31:45 PM »

But then I said something about not changing anything for Christmas. I said that Santa won't be visiting our house this year, because 1. Baby Girl will be getting all new stuff when she's born in late October or early November, 2. She won't remember ANY of this year anyway, and 3. I don't see the point. She can't open presents, she won't understand anything that's going on, she won't care.


If your MIL is toxic, I would consider not sharing things like this with her...as it is not her business what you are doing in your home anyway.

The only reason to get babies presents at Xmas/dress up for halloween is to take pictures of them to ooh and aah at later. :-)
But that is up to you do what you want to do!

I've thought about it, truthfully. Trouble is that she's not a terrible person by any stretch of the imagination - she can just be...overly opinionated in, you know, everything. Also, she can sometimes act like a brat. HOWEVER, she's been a major player in my life since I was seventeen years old.

Long story short, my family is tiny. Very tiny. I don't even include my siblings in my "family" count because I see/hear from them so rarely. My DH, my mom, my in-laws, our little soon-to-be-bundle-of-joy... That's it.

I don't want my child to grow up with a huge disconnect from the only extended family she's got, like I did. I just want to find a way to maintain my sanity (and my childhood traditions and personal beliefs) in a way that walks a happy medium.

...My main idea this year is to invite the in-laws over for Christmas instead of going to their home. I can serve Christmas breakfast and a nice dinner (of my choosing), without having to worry about wrapping up a two-month-old and moving her around. Christmas at their home always devolves into us watching t.v. anyway, so... It will be a challenge, but I'm willing to fight for it.

You don't often get the chance to play the 'brand-new baby' card - use it!  ;)

New/enlarged family; new traditions.

I would issue your invites now, Girly; that gives time for any fallout to die down before the real Christmas planning starts in earnest.  If you cheerfully state that you are "not subjecting a newborn to all that moving around, but would love to see them, will they be coming to your home or not?" and become a broken record, you just might succeed...

Good luck with everything!
"All shall be well, and all shall be well, and all manner of thing shall be well."  - Julian of Norwich