General Etiquette > Life...in general

Neighbors light, should I say something?

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sempronialou:
So here's another situation I'm not sure how to deal with. One of our neighbors behind us has a security light that is shining into our bedroom window.  It was not a problem for the first year or so we've lived in our house.  In fact, we had sheer curtains when we first moved in.  Then we had to take everything down when the new windows were installed.  I hadn't put up the curtains again until I was awoken by a very bright light.  I thought someone was sitting in their driveway with their headlights on possibly dropping off or picking up someone.  Well, this went on for a good hour.  I finally got up to investigate.  No headlights, just one very bright security light above the side door.  I cannot sleep with lights on or lights reflecting in somewhere.  I ended using clothing for makeshift curtains to get through the night. 

The sheers never went back up and I found something much heavier, but not heavy enough to block it out.  Unfortunately it does cut a lot of the daylight even when open.  If I get anything darker or heavier, it'll really cut the light significantly during the day when they're open since my curtain rods aren't very big.  I've not wanted to say anything since I really don't know these neighbors and don't want to become enemies right off the bat by possibly saying something wrong.  I also figure they might tell me to either get blinds, heavier curtains, or wear an eye mask over my eyes.  I am considering blinds in hopes that they might work.  If they don't cut the light out, I don't know what I'll do.  Right now I hang a long, dark towel over the curtain which sort of works in the mean time.  Should I say something to them and if so, what should I say?  I'm very shy, so this would be difficult for me.  I just want it turned towards the street instead of their back yard, but they might have their reasons for having it they way they do.  I'll consider all options.

guihong:
Since you don't know the neighbors well, can you take over a homemade treat of some kind and introduce yourself?  While doing that, work in "by the way, I'm sure you're not aware of this, but your security light shines right into our room.  Is there any way you can turn it just slightly, to cut the glare?"

 I think this is one situation where you have to not be shy.

gui

Virg:
Guihong is right.  Going over and asking them to alter the light a bit to help you out will be fine as long as you're careful to keep it non-confrontational.  If they feel like you're asking a favor instead of demanding compliance, they'll be more likely to work with you.

As for the rest, I suggest a window block.  Get yourself some heavy cardboard or some waferboard, and paint it black.  Put some black foam weatherstripping (the heavy stuff, so it's lightproof) around the edge, and size it so that it fits snugly in the window frame.  Glue a block of foam or wood in each corner for handles or actually mount some cheap handles on it, and you're golden.  Since it's light, you can pull it out whenever you want light through the window, and put it in before you go to bed.

Good luck.  With a bit of care, you may have the start of a good friendship going here.

Virg

VorFemme:
After the moving van left our Georgia house to take most of the furniture (and some of the window treatments) to the house in Texas - I realized that the cellular shades were "light filtering" and not light blocking.  Our neighbor's security light was doing exactly the same thing in the master bedroom and bathroom windows.  

I bought a face mask and started wearing it all night and every night.  It was cheaper than supplemental window treatments - I was getting the house ready to sell - not redecorating!  How bright was it?  I could SEE the wallpaper design in the bathroom quite clearly and tell the difference between the ivory background, navy large pattern, and a smaller dusty rose design intertwined with the navy.

After a few months - I went on a trip to Texas.  Our adult DD came over and turned on all the outside porch and deck lights for security reasons.  She did not spend the night at the house - but was checking on it every couple of days.........

After a couple of nights, I got a phone call from the neighbor asking about turning off the deck light on the corner of the house closest to theirs.  It was shining into her son's window and was keeping him awake.  I told her that I would ask my DD to go by and turn on that one light as soon as possible - but it might be a couple of days due to her work & class schedule.  In the meantime, the face masks at XXXXXX store worked very well for blocking light - as I had discovered since their security light on the side of the house shone into my master bedroom.

She got a very sheepish tone to her voice and explained to me that they had started using the side lights by the garage for their oldest son.  He was working night shift in fast food that year (high school senior).  They were leaving the lights on all night.  After I got back - the kid was turning it off when he got home around midnight.  Which was better than it being on until someone left for work around 7 am.

I'm sure the new owners have done something about additional layers of window treatments by now.......

MadMadge43:
This reminds me of a favorite story. I had a co-worker who was very proper, always dressed well and very-well mannered.

He comes into work on day and tells me a story I still love imagining. He had a few beers and went to bed. Neighbors spotlight was shining in his bedroom window for the umpteenth night. He had had enough, so he got out of bed and went to his backyard and started throwing rocks at the spotlight in his underwear. He was embarrased, but I have never stopped laughing when I think about it.

Light was turned off and never turned on again.

But I am all for talking to the neighbors, it's no different that noise pollution. Just try and be friendly and not demanding. I also find a great approach is to actually invite them into your house so they can see the effect their habbits have on you.

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