"Um, thanks for your input."

[PoisonIvy]

Okay, I know my rudeness barometer is on a pretty sensitive setting, but I was pretty annoyed by the following.

I was in a pub last night with a friend having a quick drink before a concert.  Unfortunately she had her bag stolen.  We were sitting in a booth and she had left it on the ledge behind the seat.  (Yes, we know it wasn't the best place to leave it.)  Although she didn't have much of any value inside the bag - the bag itself was probably worth more than its contents - her distress was obvious to the patrons nearby.  A man sitting in the booth behind ours helpfully gave a description of a girl he'd noticed hovering nearby (he'd been sitting with his back to my friend's and though he didn't realize what the girl was up to at the time, he said that he'd felt she was standing way too close).  The pub has CCTV so at least we have a possible description.

What annoyed me was that Mr. Helpful's friend Mr. Boor's kept piping in with constructive (not) opinions like, "Aw, she's makin' a big song and dance about nuthin'.  She's gonna call the police, and in five minutes we'll find the bag down the back of the seat.  Wimmen are always losin' stuff and freakin' out over nuthin'."  Gee, thanks, we'll be sure to ask the police to add that to the incident report.

Two minutes later, Old Drunk Guy (ODG) notices the commotion and shuffles over.  He insists on a full description of what the problem is.  At first we thought he may have seen the suspected thief.  He kept asking, "Where was your bag?" It soon becomes obvious that he's not trying to be helpful, he's just rubbernecking.  By this point my friend was calling the bank to cancel her cards and understandably didn't want to speak to this obviously drunk man. She politely said, "Please excuse me, I am trying to make a phone call."  But ODG wouldn't let up, saying "I am going to ask you one more time: Where. Was. The. Bag?"  Finally, exasperated, my friend said, "It was on the back of my chair."  ODG smiles triumphantly, points his finger at her and says, "THAT'S why your bag got nicked!"

What is it with people who take joy in adding to a complete stranger's distress? 

[Gigi]

They like to feel superior?
They think it makes them look smarter if they play "blame the victim"?
They're just jerks?

[hobish]

Good for your friend for getting on the phone right away & cancelling her cards.

..in ODG's defense though, i have seen a woman freak out about having her purse stolen when it was just misplaced. She'll be a doctor in 5 months, so it's not like she's wifty, either.

Bars don't like having the cops come. It's really bad for business.

Point being, old drunk guy probably wasn't taking joy in making your friend uncomfortable. Maybe he was a regular protecting his hang  out?

...and hanging your purse on the back of a chair in a bar isn't the smartest thing to do, no offense to your friend. Pockets are key.

[PoisonIvy]

Good for your friend for getting on the phone right away & cancelling her cards.

..in ODG's defense though, i have seen a woman freak out about having her purse stolen when it was just misplaced. She'll be a doctor in 5 months, so it's not like she's wifty, either.

That one was actually Mr. Boor. I could understand the "maybe she misplaced it" suggestion - it was my first reaction too - but he kept going on about it with an "All women are scatterbrains" attitude. 

Bars don't like having the cops come. It's really bad for business.

Point being, old drunk guy probably wasn't taking joy in making your friend uncomfortable. Maybe he was a regular protecting his hang  out?

This is London, the cops would never come to investigate something as "minor" as a stolen purse.    But I know what you mean.  I just found it very off that he was standing there wagging his finger at my friend and telling her off like she's an errant child.  He actually got quite aggressive when she was more occupied with cancelling her cards than giving a blow-by-blow description of the situation for the fifth time.  Protecting his watering hole is understandable (not that he looked like he was in need of any more drink), but getting in the face of an obviously distressed young woman clearly wasn't helping the situation either. 

[hobish]

Good for your friend for getting on the phone right away & cancelling her cards.

..in ODG's defense though, i have seen a woman freak out about having her purse stolen when it was just misplaced. She'll be a doctor in 5 months, so it's not like she's wifty, either.

That one was actually Mr. Boor. I could understand the "maybe she misplaced it" suggestion - it was my first reaction too - but he kept going on about it with an "All women are scatterbrains" attitude. 

Bars don't like having the cops come. It's really bad for business.

Point being, old drunk guy probably wasn't taking joy in making your friend uncomfortable. Maybe he was a regular protecting his hang  out?

This is London, the cops would never come to investigate something as "minor" as a stolen purse.    But I know what you mean.  I just found it very off that he was standing there wagging his finger at my friend and telling her off like she's an errant child.  He actually got quite aggressive when she was more occupied with cancelling her cards than giving a blow-by-blow description of the situation for the fifth time.  Protecting his watering hole is understandable (not that he looked like he was in need of any more drink), but getting in the face of an obviously distressed young woman clearly wasn't helping the situation either. 

Eeuw, yah, that's definitely uncalled for.