Synopsis (if you don't want to read the whole thing): Friend invited herself over, then resisted leaving when I asked her to.
Background: Friend calls Friday afternoon: "We don't want to go to the bar tonight, so how about we come over and play some games? My BF will be home from work about 7, 7:30." I say fine, expecting to see them about 8 or 8:30. I'm simply ignoring that she's inviting herself and BF over - she doesn't have the capacity to entertain, so this is common for her. At 8:30, my phone rings: "OK, BF's on his way here (to her place)". Since this means they won't get to my place until 9:30 at the earliest, I ask if we can reschedule. She says she was planning to meet up with my roommate on Sunday, so I say I'll join up with them then. This works out better in my head anyway, since my roommate has a later sleep schedule and can continue to entertain them after I and DBF go to bed.
Sunday: 3:30, my roommate is getting ready to leave for a different social engagement when she calls him to firm up plans. He says he's on his way out the door, probably back a little after 8 though it might be later, but I'm here. She then calls me, saying she's on her way and her BF is leaving (so will be there in an hour). They arrive, we start playing some games. Around 7, DBF begins preparing dinner. I invite them to eat, which they do - dinner ends about 8. From 8 to 8:30, she's on the phone with a different friend.
At 8:30, she says, "more games?" I state that I'm sorry, but I'm a little tired and still have stuff to do around the house before bed - and I have to be at work in the morning. Roommate isn't home yet. She then calls my roommate to see when he'll be back - he answers about 10:30.
Here's the fun part: Her response? "Well, we can wait here for him and entertain ourselves while you do your chores...unless we're being kiiiicked ouuuuuuuut....." (in a super-sugary voice)
Me: Well, one thing I have to do tonight is go out to the store.
Her: We could stay here while you're gone. I have a key (roommate gave it), I don't know why you wouldn't truuuuust me.
Me: I'm just not comfortable with people being in my apartment while none of the occupants is home. It's not just you, it's everybody. If you want to wait in the area for my roommate, there's a coffee shop and a bar/restaurant on the next street.
Finally, she and BF collected their coats and left. Was I in the wrong at all here? What could I do in the future to make this kind of thing go more smoothly?
I should point out that my roommate has guests, including her, constantly and until all hours, so our mutual friends have come to expect to be entertained into the wee hours (by him) when they come over. This is usually fine with me, as it's him who entertains them, and I can observe my normal bedtime routine. However, I don't think I'm wrong to set my own hours when it's me and not him who's entertaining the guests.