Hostesses With The Mostest > Entertaining and Hospitality

Cast him into the flames????

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RedNut has provided this story and we are still shaking our heads about it. 

RedNut's best mate (who shall be named BM for convenience purposes) decided he was going to host a big game playing extravaganza.  He was going to borrow TV's, hook up 4 Xbox 360's and play team games.  He invited 15 people.  Trophies were made, excited conversations were had, dates were tentatively set (before February - Last year of Uni - RedNut is officially becoming a hermit).  No etiquette violations yet.

Then the question of catering arose.  BM decided that every person attending should have to pitch in $20 to cover food and drinks (alcoholic or not).  He notified everyone of this decision.  Now he is surprised that no one wants to come. People he invited include: 2 teenage boys with no jobs, other teenagers who are earning peanuts and for whom $20 is a lot of money and RedNut's cousin who just lost his job. As far as RedNut is concerned (me too!) if you are throwing a big bash for 15 people, the provision of food and non-alcoholic drinks is the responsibilty of the host.  If the guest wants to bring a particular thing, all the better.  But expecting people to pitch in $20 to play games? 

So he has given up all together, because everyone is being "selfish and stupid" for not wanting to fork over the cash.  I am going to have to buy some earplugs, because the whining and sulking is going to start....

Is he being unreasonable and a bad host? Or is everyone else just tightfisted?

Where is this party-as-fundraiser thing coming from?  15 guests @ $20.00 each = $300.00.  That's a lot of snacks and soft drinks!

He can suggest a games get-together/potluck where everyone brings something to share, but that's a whole different thing than charging a fee.

You have my permission to use the pitchfork. LOL

Have you explained to your friend that if he his going to charge for food and drink, he might as well open a restaurant?  For $20 each, his friends could probably have a nice meal with a drink.

Evil Duckie:
You might want to let BM in on a secret. If you decide to host the party you get all the expenses.

If you decide that you can't afford the expenses for the party you have two choices: 1- scale down you plans till you can afford them or 2- cancel the party.

I can almost... ALMOST see his side.

When I was in high school, my friends and I would have tabletop RP gaming sessions (Dungeons and Dragons) with my dad being the Dungeon Master.  Because three of the players lived at our house, the sessions were held there.  We provided snacks and drinks, though people often brought there own.  These sessions lasted through dinner, and we switched off between providing dinner, and having people bring money for pizza... on the order of 2-3 dollars.  That's where it's different.  The money was reasonable for the food provided, and it wasn't a "hosted party" persay, but rather a joint get-together at the most convienient place.

So, I guess I'm saying if it was a regular guy get together, it may not be as bad to ask for a REASONABLE amount of money... but this sounds like a one-time party, which is a whole different situation.


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