Things That Sound Dirty But Aren't

[greencat]

I have to admit I about went into a laughing fit when a guy I was already exchanging Scrabble tiles with ACTUALLY asked me to play Scrabble-the-board-game with him...

[Diane AKA Traska]

In a livestream someone mentioned scrabble the game and i immediately thought of ehell.... does this make me a horrible person?

No, it just means that you have been assimilated.
Welcome to the collective.

Resistance is futile.

Unless you're a Caeliar.  For simplicity's sake, you may use that to refer to them in the singular, plural, or as an adjective.

::Watches as no one gets that::

[Mental Magpie]

I have to admit I about went into a laughing fit when a guy I was already exchanging Scrabble tiles with ACTUALLY asked me to play Scrabble-the-board-game with him...

I would have; I don't think I would have been able to not laugh.  I think I may have to ask Dark Boyfriend if he wants to play scrabble-the-board-game with me now.



Traska...oh, I get it 

[VorFemme]

One of the bridesmaids showed up at the site for DD's wedding to help inflate balloons - wearing a t-shirt that said "I'm here about the blow job!"

Maternal grandfather and officiant (aka the preacher) was NOT happy with her choice of clothing....my dad can be a little bit....prudish at times.  She did change clothes shortly there after - thankfully.

[Thipu1]

Back in College there was a Professor who was notorious for pop quizes that the liked to call 'Quizzicals'. We were leaving class after a particular brutal one and a classmate announced, 'If that's what he calls a quizzacle I don't want to see what he calls a ... '

well, you can figure that one out. 

[greencat]

My high school upper level math/science teacher told more or less the same story - I wonder if he had the same professor?

He spent a class period appending "ness" to the end of as many words as possible.

Alas, he arrived at the sentence "This material is vital to your ready-ness* for "AP-ness..."  He kept TRYING to teach the class after that, but as he was lecturing on the static-electric properties of rubbing an infinitely long rod with pith balls...we couldn't hear him over the laughter.

*Because readiness is a word, but the emphasis on the suffix is important.

[Julia Mercer]

I was just playing Jeopardy on Facebook just now, and  one of the questions was about lakes, so of course I thought of you all, and this thread when I saw that one of the choices was Lake Titicaca, (and I was snickering like a schoolboy as well, lol)

[Diane AKA Traska]

I was just playing Jeopardy on Facebook just now, and  one of the questions was about lakes, so of course I thought of you all, and this thread when I saw that one of the choices was Lake Titicaca, (and I was snickering like a schoolboy as well, lol)

~Lake Titicaca, oh Lake Titicaca
Why do we sing of your fame?
Lake Titicaca, oh Lake Titicaca
We just like saying your name!~

[Luci45]

I was just playing Jeopardy on Facebook just now, and  one of the questions was about lakes, so of course I thought of you all, and this thread when I saw that one of the choices was Lake Titicaca, (and I was snickering like a schoolboy as well, lol)

~Lake Titicaca, oh Lake Titicaca
Why do we sing of your fame?
Lake Titicaca, oh Lake Titicaca
We just like saying your name!~

To La Cucaracha? It almost works.

[Diane AKA Traska]

I was just playing Jeopardy on Facebook just now, and  one of the questions was about lakes, so of course I thought of you all, and this thread when I saw that one of the choices was Lake Titicaca, (and I was snickering like a schoolboy as well, lol)

~Lake Titicaca, oh Lake Titicaca
Why do we sing of your fame?
Lake Titicaca, oh Lake Titicaca
We just like saying your name!~

To La Cucaracha? It almost works.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RJxdL0pH9pw
 

[White Dragon]

Mr. Dragon is scrolling through the channel guide, looking for something to watch.

I glanced up from reading EHell  to see a channel offering 'French Open Tennis.
I know its perfectly innocent, but just sounded...wrong...

[Piratelvr1121]

I had to laugh watching Ellen once. Someone had sent in a photo of their tv, showing the description of a show on the NatGeo channel.   The name of the program was "The Hunt For Lincoln's Assassin" but they had cut off the "-assin" part, making it sound like a pron movie name.

[zyrs]

For the record, these were technical terms one place I worked:

virgin         = brand-spanking-new-never-before-melted vinyl
s(c)rew     = the machine used to melt the vinyl
su(c)king   = vinyl that is not holding the shape of the form correctly, collapsing the part onto itself, usually because the extrusion s(c)rew is running too fast and the material is overheating
blo(w)ing  = the material running through the forms too thin and holes are forming, usually because not enough material is being loaded into the extrusion s(c)rew from the hopper

You can imagine the sentences relaying various problems caused. 

[parrot_girl]

One from last weekend, me on the phone to my sister:
Me: "yep, we had a super time at the zoo! I paid an extra $10 and Princess Parrot and I had a Magic Moment with a wombat!"
sister: "...sounds nice... um, just what did that entail?"
Me: "hee hee hee."

For the record, it entailed a fifteen minute visit in the wombat enclosure, listening to the keeper talk about the care and feeding of wombats, while patting one that was bumbling around our feet trying to munch our shoelaces.

[Lillie82]

Next week I am going to see the musical theater show called, "The Best Little [House filled with women who get paid to play scrabble] in Texas."

And I realized that I have to be careful how I say that. How does that first sentence of my post sound if I take out "the musical theater show called"? Or worse, if I also take out the "see"? Or "in Texas"?

Or if I shorten the title down to "Best Little [House filled with women who get paid to play scrabble" and use that as shorthand, for example, in a daily planner?