Venty, ranty, blow off the steam posts

[Ehelldame]

There has a marked increase in the number of posts that are not only contain the words "rant/ranty/vent/venty" in the thread title but also consist of nothing more than griping, venting and ranting about a specific situation without the benefit of seeking any application of etiquette. 

I realize that other similar forums are in decline and whose members are coming here but no one should be confused into thinking the Etiquette Hell forum is a substitute for gripefest forums or try to shift the focus of this forum from a productive discussion of etiquette to being a safe haven for venting and ranting.  There is a reason why gripefest forums eventually peter out....the constant dumping of negative ranting slowly brings the quality of the forum down.   

There will be increased moderation in this area because it has gotten too excessive lately. 

[CynthiaBelle]

I rant\vent on here because I feel as if these people are completley removed from the situation and will give me some insight to the situation. Is that okay?

[Ticia]

A vent or a rant usually comes (in forums) with the expectations that no advice or insight is needed. Hence why we don't want those kinds of threads here. Invariably, when someone posts a rant and then are given advice contrary to that which they are seeking (That is, they want to hear: "Go you!" "You're right!" "You're totally justified!") then they get upset and say that it was only a rant/vent and they don't want to hear dissenting opinions. Not necessarily on this forum, but it has happened in the past.

That is the scenario we wish to avoid. It fosters hostility and, frankly, is just plain rude. In my opinion, if anyone feels the need to vent, without wishing to hear about how wrong they are, they should get a blog.

[Scritzy]

There is the "I Need a Hug" folder for when things aren't going well. I've used it quite a lot.

[Wordgeek]

Yes, that's the right place to ask for support.

The main part of the forum is for on-topic (=etiquette-related) discussions.  Everything else goes into the off-topic area.

[Sefie]

Is there a way to make a "vent" board open to people over a certain number of posts?  That way you know they are vested in the board and the members but still have a place where they know they can get an honest opinion/support from other members?

I really like this idea - I've seen it work on another forum where members can only access the marketplace after making x amount of posts.  Could there also be a sticky in the I Need A Hug! sub-forum listing free blogs/journals that people can sign up for (eg: LiveJournal, Wordpress, etc).  EHellions can then post links to their individual journals, and people can choose to add or follow them as they like.

[Brentwood]

Is there a way to make a "vent" board open to people over a certain number of posts?  That way you know they are vested in the board and the members but still have a place where they know they can get an honest opinion/support from other members? 

I would be wary of automatically assuming that everyone over a certain number of posts is "vested" in the board. On one other forum in particular that I have posted on, I have seen trolls sign on, deliberately rack up a large number of posts and a reputation (one of them even going so far as to apply for - and get - a moderatorship), only to come out later as a troll. Attacking from the "inside", as it were.

Most people are not like that, of course. But as Ehelldame once wisely said - post number alone is not a good indicator of credibility.

I think a "vent" board or folder goes completely against the atmosphere TPTB try to foster here.

[DottyG]

Is there a way to make a "vent" board open to people over a certain number of posts?  That way you know they are vested in the board and the members but still have a place where they know they can get an honest opinion/support from other members? 

I would be wary of automatically assuming that everyone over a certain number of posts is "vested" in the board. On one other forum in particular that I have posted on, I have seen trolls sign on, deliberately rack up a large number of posts and a reputation (one of them even going so far as to apply for - and get - a moderatorship), only to come out later as a troll. Attacking from the "inside", as it were.

Most people are not like that, of course. But as Ehelldame once wisely said - post number alone is not a good indicator of credibility.

I think a "vent" board or folder goes completely against the atmosphere TPTB try to foster here.

I have to agree with CathyF on this one.  A venty forum really isn't what the place is about.  And, I think it would be detrimental to what we have here.

[Scritzy]

Add me to that agreement. We all need to blow off steam once in a while, but I don't think a venting/ranting folder is a good idea.

[DottyG]

Although, I would like to vent about that Scritzy person that's on here occasionally.  Can we all have a place to talk about her behind her back?  Because there's a lot I'd like to get off my chest about her.

[Scritzy]

Although, I would like to vent about that Scritzy person that's on here occasionally.  Can we all have a place to talk about her behind her back?  Because there's a lot I'd like to get off my chest about her.

I hear she lives on the West Side of Oz. 

[DottyG]

Although, I would like to vent about that Scritzy person that's on here occasionally.  Can we all have a place to talk about her behind her back?  Because there's a lot I'd like to get off my chest about her.

I hear she lives on the West Side of Oz. 

Well, that DOES explain a lot!

[lamorevincera]

*deep breath*

I will completely abide by any decision that is handed down by the mods here. Them's the rules, and that's that.

However - and not that this matters, but I just wanted to put my opinion in - I can't completely agree with this decision.

Many (most?) of us come into contact with people who repeatedly run rampant over etiquette. And not the "the shrimp fork is the X one on the left" kind of etiquette, the "You're a fellow human being and I'm going to show respect for you" type. The normal human reaction to this kind of treatment is anger, shock, et cetera. And most people need a way to get that out.

The benefits of ranting about etiquette violations here is that it often opens up a discussion - how it could have been more politely handled, what the best way to defend yourself is, et cetera.

I agree that to be overwhelmed by nothing but rants would be bad for the board; but there's got to be a middle ground between letting the ranting overtake the board and putting an edict down that anyone who rants immediately gets a week-long gag.

Maybe modly PMs to individuals who are ranting too much and asking them to take it down a notch, and/or general "OK, guys, let's tone it down" notices to the board in general?

Just my two cents.

[Brentwood]

*deep breath*

I will completely abide by any decision that is handed down by the mods here. Them's the rules, and that's that.

However - and not that this matters, but I just wanted to put my opinion in - I can't completely agree with this decision.

Many (most?) of us come into contact with people who repeatedly run rampant over etiquette. And not the "the shrimp fork is the X one on the left" kind of etiquette, the "You're a fellow human being and I'm going to show respect for you" type. The normal human reaction to this kind of treatment is anger, shock, et cetera. And most people need a way to get that out.

The benefits of ranting about etiquette violations here is that it often opens up a discussion - how it could have been more politely handled, what the best way to defend yourself is, et cetera.

I agree that to be overwhelmed by nothing but rants would be bad for the board; but there's got to be a middle ground between letting the ranting overtake the board and putting an edict down that anyone who rants immediately gets a week-long gag.

Maybe modly PMs to individuals who are ranting too much and asking them to take it down a notch, and/or general "OK, guys, let's tone it down" notices to the board in general?

Just my two cents.

I think it's entirely possible to discuss etiquette violators and slights against ourselves without resorting to "ranting." Ranting by its very nature isn't about discussion, it's simply ranting.

[DottyG]

*deep breath*

I will completely abide by any decision that is handed down by the mods here. Them's the rules, and that's that.

However - and not that this matters, but I just wanted to put my opinion in - I can't completely agree with this decision.

Many (most?) of us come into contact with people who repeatedly run rampant over etiquette. And not the "the shrimp fork is the X one on the left" kind of etiquette, the "You're a fellow human being and I'm going to show respect for you" type. The normal human reaction to this kind of treatment is anger, shock, et cetera. And most people need a way to get that out.

The benefits of ranting about etiquette violations here is that it often opens up a discussion - how it could have been more politely handled, what the best way to defend yourself is, et cetera.

I agree that to be overwhelmed by nothing but rants would be bad for the board; but there's got to be a middle ground between letting the ranting overtake the board and putting an edict down that anyone who rants immediately gets a week-long gag.

Maybe modly PMs to individuals who are ranting too much and asking them to take it down a notch, and/or general "OK, guys, let's tone it down" notices to the board in general?

Just my two cents.

I think you're misunderstanding the rule that's being discussed.

There's, certainly, a time when we "rant" about an etiquette issue out there.  We have emotions, and those emotions are brought forth when we're wronged.

However, what the mods (correct me if I'm wrong) are trying to prevent is a situation where it's ONLY ranting and venting.  A thread where the person isn't rational and open to hearing how to actually address the issue.

There's a distinct different between "ranting because I'm upset about this issue and I'm open to hearing how to handle it better next time" and "I'm just venting, so no one cross me or contridict me, because I don't give a darn what you say - I am just here to yell and scream."

See the difference?  What you've described is valid.  What the mods are trying to prevent is detrimental to the site.