Rude, condescending dentist! Yikes!

[hellgirl]

A few years ago I saw someone about getting my wisdom teeth pulled (my mouth was just too small for them!). He gave me a checkup, told me my wisdom's were the least of my worries, and that I needed about 10 fillings, which would cost about $2000. I know I have bad teeth, and I have every tooth filled at least once. I thing what had happened was my old dentist had been replacing broken fillings when needed and dealing with big things, but leaving the little stuff... which of course just got bigger. I was a student, this was a shock, and I started crying a little and said I'd have to get a second opinion. He was nice about it and explained things well, including treatment plans to stop it happening again, but I amusingly found out later that after that appointment my file said "I don't expect to ever see this person again".

That was the good dentist, that I ended up paying thousands of dollars to getting that work done, and then getting my wisdom's pulled.

The bad dentist was the one I went for a second opinion to. He was in a location with much much lower overheads, he was older, and he'd been doing this a long time. He also had perfect looking teeth.

He told me that I needed *at least* that much work done, and he couldn't do it any cheaper than what I'd been quoted already. He then went on to say that there was no excuse for needing even a single filling and that if I'd looked after my teeth properly (as he did) then I wouldn't be in this position. Basically I felt like a dirty slob who apparently had the worst dental hygeine in the world.

I was even less impressed when I found out a couple of years later that I have a sydrome thing where one of the side effects is a dryer than normal mouth - and a typical result of this is lots of fillings. It was in a discussion about fillings, where I mentioned my ridiculous number of them that someone asked me more questions, ending in recommending  getting tested for this problem - grrrr!

[EvilAlice]

I lucked out recently by happening upon the best dentist ever! His name, honest to goodness, is Dr Powers.

You don't happen to be around Atlanta, do you?  I also have a great dentist with this name.  I went to him once (with no dental insurance) in terrible pain, convinced I was going to have to have an expensive root canal.  Turned out to be a minor gum infection caused from some piece of something sharp cutting into it.  He could have easily told me I needed a very expensive root canal, and I walked out of his office with a treatment plan and antibiotic prescription for a price no more than a routine cleaning.  I have Dentist Issues from having bad dentists in the past and I love that man.  I trust him so much.

For the OP- I can see a dentist or any medical pro having their own ideas about the best way to do things.  They are, after all, the professionals.  However, that's also what second opinions are for- we as patients don't have the expertise, so all we can do is seek the knowledge of the experts.  It's a huge red flag that a dentist would act like this just from you questioning him.  A good one would have encouraged you to get a second opinion, confident that he had told you the right thing.

[Brentwood]

Report him.

Then get a second or even third opinion.

[Sugar Bear]

I had braces for a few years in my teens, and something like that happened with my orthodontist.

My dentist, who I adored, had recommended this orthodontist to a lot of people, including two of my classmates who also went to him.  At first, he was fine and very easy to go to.  After the braces came off I still had to see him and wear this ugly retainer, which I did.  He started telling my parents for no reason that I wasn't following his instructions and that they would have to pay an extra $1000 or he would stop treating me(the braces cost $1200 originally).  My dad told him if he did that he would sue him for everything he had.  He would have too. No one took advantage of my dad.
He dropped it, and after a couple more necessary visits I never went back.

I found out later from my dentist that a lot of people had complained about similar treatment from the orthodontist, and he stopped recommending him.

[twopurringcats]

I reported him to my insurance company, and gave him bad reviews online, where he has ads saying they do "sedation dentistry" (yet, when I asked for nitrous oxide for oral surgery they said they only use novacaine, and don't offer gas at all). So, that was a lie. Also, they say that he is 'warm and caring, catering to cowards", again, a lie. I'm a coward, though I've spent most of my life going to dentists to have teeth filled, etc (my teeth are bad, I know it). He belittled and talked down to me when I'd get scared, as he shoved the novacaine needle in my mouth, and when I still felt pain as he began to drill, he got annoyed and told me that I am the ONLY patient he's had in fifteen years that needed extra novacaine for this procedure. He said, "It won't be pretty, I will have to inject the roof of your mouth with a big needle,and it will hurt". Yeah, this is a caring, and gentle dentist..not! I can see being honest, but not like that, he is too brash and abrupt.

Add to this his endless chitchat as he keeps patients waiting, as he talks about other patients in the other room, while I could overhear. He also made fun of the tooth pulled out of my mouth, to his assistant, who was also unpleasant and unwilling to answer questions. I was insulted at their overly harsh ways of dealing with someone who came to them, in trust, to be treated with respect. The air of hostility in the air this last time was overwhelming. They simply ignored some of my questions, or blew them off, then later when I'd ask again, to finally get an answer, "I told you...". I told him, "No, you didn't tell me, you blew me off when I asked". Then he rolled his eyes and walked away when he realized that he wasn't going to win the disagreement. I kept my cool but showed him that if he wants my hard-earned money, he will answer my questions or I'll go elsewhere (what I told him at the end). Truth is, I'm going elsewhere. Anyone with this much anger has no right having his hands inside my mouth. It's a shame. I feel assaulted mentally. The state of Florida board claimed that they can't do anything about this situation due to they don't go after dentists for rudeness or bad "bedside manner". So, I complained to insurance and will read over tips here, to get further ideas. He moved from Pittsburgh down to Florida, I wonder if he left there due to something he did..will investigate that, too.

[housewife2k]

I lucked out recently by happening upon the best dentist ever! His name, honest to goodness, is Dr Powers.

You don't happen to be around Atlanta, do you?  I also have a great dentist with this name. 

Nope, Minnesota.

[housewife2k]

Evil dentist told me that my teeth were only so crooked because I was too fat!

What the hey?!

His theory was that the fat on my face was causing pressure to my jaw and teeth.  One look at my charts and x-rays would have told him that this was a problem  had when I was young and athletinc and barely at the weight I should have been.

Some people just lake to blame everything on the fat.

[kathrynne]

I reported him to my insurance company, and gave him bad reviews online, where he has ads saying they do "sedation dentistry" (yet, when I asked for nitrous oxide for oral surgery they said they only use novacaine, and don't offer gas at all). So, that was a lie. Also, they say that he is 'warm and caring, catering to cowards", again, a lie. I'm a coward, though I've spent most of my life going to dentists to have teeth filled, etc (my teeth are bad, I know it). He belittled and talked down to me when I'd get scared, as he shoved the novacaine needle in my mouth, and when I still felt pain as he began to drill, he got annoyed and told me that I am the ONLY patient he's had in fifteen years that needed extra novacaine for this procedure. He said, "It won't be pretty, I will have to inject the roof of your mouth with a big needle,and it will hurt". Yeah, this is a caring, and gentle dentist..not! I can see being honest, but not like that, he is too brash and abrupt.

The nerve! Not only do I have extra-sensitive teeth, I'm phobic about dentists. I literally will not open my mouth for more than an exam without gas, period. The second someone pulls out a sharp implement and aims it at my face I had BETTER be stoned out of my gourd, or butt-walking is the least of our worries. I've also been known to need up to three doses of novocaine at times (anything more than that and my best dentist ever warned I could be looking at heart palpitations).

That dentist also warned me to ALWAYS eat just prior to coming for an appointment so my blood sugar would be stable because a drop in blood sugar enhances sensitivity.

Sometimes it takes checking out several dentists to find the right one. I've been laughed at and taunted for demanding gas, but that means nothing more than that I need a new dentist.

Ya done good.

[NEDESAPIO]

I just got back from the dentist today, after having an extraction. Normally, I'd be in physical pain, but right now, I'm emotionally and physically numb after being treated like a lowlife moron by the dentist himself, and the technician! Why? For questioning his "treatment plan" (all sorts of expensive treatments he wants me to do.) He lured me in by being nice the first tooth worked on, but then when I came in for another tooth to be done, he started coming up with elaborate extra costs, etc. I question anything when it comes to add-ons in dentistry, just so I know what is going on before I agree to it. To him, he was angry and insulted that I would dare say no, and not do what I was told. He wanted to do a bunch of other things to my teeth before doing what I wanted, a dental implant to replace the tooth pulled today, near the front of my mouth. I know some things are important, but having a gap near the front of my mouth is up there in importance, too, to me. I told him I will do both, but WILL have the implant put in while doing the other things, just not in the order he wanted. He tried scaring me with all sorts of reasons why I should do everything on the long list of dental expenses first, ignoring my questions. When I stood firm, he blew up and started bellowing at me, accusing me of not listening to HIM! He followed me out, barking at me, for not being pleased with his treatment of me. I am in shock and feel hurt, at the condescending, mean behavior inflicted at me for wanting something done that deviated from what he wanted. I'm the one paying the money, so whether he likes it, my opinion should count.

So, I am never going back to that guy. On my way out, I told the secretary (who heard him - as did everyone else, since he was yelling -  try to chew me out), "If I treated my sales clients like he just treated me, then I would be out of a job. That is not proper treatment of a client." She wanted to schedule more work done on my teeth, yeah, right. Nope, I told her I needed to go and left. Has anyone else been manhandled by their dentist for simply questioning things, yet the doctor didn't want to listen? This blows my mind. I thought they were all respectful and compassionate, guess not.

Still in shock but doing better..
Carolyn

I had an experience very similar to this when I got my wisdom teeth out.  Unfortunately, I was only a teenager then and it didn't occur to me that I could report the dentist.  But it was one of the worst experiences of my life; that dentist was a jerk with no compassion.

Sometimes it seeems as though all the wrong types of people enter the medical profession.

[Alida]

Report him.  Now.  That is TOTALLY inappropriate.

We reported the dentist that pulled a similar stunt with DD a few years ago.  Turned out that dentist was also father to my brother's friend, so I learned more later on that I wish I had known BEFORE scheduling the appointment - Dentist had some serious issues that he let carry over to his work (pediatric dentistry), that included kicking in doors!  What happens when that gets transferred to patients?

[twopurringcats]

I reported him to my insurance company, and gave him bad reviews online, where he has ads saying they do "sedation dentistry" (yet, when I asked for nitrous oxide for oral surgery they said they only use novacaine, and don't offer gas at all). So, that was a lie. Also, they say that he is 'warm and caring, catering to cowards", again, a lie. I'm a coward, though I've spent most of my life going to dentists to have teeth filled, etc (my teeth are bad, I know it). He belittled and talked down to me when I'd get scared, as he shoved the novacaine needle in my mouth, and when I still felt pain as he began to drill, he got annoyed and told me that I am the ONLY patient he's had in fifteen years that needed extra novacaine for this procedure. He said, "It won't be pretty, I will have to inject the roof of your mouth with a big needle,and it will hurt". Yeah, this is a caring, and gentle dentist..not! I can see being honest, but not like that, he is too brash and abrupt.

The nerve! Not only do I have extra-sensitive teeth, I'm phobic about dentists. I literally will not open my mouth for more than an exam without gas, period. The second someone pulls out a sharp implement and aims it at my face I had BETTER be stoned out of my gourd, or butt-walking is the least of our worries. I've also been known to need up to three doses of novocaine at times (anything more than that and my best dentist ever warned I could be looking at heart palpitations).

That dentist also warned me to ALWAYS eat just prior to coming for an appointment so my blood sugar would be stable because a drop in blood sugar enhances sensitivity.

Sometimes it takes checking out several dentists to find the right one. I've been laughed at and taunted for demanding gas, but that means nothing more than that I need a new dentist.

Ya done good.

He had a huge syringe that he used to inject me, without doing what dentists normally do (kind of "hide" it by not waving it in front of your face before using it). He was yapping to his assistant about something, to boot, not really fully putting his whole attention into the big, fat shot he was giving me. That really freaked me out but I was in no position to move, let alone do anything. I quietly handled all of it, and waited as he'd leave the room for a half hour to go work on another patient, and in the end he gave ME grief, wow. He was gone so long the previous visit , taking care of someone else, they had to re-inject novacaine into me, because I said it wore off. They were annoyed with me for that, too. They did a decent job on the tooth, so I overlooked the rudeness at that time. But now, with his following me out and yelling at me for not being grateful and happy with his (incredibly unfriendly and hostile) service, nope, won't be back. I am so scared about going to find another dentist, it was my fault for choosing this guy..chose him from a list on my insurance (yes, I reported him to the insurance company via email but they haven't contacted me back yet about it). My mouth hurts from the extraction yesterday, but I'm not going to call the office to ask for the painkillers and antibiotics he "forgot" to give me. Heck will freeze over first. Will just take the pain on this one and learn from it.

[housewife2k]

  My mouth hurts from the extraction yesterday, but I'm not going to call the office to ask for the painkillers and antibiotics he "forgot" to give me. Heck will freeze over first. Will just take the pain on this one and learn from it.

I suggest contacting your medical doctor for the painkillers and antibiotics, explain to him/her what happened, that you have reported the dentist, but are now in pain. At the very least, you WILL be able to get your antibiotics.

[twopurringcats]

  My mouth hurts from the extraction yesterday, but I'm not going to call the office to ask for the painkillers and antibiotics he "forgot" to give me. Heck will freeze over first. Will just take the pain on this one and learn from it.

I suggest contacting your medical doctor for the painkillers and antibiotics, explain to him/her what happened, that you have reported the dentist, but are now in pain. At the very least, you WILL be able to get your antibiotics.

Good idea, thank you,  my brain is a bit fogged after this dental episode. I haven't been my normal self today at all. To think I paid money for this! I feel numb emotionally, but my jaw hurts. Will talk to the doctor tomorrow.

[Asharah]

Dentist I had been seeing for several years told me I needed some crowns. No surprise, he'd done several crowns for me in the past, and my insurance covered about half of it. But now, I'm given an estimate for gold-based crowns instead of regular metal. It turns out that they have a new policy of only doing gold-based crowns because they're SO MUCH BETTER! YEAH RIGHT! What it is is about $200 more per crown and my insurance company won't cover the extra cost! So I am supposed to throw all that money away because they won't make an exception in their policy for a longtime customer and flatout refuse to give me another choice! The next they heard from me was to send my records to my new dentist!

[twopurringcats]

Dentist I had been seeing for several years told me I needed some crowns. No surprise, he'd done several crowns for me in the past, and my insurance covered about half of it. But now, I'm given an estimate for gold-based crowns instead of regular metal. It turns out that they have a new policy of only doing gold-based crowns because they're SO MUCH BETTER! YEAH RIGHT! What it is is about $200 more per crown and my insurance company won't cover the extra cost! So I am supposed to throw all that money away because they won't make an exception in their policy for a longtime customer and flatout refuse to give me another choice! The next they heard from me was to send my records to my new dentist!

Wow, that's ridiculous. At least this nasty jerk I went to didn't do that to me. I was offered a ceramic or metal (forgot) base crown or for $100 more, porcelain crown (the reason I went to him in the first place, two trips ago, to have a root canal and crown done). He was sooo nice back then. Did a good job on it, despite being mad at me when I needed more novacaine, and leaving me in the chair all day as he also worked on other patients. The work in the end was done right, even if I was in his office for a couple hours (mostly waiting).

Hopefully your next dentist will treat you better than the gold-loving one did. He sounds greedy, wanting to hike the bill up. Mine waited to do that with his treatment plan, yesterday. Had a thousand ideas on all the expensive work done and insisted NOTHING else could be done until the entire list was completed. Yeah, right. I'm taking the list given to me and having another dentist look at it, to see if I truly did need the work. I have lost trust in dentists at this point. What gets me is the scare tactics used to get me to conform to their desires (to make you spend big money in their office). If I can find an ETHICAL, kind dentist, I will be loyal to him forever!