Is This Code For Baby Shower?

[extranormal]

I've been invited to a "welcome the baby into our community" party for a friend's six-month-old. Guests have been asked to bring a prayer, blessing, or wish.

Two questions:

1. Does this sound like a stealth shower? Am I expected to take a conventional gift, as well, do you think? I've already given them a baby gift, when the kid was born, but I don't want to be stingy.

2. Does anybody have any brilliant ideas on the prayer/blessing/wish matter? I'm not religious, so I guess it has to be a wish, and I'm stuck. I considered finding a blessing in my parents' first language, but when I tried the Internet, the best I could find was "Hey, I like your car." Probably not quite what my friend has in mind. And "May you transcend your well meaning but etiquette-challenged family's influence and resist having a College Fund jar at your own kids' birthday parties" probably wouldn't go over too well, either, as much as I do want that one to come true.

[Suze]

Don't know about our first question

But for the second I would pen something along the lines of:

I wish for you more smiles than tears
more joys than woes
Sunny days and Starlite nights
For all the days in your life.

Corny and sappy, and I just dreamed it up off the top of my head.  If you like it use it.

[Chocolate Cake]

Six months old?   That seems a bit late in the game to hold any kind of welcoming party.  I presume that most close friends and neighbors have already seen the baby plenty of times by now.

[Twik]

I believe, from discussions here, that "meet the baby" parties are actually an effort to have a baby party without it being a shower. If they really wanted you to bring presents, they should call it a shower.

[twinkletoes]

OP, I agree with Twik - it's not a shower.  They're trying to get around having a shower by just honestly and truly welcoming the baby.  It sounds sweet.  If I were you, I'd bring a gift (maybe a cute onesie or something like that), but that's me - I can't imagine showing up to a party empty-handed.

With regard to the six month-old baby - did the baby have medical issues?  I've known babies who weren't allowed out of the hospital for the first few months after the birth, and then the parents have to adjust...if that's the case, I can see why they'd have a party now. 

[sbtier]

In another 6 months, they'll be the 1st birthday party.  Do you think they'll find an excuse to have another gift-receiving event at 18 months?  The unmitigated greed of some people...

[lolane]

I really don't think this is a stealth shower. Of course I don't know the history of these people, but if they were grabby it would seem like they'd just have a shower and call it that. Is it the second (or later) baby? If that is the case then maybe they wanted to have a celebration without having a shower which they know would be wrong. Maybe the parents are getting a lot og request to see the child, but they're not up to all of them, so they are plannin gone party for everyone to see the baby at once. While 6 months is a little late, it's not really depending on the parents. Some parents do not like a lot of people around their baby, maybe they just now feel comfortable with having a bunch of different hands on their child.

Only bring a gift if you want, if not bring the wish, I like the one that was posted above. Maybe if you feel like you need to bring a gift, you could have the above poem framed or put on a pillow or something.

[Sterling]

I don't know that 6 months is so bad because my sister didn't want to xpose either of her children to large groups of people for several months after they were born because small babies can get sick easily. I don;t think this is a shower at all but a real meet the baby event.

[artk2002]

This thread is fascinating...  if someone comes here and asks if 2nd showers are ok, they get told "no, but you can have a 'meet the baby' party."  Now, someone comes with a 'meet the baby' party, they're still being accused of doing a gift grab.

[extranormal]

Well, we have some kind of answer.

I got an e-mail this morning reminding everybody about the party. The mom said she's been asked by many people what they can bring, and she swears she wants only a wish or blessing. But if we really want to, we can always contribute to the baby's college fund.

Oy.

Honestly, they're very nice people. They would drop everything to help somebody who needed it. They're just a little clueless about these matters.

[Suze]

I would just bring the wish and "forget" about the college fund

[Freckles]

I agree that it sounds like people have been bugging them to see the baby so they've opted for a get-together.  If it hadn't been called a "Meet The Baby" party then it would just be a party and there would probably be no questions about their motives.

The idea of framing a poem or having something stitched onto a pillow is very nice and just what they're asking for. Don't bring anything else since they've clearly stated that they don't want anything else. Plus it might make others uncomfortable who didn't bring a separate gift.

Don't over analyze. The couple is probably sorry they're doing it now for the questions that have been raised. JMO.

[CynthiaBelle]

I've never heard of a "welcome baby into community party". Sounds a tad bit odd.

However, it's truly up to you.

What'd the invite look like? From first impression, did you think "babyshower"?

Do you know anyone else going, you could call them and try to see what they think about the situation?

[willow2483]

I would probably bring a "hostess" gift (flowers, bottle of wine, etc).  Or, when I was born, someone gave my mom a lamb planter, which she still uses (the orginal plant is loooong dead though, of course). 

As for the wish, there is an old Irish saying, "As you slide down the banister of life, may the splinters always point the wrong way."  :-)  Silly yes, good wishes, definitely!

[MadMadge43]

This thread is fascinating...  if someone comes here and asks if 2nd showers are ok, they get told "no, but you can have a 'meet the baby' party."  Now, someone comes with a 'meet the baby' party, they're still being accused of doing a gift grab.

ArtK2002- POD to the 9th degree. She couldn't say no presents (for some weird etiquette rule that doesn't' make sense) so she said bring well wishes, code if any for no presents please. I'm sure people have been pressing her for what they can bring and she came up with the college fund to appease them. I see her doing nothing wrong here, in fact dong everything right. But of course she still gets flamed. Exactly why I no longer want a wedding.

The only well wish I can think of I used when I gave my then 10 year old niece a suitecase for Christmas. the card said "may all your baggage fit in the overhead compartment". Only one or two of the grownups got it and niece was confused. But I had a good laugh. Probably won't work here.