Etiquette School is in session! > "I'm afraid that won't be possible."

I think my mom is losing it

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geordicat:
My mom is notorious for giving away things of MINE to other people.  I got this email this morning.

I still have your green afghan that my mom made for you.  She has been wanting to make another one for *Susie* (my sister's daughter, grandma's great grand daughter)  but really canít concentrate to work on anything.  Even a simple granny square.

 

Iím going to wash this one up (smells musty from being stored too long) and wrap it up nice for *Susie.*  If you could write a little something on a card to the affect that you are passing this afghan along to her and either mail it down to me or bring it down to work, Iíd appreciate it.  *sister* is having a really rough time right now as *exhusband* hasnít given her any money towards *Susie's* maintenance in 2.5 months.  Three months in January.  Every little thing extra we can do will be appreciated.

 

Thanks,

 

Mom

Um... NO!!!  Granted, I've forgotten about the afghan, and although green is one of my favorite colors, this is an ugly green, NO!!  That afghan is mine, made for me.  If my mom gives it to "Susie" then *I* don't have one made for ME by grandma!!  Notice how my mom didn't ask me if she could pass it on, or if I would mind, but instead just said she's going to do this.

I wrote back saying "No.  That's mine.  I'm glad you still have it.  I will make "Susie" an afghan or a quilt.  I have lots of fabric scraps.  If you have scraps to donate, that makes it from more family members."

As for the 'no help from exhusband' thing.  hm... I raised my son on my own with zero help from his biological father.  None ever.  I managed.  My mom and sister didn't help me out.  My sister just may have to give up her twice a month manicure AND pedicure and stop buying new outfits with matching shoes every week.  I don't remember the last time I bought something NEW.

I will gladly make an afghan or quilt for "Susie."  I will not give up one that my grandma made for me.  "Susie" already has one afghan I made for her when she was born.

rashea:
Seriously, retrieve anything that you own that is in her house. We saw this not long ago with a poster whose Mom "borrowed" a quilt that belonged to the poster. If you value it, don't leave it at her house unless you have some sort of agreement that she will not be giving things away.

I think it's sweet that you are willing to make Susie a quilt.

ShadesOfGrey:

--- Quote from: rashea on December 17, 2007, 08:28:59 AM ---Seriously, retrieve anything that you own that is in her house. We saw this not long ago with a poster whose Mom "borrowed" a quilt that belonged to the poster. If you value it, don't leave it at her house unless you have some sort of agreement that she will not be giving things away.

I think it's sweet that you are willing to make Susie a quilt.

--- End quote ---

Agreed. If you value it that much, keep it in your home. That's the only way to keep it truly safe. End of story.

Goodluck.

geordicat:

--- Quote from: rashea on December 17, 2007, 08:28:59 AM ---Seriously, retrieve anything that you own that is in her house. We saw this not long ago with a poster whose Mom "borrowed" a quilt that belonged to the poster. If you value it, don't leave it at her house unless you have some sort of agreement that she will not be giving things away.

I think it's sweet that you are willing to make Susie a quilt.

--- End quote ---

In all honestly, I forgot all about this afghan until this email.  I fled from a very bad situation when my son was an infant, and some things got left behind, some things ended up at my mom's.   I don't care so much about the afghan, but just the way my mom says "Oh, I have this special thing of yours that grandma made JUST FOR YOU.  I'm going to give it to someone else. I want you to write a note saying that you are passing it on."

When my mom balks at this, because I will not write that note, I"m going to remind her how she had her eye on a special piece of jewelry that was grandma's, promised to her since she could remember... and grandma gave it to someone else because she felt they were more deserving.  My mom was devastated.  Not over the jewelry, because that's just a thing, but the thought behind it.

ShadesOfGrey:

--- Quote from: geordicat on December 17, 2007, 08:35:55 AM ---
--- Quote from: rashea on December 17, 2007, 08:28:59 AM ---Seriously, retrieve anything that you own that is in her house. We saw this not long ago with a poster whose Mom "borrowed" a quilt that belonged to the poster. If you value it, don't leave it at her house unless you have some sort of agreement that she will not be giving things away.

I think it's sweet that you are willing to make Susie a quilt.

--- End quote ---

In all honestly, I forgot all about this afghan until this email.  I fled from a very bad situation when my son was an infant, and some things got left behind, some things ended up at my mom's.   I don't care so much about the afghan, but just the way my mom says "Oh, I have this special thing of yours that grandma made JUST FOR YOU.  I'm going to give it to someone else. I want you to write a note saying that you are passing it on."

--- End quote ---

I'm not understanding why it's suddenly so important to you, then?  ???

Now that you know about it, and and determined it important to you, I suggest making arrangements to retrieve the quilt asap. 

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