General Etiquette > Family and Children
Babysitting
mbbored:
My sister is 8 years older than me, and we haven't lived near each other for 14 years. Now she's married with 2 toddlers and we live only 4 blocks apart and work for the same company. As I don't have any kids of my own and I live so close, I'm their primary babysitter, which I love. My sister is always thankful, and constantly reminds me that I don't have to sit, as she knows I have a life of my own. Well, a little snafu has arisen and I want to know how to handle it.
Two months ago, my boyfriend bought front row tickets for us to go see a concert a week from today. Two weeks ago, my sister asked me if I was free to babysit for tonight. She had signed herself and her husband up for cooking classes as a Christmas present. I said sure, and wrote it down in my calendar. I bet you can all see where this is all going.
Last night dear BF and I were out to dinner with some friends, when one of them asked if we were excited about the concert for tonight. We said, yes we're excited, but it's next week. Our friend showed us his ticket for tonight's concert, prompting my boyfriend to check ours as well. Of course he had written the date down wrong. I called my sister and explained that we had these tickets for months, but due to a confusion I wasn't aware of the real date until right then. I asked if it was possible for her to find another sitter, and that if it wasn't, I'd be more than happy to sell my ticket and watch her kids.
This morning on the way in to work (we carpool), she informed me that our mother would be coming to watching my niece and nephew, but that she was very disappointed in me. She had given me two weeks notice, and she hated making my mother drive 30 minutes on a week night to watch her kids. I apologized thoroughly, and offered to watch her kids for free this weekend, which she said would go a long way to making up for it. She didn't say anything else about it, but the rest of our conversation in the car was cool and a little bit forced. When we parted ways she said we had to leave early today and to please remember it. Once at work, I got an email from my mother saying she was so excited I had cancelled so she could see her grandkids tonight.
What should I do now? I'm inclined to just drop it, but should I apologize again to my sister? If this had been anybody else I sat for, I think I would have handled it the same way: cancelling only for something important, notifying them immediately and insisting on sitting if nobody else was available. If it was anybody else, I would have also offered to help find another sitter, but I know my sister only trusts one close friend, myself and our mother to watch her kids.
Thanks in advance!
Irish Clovers:
It was an honest mistake and frankly, her kids are not your responsibility. I think originally apologizing for it was enough and you don't need to do it again.
Chocolate Cake:
I think your sister needs to get a grip. It seems that you've spoiled her by your easy availability (does she even pay you?) and now you have a spoiled sister on your hands.
Apologizing was enough. People make mistakes. It happens. She was able to get another sitter just fine. Having to now grovel by offering to sit this weekend (and STILL she was cool to you) is just too much.
I suggest that you make yourself less available to her (like one out of every two or three times she asks) for the next few months until she gets a more grateful attitude.
lolane:
I don't think you need to apologize again. You have already done enough. If your sister brings it up again then I would simply say, "I know you're dissapointed and I'm sorry about that, however, I made a mistake and I've already apologized for it." If she continued on then I would just say, "I've already said what I have to say about this situation, I've moved on and I hope that you will too."
You have not done anything wrong, mistakes happen, and you should not feel guilted into trying to make ammends.
ShadesOfGrey:
--- Quote from: lolane on January 22, 2007, 12:43:32 PM ---I don't think you need to apologize again. You have already done enough. If your sister brings it up again then I would simply say, "I know you're dissapointed and I'm sorry about that, however, I made a mistake and I've already apologized for it." If she continued on then I would just say, "I've already said what I have to say about this situation, I've moved on and I hope that you will too."
You have not done anything wrong, mistakes happen, and you should not feel guilted into trying to make ammends.
--- End quote ---
ITA...you've done plenty, and you dont need to 'make it up' to her by babysitting this weekend, though it was a nice gesture. Mistakes happen, and you were contrite, so the issue should be overwith by now.
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