Stockings again- should my mom get one for my DH?

[Secret]

First of all, let me say that there are 0-Zero toxic issues between my mom and I.  I have the best family in the world.

That being said, I think my mom may be a bit clueless towards my husband.  We've been together at least 7 years, engaged for 18 months and now married 3 months.  First few christmases, he'd come over to celebrate with us and he'd receive a token present. a few years ago, I'd open some of my gifts and see that they would be useful to both of us and say, "Look what mom and dad got us" Despite it only being my name on the tag.  The year after I started telling my mom that any gift that could go to both of us (such as a vacuum etc) she can put both of our names on the tag.  I don't think she did, but now she has started to get my DH more than a token gift. 

However, he doesn't have a stocking to open at our house (I have one at his house).  Do I ask my mom to get one for him?  Do I get one for him and leave it at their house before christmas as a hint to her?
Any ideas?

I am the first child out of my tight knit family to have a SO, so I think this borders on cluelessnes, but I still want to tred lightly.  (MY DH did take my mom's baby away from her to a new city)

[jimithing]

I would ask if she would mind doing it.  It sounds like you have a great relationship with her, so I would approach her.  It sounds like she probably wouldn't have a problem with it, and if needs be, go ahead and buy one to keep at their home.

[megswsu]

If you have a close relationship w/your mom I don't see anything wrong w/asking her about getting a stocking for your DH (or adding his name to yours). You could phrase it like, "hey mom, now that DH and I are married, how about getting him a stocking? I know he'd really love it" with a big smile. 

For me at my dad's, they got DH his own. At my mom's once we were engaged she added his name to mine. It all depends. Either way it was sweet to include him (even though it doesn't sound like your mom is intentionally excluding your DH).

[blarg314]

I would say that your SO should be getting his own stocking - you could offer to help stock it with things that you know he'd like.

In my family, when one of us has become engaged, the fiance/spouse gets added to the rituals at Christmas - either they get their own gift, or it's a joint gift, they get a stocking, they get their own seat at the table, and they're expected to help with the cleanup.

[klm75]

My Parents treat DH and I equally at holidays (though I get a bit more for birthdays).  I am the oldest and only married in my family and live about 5000 km away.  Talk to your Mom about it.  If she doesn't want to do a stocking for your DH then do one yourself for him to open at your family home.

[magdalena]

My parents give me and hubby about the same amount of stuff for Christmas and birthdays, as do his parents. Actually, when we got enganged, my MIL (and my Grandma-in-law) both announced that from then on, I'd be getting "family member amount"  - I'd been given slightly smaller gifts till then. By now, hubby says at times he gets less - like the time I got a whole set of really lovely jewellery "just cause". However, his mom just told him: "Dear, you'd look silly with earrings and these rings are just way too small for you!"

[AbbyW]

MIL and I were just discussing this but about BIL's girlfriend.  She decided that since they are not engaged, MIL will get a stocking but not have girlfriend's name put on it yet.  MIL loves Christmas and everyone, including the dog, gets a stocking.

[mindibrad]

I wouldn't expect a stocking for DH at my mother's house or my father's house.  The one and only time we spent Christmas morning with my whole in-law-family, spouses didn't have stockings.


(WARNING:  IF YOUR CHILD IS READING OVER YOUR SHOULDER, SHOO THEM AWAY)

I guess I see stockings as something for the benefit of little kids to perpetuate the wonderful myth of Santa coming down the chimney.  While many adults still believe in the Christmas Spirit that Santa represents, very very few actually still believe that a Jolly old fat guy delivered the presents

Now that my all of my siblings and sibling-in-laws have children, there are no stockings at my parents house.  Santa only delivers presents to one house per person.  It would be too confusing for him to try to split up my presents/stocking stuffers between my home and my parents home.  Now that I have my own family/home, the only stocking I get is at my house.

[Sharnita]

I am guessing that everyone has a stocking but your DH?

Yes, he should have a stocking.  If he is taking part in a family Christmas tradtion he should really be given a part other than observer.  He is family.

[dawbs]

I'd either offer to provide the stocking or ask about it.

It's such a small token, and it can go a ways in making someone feel incuded.
(and about stockings being for the kids...I'd agree, but if all of the adults still get/open stockings, it wold seem logical to include all of the adults...)