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What can I do with this so-called immature 'new friend'?

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LeoGirlChelsea:
Hello all, I would like to ask for some pieces of wisdom for this matter which has been annoyed me for a month  :(

I met this girl, whom I would call A here about a month ago. We met over a tea a week later, and we hit off well. Even though she and I were in the completely different stage of our lives and have different tastes on almost everything, I thought she's a very nice and funny, though very unhappy about herself, girl. And then, it turned out that she and my fiancée belongs to the same kind of fandom (which I am not very into). Excited, we agreed to meet up again for three (she, my fiancée, and I), and things slightly started going wrong from there.

We met twice as a 'group' (A, by fiancee, and I), and as the time goes, it has become more and more clear that she cannot respect others' tastes and opinions apart from hers. For example, let's say I mainly listen to A kind of music. But she, devoted B kind of music fan, has kept mocking me all over, saying 'I can't believe somebody likes such kind of trashy music! Eww!' all over, after my fiancée said I was a big fan of pop music. Okey, they might not be a world's greatest singers, but I still love A music and she loves her favorite music B, we may not agree or like each other's favorite ones, but what's wrong with that?

I personally don't like her favorite musicians, but I didn't comment on screaming and wouldn’t keep going on and on how horrible they looked (she actually said this kind of thing about my favorite singers), because there's no need for slug-down - especially since we know each other, like, 3 weeks at that time!  But for some reason, she just doesn't 'leave me alone' for the topic, which I believe extremely rude and snobby.

Same thing goes to my fashion - she's very into certain kind of fashion, and she actually said my kind of dress (I love to wear under-knee A-line skirt and crisp cotton shirts, or shirt dress) is 'boring' and 'frumpy' :o HELLOOOOO! If you think so it's OK, I'm not a stylist or anything, but why do you need to say this, in front of your new 'friend'?  Who appointed you to a fashion/music/lifestyle godess? Not me!  ::)  In short, she believes she’s the best-tasted person with the best judgment in the world and other things are just trash.  And since we rarely share what we like, talking about what I like usually lead to her ‘Ewwww…gross!’ kind of comments immediately.   
 
To be honest I was very bored and felt insulted over the meeting (my fiancée and she just kept talking about the fandom, their fan-lives which I really couldn’t relate with, and her occasional ill-speaking about what I like) and honestly, I wouldn't mind cutting the contact with her minimum or zero. But my fiancée is very fond of her (although he admits that she’s very immature and needs help a lot), and is happy to have somebody who can actually talk about what he likes. I think he notices that I’m very p***ed off about her, but he still wants to meet her. I understand that to some extent, but I’m really not keen on keep in touch with her too often, it’s too emotionally draining and I am still angry and hurt about what (and how) she said.

Is it OK to let him know clearly that I am not very happy to keep in touch with her? What can I say to him, ‘Look, I’m really unhappy to see her, so can you meet her by yourself if you want to’? Or should I simply say ‘I’m not going to see her anymore’ and let him decide what to do next? Or should I tell HER something?
   

Lisbeth:
Well, if she gets really snarky to you directly, you can respond directly: "A, I don't make snide comments about the things you like that I don't.  I'd appreciate the same courtesy from you."

And, if you can trust her and your fiance alone together, you can suggest that they meet without you.

But that's as far as I would go.

Hawkwatcher:
Honestly, she sounds like she might be jealous of you.  I do not think that you want your fiancée to be meeting alone with her.  Now, I am not implying that your fiancée cannot be trusted but she might take advantage of the situation to say nasty things about you or she might decide that she has a chance with your fiancée because you are not there. 

Before you two socialize with her you might want to set up some ground rules to deal with her behavior.  If she is rude to you, you and your fiancée leave as soon as possible.  Your fiancée could explain that he finds her behavior toward you insulting.  This way she cannot accuse you have being "too sensitive."  She might also hopefully learn that her behavior could cost her friends.  Good luck.

Shoo:
I don't think you've known her long enough to know whether she can be trusted with your fiance or not.  Sure, you can trust your fiance, but I wouldn't be comfortable with them getting together alone.  If she treats you so poorly to your face, imagine what she might do/say when you're not there.

LeoGirlChelsea:
Wow, thank you very much, everyone!
KeenReader, I made a mental note of the phrase you wrote, thank you! 

Hawkwatcher and Shoo, you are very right - I just don't know whether if she deserves my trust. And judging from her behaviour, I couldn't expect so much from her, I guess.  :( Hawkwatcher, I am going to talk about it with my fiancee. Thank you for your wishing well!

Many thanks
XXX

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