Cats do NOT respect property

[jais]

If I can't convince him to move on his own, I'm stuck playing "human bulldozer", and trying to push him off.

Blue! I just soaked my keyboard in coffee!  I LOVE that! 

[Sophia]

I discovered there are two types of people after telling people that my cat decided to sleep on my hair.  I have fairly long hair, and I sleep with it over my head.  In the middle of the night I would try to roll over, but there would be a MaineCoon on my hair.  Type A  Already knows I continued to roll over because after all, who would be uncomfortable for a cat?  Type B Already knows I stopped rolling over, because who could disturb their pet? 

[TheaterDiva1]

Try explaining to people that you have trouble keeping the STUFFED cat out of the Christmas tree.

Ummm... okay... please explain that one!

[TheaterDiva1]

I'd love to move my cat, Mikey, out of the way when I come to bed. He takes up the entire bottom half of the mattress, and usually most of the covers.
Sadly, he is sixteen pounds and horribly stubborn. If I can't convince him to move on his own, I'm stuck playing "human bulldozer", and trying to push him off. It has gotten to the point that I have several blankets standing by, so I at least have covers, even if I don't have room on the bed.

My cat's the reason we're saving up for a California king-size bed!  I figure thta way, Leo can have the foot end, and I should still be able to stretch out (I hope)!

[blue2000]

My cat's the reason we're saving up for a California king-size bed!  I figure thta way, Leo can have the foot end, and I should still be able to stretch out (I hope)!

Ha! I thought the same thing, but the cat just moved up when we got the bed. Better luck to you on yours

<snicker> Same with mine! I got a double bed so I would have room for both the cats and me.

And guess what? There is STILL not enough room!

I am convinced that cats just magically expand to fill all the available space.

[kathrynne]

I am convinced that cats just magically expand to fill all the available space.

That's exactly what happens. You'd have more space to yourself sharing your bed with a full-grown St. Bernard than a cat.

[Pixie]

After 26 years of sleeping with a cat between my legs, I have "purr-fected" a system of rolling over without disturbing cat.   Hubby does not know or need this system as the cats sleep no where near him.  Joseph will not even come near the bed unless Daddy is sound asleep.    If Hubby moves, Joseph is back in his cradle.    Jessica, however, is a bed-hog and blanket thief!  Spoiled? Whatever gave you that idea?

[LadyJaneinMD]

My Rita tries to sleep with me, but I'm a rather violent sleeper, and tend to kick her off.  She still manages, sometimes.  However, she LOVES to play in the bed.  Sometimes I get out of bed and there are 2 or 3 mice buried in the sheets and blankets, mice that she brought up to play with and I rolled over onto.  Sometimes she delicately pokes my back with a claw to make me roll over, off her toys.

I have a blue beanie bear that my sister gave me, and she is just fascinated by this bear.  No matter where I put it, she manages to get up there and drag him down all over the floor.  So, a friend of mine gave me a white beanie bear for her own personal toy.  She LOVES her bear!  He travels all over the apartment, often joining us in bed at night. She rolls him over with her paw and picks him up by the back of the neck, and carries him like a kitten.  While she hates all other live animals, I have often wondered what she would do if I got her a kitten of her own. (I just don't want a second cat right now)

Princess Rita weighs 10 lbs, and she rules my life with an iron paw.

[White Dragon]

{St Monica jerks her head upright before it strikes keyboard. Wipes drool off chin. Wonders if it's bad for the skin to bathe in coffee. Tries to google "SFKS - Smash Face on Keyboard Syndrome" but is too tired to find fingers.}

{Yawn!}
Picture this. Our senior pets (I'm not counting the rodents because they have an alibi) consist of a senior cat, an understudy junior cat and an anti-cat (a dog).
The senior cat, Mr Patches, doesn't mind the dog. In fact, he even plays with her on occasion.
The understudy cat, Keira, hates the dog. She thinks the dog is the devil incarnate. This despite the fact that the dog has never, ever even looked at her sideways. Psycho behaviour around the dog is mandatory.

So picture, if you will, my 12yo dd, curled up in the middle of her bed. Hogging one side of the bed is the dog. Staking claim on the other side of the bed is Keira.

Apparently, the need to stake out dd's bed on a nightly basis trumps "psycho anti-dog behaviour" because Kiera didn't start a fight with the dog. This is probably the only behaviour she showed last night which I appreciate.

First, the dog came to us, whining and doing a pee dance. If you think dogs can't do the pee dance, then you've never met my dog.
No problem. Hey, it's only 12:30 am and we're still up. Dh lets her out.

Keira exits dd's bedroom. Dd, needing more bedspace commits the ultimate cat-crime ofclosing the door!. The gloves are now off the paws!

1:00 am - rustle, rustle, meow, meow, scratch, scatch.
Probably just Kiera playing in a box again.
Try to ignore and go to sleep.

1:30 am - cat noises are louder and seem to be coming from my closet. There's a box there. Maybe she got stuck and wants out?
Climb out of bed. Blink in bright light.
Rummage through box of packing at unholy hour in search of cat.
No cat.
Dh comes in with that "What bend have you gone around tonight dear?" look on his face.
I explain I'm trying to rescue a cat.
Dh explains that the cat is on the other side of the wall - playing in a box in the hallway.
Think unkind things about cat. Go back to bed.

2 am (I think - it starts to get blurry at this point).
click-click-click... up and down the hallway.
Apparently we need to trim the dog's nails. They are very noisy on the hardwood when we are not quite asleep.
Dog does laps of the hallway, looking for an open door.
No luck

3 am or so: rustling and meowing, along with a scratching sound persists. This has been going on, at intermittant intervals, for some time, or so my irritated subconscious informs me.
Keira really, really, really wants into dd's room. Failing that, she'll play in the packing paper in the box in the hallway.

3:30 am
Dh wonders if dog is walking up and down the hall because she wants to go potty.
Get up. Let dog out.
Keira still attacking door and box in random rotation.
Dh drags box to living room, out of earshot.
Let dog back in....

Sometime around this time, the animals settled down and so did we - more or less.

This morning, ds complained how "Dad was typing all last night. I kept heard the keyboard clicking!" Eventually, he became convinced that it was his dog, not his father who was to blame.

Oh yeah, I love my pets!

St Monica
SFKS sufferer....

[keelhaulrose]

As I'm reading this thread my cat decides to knock over my ironing board, with all my freshly ironed laundry on it.
The two feline furballs here have also been known to:
- use their claws to puncture holes in freshly bought milk cartons to drink the milk goodness inside
- eat from the skillet, regardless of if it's hot
- sleep on whichever human they prefer at night
- steal articles of clothing to form kitty beds
- eat the dog food
 - torment the crated dog by playing with her tail throgh the crate bars
- sleep kitty cornered (no pun intended) on the bed, and refuse to move for a person who's trying to lay down
- and, last for now, use the newspaper BEFORE the humans have had a chance to read it

But we still love them

[CutebutPsycho]

Dear cat:  Making me do laundry *while dry-heaving* at 6:30 in the morning before work is hardly a positive step towards endearing your furry self to the human.  Just FYI.

Dear human: Your thoughts have been taken into consideration, and promptly DENIED!!! 

[Sophia]

Before I began putting my bedside drink in the nightstand drawer, mine used to deliberately knock the drink on the floor.  This beats that.  Must hide this post from SnotKitty. 

[blue2000]

In a similar vein, although not so gross...

I used to babysit a friends cat who had a very twisted mind. She used to get up on the mantel, and push the china off, then watch it fall and smash on the floor. And go on and do it to the next piece, and the next, till the mantel was clear of china.

But she never picked the sturdy stuff, of course. It was always the stuff that would smash well.

[purchgdss]

Thank you all for Sooooooo justifying my own cat madness........ Tis true... I am not alone.

I had to share....... Let me preface this by saying I have 4 cats..... All long hair... a female calico, a black "mutt", a grey/brown tiger, and an orange persian.  ALL of mine have a facination with liquids.

Last weekend I was re-dying some black clothes I have..... it was my first experiment.  I boiled up the water pot and started liquifying the non-toxic powder dye on the kitchen counter... (here's where I made my mistake)... I turned my back to grab the clothes I'd left on the table to dye.... when I turned back, my orange persian was distinctly black and orange on the lower half of it's body...... I guess my scream startled him because he promptly jumped off the counter leaving black paw prints across my white counters, across the linoleum floor, heading toward the hardwood floors of the rest of the house....... quite a chase ensued where black paw prints were left thru each room as he lead me around to try and grab him to rinse him off.....

Woe to me for PURPOSELY and without his cooperation attempting to wash his paws, legs, belly, tail and face.........

I now have a newly selected color theme for my decorating and I will not be wearing short sleeves or mini skirts for a long time to come I believe.

And I have a perfect halloween cat...... Except that it's February.

[White Dragon]

And I have a perfect halloween cat...... Except that it's February.

And you have the perfect explanation.

{gasp!} "What happened to your cat?"

"She dyed."

St Monica