Author Topic: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?  (Read 16661 times)

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Redneck Gravy

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #15 on: January 31, 2008, 04:33:37 PM »
For me, again, it would depend on the specific item.  I don't really understand why there is an issue with someone asking how much a sweater cost, perhaps they are thinking of buying it as a gift for someone and they want to be sure it fits in their budget before they go shopping for it.

If this person has been a rear-end about this type of discussion that is different.  In other words, if Person A asks about the price of a sweater and then weeks later says they found it for half-price (in a tone that indicates that you paid too much), then I wouldn't be inclined to discuss the price of anything with them again.

But if Person B asks and then says she thinks that will be perfect for her niece, I have no issue with that particular person asking about the price of something else later in life.

For me it depends on the Asker and the item.  Normally, I would not consider it rude to ask me, but I rarely ever ask anyone myself.



bms2000

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #16 on: February 01, 2008, 06:41:07 PM »
I am terrible at remembering numbers (a shameful thing for an engineer to admit - but true) so I often can honestly say "I have no idea whatsoever"

The rest of it, well, I shop at yard sales and rummage sales a lot. So when they say 'where did you get that sweater' I can say "$2 at the Church rummage sale! The people who donate have much better taste than me!"

I guess I never got the taboo about discussing money. I never ask the question, because I truly don't care what something costs, unless I am buying one, in which case I will figure that out myself. I don't get terribly offended when someone asks - I just don't get why anyone would care.

Twik

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #17 on: February 06, 2008, 05:30:16 PM »
I guess I never got the taboo about discussing money. I never ask the question, because I truly don't care what something costs, unless I am buying one, in which case I will figure that out myself. I don't get terribly offended when someone asks - I just don't get why anyone would care.

Let me tell you a story....

When I went to high school, I could never see why people would spend $X for a pair of Levis (the hot jeans at the time), versus $1/4X for a pair of GWGs. So, I bought the cheap jeans, that were just as good and fit just as well.

Many years later, I was talking to my brother about how "those kids today" are so wrapped up in designer labels. I said that I wore my GWGs proudly, and no one thought less of me for it.

My brother smiled sadly, and explained to me that yes, they did. I just didn't realize it. This explained a lot about my teenage social life, I'm afraid.

So, YOU may not care about what the price of your home, car, or clothes says about your social status. But unfortunately, many people do. So, asking "How much did that cost you?" is a coded way of asking "Are you a winner or a loser?" And many people object to clarifying that to satisfy someone else's curiousity.
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Midnight Kitty

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #18 on: February 06, 2008, 06:28:40 PM »
I guess I never got the taboo about discussing money. I never ask the question, because I truly don't care what something costs, unless I am buying one, in which case I will figure that out myself. I don't get terribly offended when someone asks - I just don't get why anyone would care.

Let me tell you a story....

When I went to high school, I could never see why people would spend $X for a pair of Levis (the hot jeans at the time), versus $1/4X for a pair of GWGs. So, I bought the cheap jeans, that were just as good and fit just as well.

Many years later, I was talking to my brother about how "those kids today" are so wrapped up in designer labels. I said that I wore my GWGs proudly, and no one thought less of me for it.

My brother smiled sadly, and explained to me that yes, they did. I just didn't realize it. This explained a lot about my teenage social life, I'm afraid.

So, YOU may not care about what the price of your home, car, or clothes says about your social status. But unfortunately, many people do. So, asking "How much did that cost you?" is a coded way of asking "Are you a winner or a loser?" And many people object to clarifying that to satisfy someone else's curiousity.

I saved a lot of money on clothes by sewing my own in HS.  Your post explains a lot :-[

Now I shop in thrift stores & love getting a great bargain.  I sort of agree with what bms2000 said, "The people who donate have much better taste than me!"  Except, I have good taste, too!  I bought the nice clothes they donated ;)  I'll frequently tell coworkers or friends that I only paid $1 or $3 for this lovely, fully lined silk skirt because they would wonder how I could afford to dress so nicely on my salary and suspect I was dealing ice (methamphetamine) on the side.  (BG - I work for the government.  Everyone knows how much everyone else makes.)
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Ant V

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #19 on: February 16, 2008, 10:26:56 PM »
Honestly if someone is so rude to ask "What did that cost you?", I'm brazen enough to tell a white lie and either jack up the price or down play it.  They are either so jealous I can afford it or jealous that I got such a good deal. 

Kendo_Bunny

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #20 on: March 07, 2008, 03:34:54 AM »
Chiming in very late, but I usually drop prices (or more often, discount percentages) if a friend asks. Then again, I'm a bargain hound, and if I bought something a friend is admiring, then I don't worry about telling them the price. Sometimes I find things for such great deals that I'll call my friends and let them know about a particularly good sale. But calling someone up and saying 'Hey, you know those walking sneakers you were pricing out? Happy Shoe Store has them 40% off today and tomorrow- I can see why you liked them, they're so comfy that I bought a pair too' strikes me as different than 'Hey, I just bought a pair of walking sneakers that were $70! Holiday sale, they're usually so much more expensive!'.

I think it's a little weird to press anyone for an exact dollar amount, unless they're talking about a big sale that's still happening.

jenn

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #21 on: March 09, 2008, 05:41:09 PM »
I don't like discussing prices with people unless they're genuinely trying to get a feel for what a product or service costs.  Those conversations rarely go anywhere constructive.  I've cultivated a reputation for being awful at remembering specific amounts for most anything that didn't require getting a few estimates.

How much did that new tankless hot water heater I just got installed cost?  No problem, the estimates came in between x and y.  I'll happily answer questions on how it works.  I might even be able to fish out the contact info of the contractors for a genuinely interested person. 

How much did my sweater cost?  Oh, gosh, you know how horrible I am with numbers.  It couldn't have been too much or it would still be at the store!  Have you tried the bean dip?

If pressed further, I'll quietly confess to being embarrassed that I have trouble remembering those sorts of things, but offer to take a look through my records for the receipt and get back to them if it's really important.  Nobody has ever asked me to go look it up.  They usually jump to reassure me that it's no problem and they were just curious.

Rivaini

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #22 on: March 10, 2008, 12:30:28 PM »
I wasn't certain if I was being too sensitive, since my DF volunteers to everyone what he paid for anything.

Meh, you feel the way you feel. Come to think of it, I'm probably weird in that I'm like your DF... I volunteer information without even being asked.

"I love your coat!"
"Thank you, I love it too! Target. $49."

I've never thought of it as rude, but I guess it could be! Though I will say that I'm never bragging about how much I spend - I don't own anything expensive (except my wedding dress). In fact, 99% of the time my response is "Target. $x." I don't really know why I do that. I guess I'm just saying "Hey, if you like it that much you can get it here, and it wasn't terribly expensive!"
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amanda_tlg

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #23 on: March 10, 2008, 12:41:10 PM »
Time for Amanda's Patented Cocktail Party Response:

Acknowledge, Respond & Redirect

Hey, I love that sweater?

Why, thank you. I just had to get it.

How much did you pay?

I really don't remember. Speaking of clothes, I love your ______

Trust me, ARR works for everything you don't really want to answer. Especially if you redirect it back at them. No one likes to admit it, but everyone likes to talk about themselves.  ;)

Country_Wife

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #24 on: March 22, 2008, 02:14:39 PM »
And how about *house prices*, for Pete's sake? When I moved into my current home a few years ago, many of my new neighbours asked what I paid for my house. My response was to cringe and say, " I forget; the experience was so traumatic that I've completely blocked the price out." And it was the gospel truth!

(Yes, there was a substantial gap between when we signed the sale documents and our occupation date, and yes, the former owner--and his mother!! and their realtor, who ended up getting sanctioned by the local real estate board for what he did in the sale--did make the whole experience a nightmare from start to finish. But we're happy now.)
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Beaner

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #25 on: April 03, 2008, 12:09:16 PM »
And how about *house prices*, for Pete's sake? When I moved into my current home a few years ago, many of my new neighbours asked what I paid for my house. My response was to cringe and say, " I forget; the experience was so traumatic that I've completely blocked the price out." And it was the gospel truth!

I wish I'd thought of this response when I was cornered by a friend.  We had a terrible buying experience as well.

I was out walking with two friends and the topic turned toward houses and moving, etc.  One friend turned to me and said "I forget, how much was your house again?"  I was totally stunned and just blurted out the price.  Friend nodded and hmmed and the conversation moved on.  But I have NEVER disclosed the price of our house to anyone, let alone this friend.  And the way that she phrased it was just so forward I felt cornered.

I've rationalized that the information is available on the internet so anyone can see if they want but I still feel kinda dazed about it.

Country_Wife

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #26 on: April 04, 2008, 01:15:42 AM »
It just occurred to me that this is a kind of "bean dip" response, because you're likely to be asked "oh, what kind of problems did you have?" Then you can talk about the bean-dipping realtor, the bean-dip owner, and the whole bean dip experience. But NOT the price.
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MineralDiva

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #27 on: September 03, 2008, 01:32:08 PM »
It's really not polite to ask, but if I happen to be shopping for something similar, I might ask anyway on that basis.  And I don't necessarily mind if someone else in the same position asks me.  However, if I feel they're just being nosy for no good reason, I won't give them any info.

doogiej

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #28 on: September 10, 2008, 11:21:24 AM »
My father's family does this all the time.  They ask how much clothes, furniture, vehicles, houses, etc. cost.  They also have asked me how much my mother (parents are divorced and I have no idea how much she makes, it's none of my buisness) and my dh make.  They rarely get the answer they are looking for from me.  My standard response is "I don't really remember, but I've seen it at XY&Z stores", although for asking about income it's usually "Enough to pay the bills and have some fun after"

As for your conversation, I would probably try to bean dip right after saying thank you. 


lgreen

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Re: What does etiquette say of discussing prices?
« Reply #29 on: October 21, 2008, 05:10:59 PM »
hello all,
I think it is okay if it is someone you know well. I don't normally say what I paid for larger ticket items though. It almost makes one feel they are assessing your value or your taste, is that how you feel?

Then if you want to be paranoid, you may even wonder if they are casing what you own-----or something.


« Last Edit: October 23, 2008, 12:41:59 AM by cass2591 »