Things That Sound Dirty But Aren't

[mmswm]

One of the other forums I read and post at is a site for truck drivers.  Recently there's been a lot of weather related discussions due to the interesting weather across the country.  In the middle of one of these discussions, one of the guys says:

"I'd rather have 19 and dry than 30 and sloppy any day".

Ummm, yeah.  We've been busting his chops over that one all day now.

[Piratelvr1121]

Heard from the other room:

"Ohhhh YEAH!! OHHH that feels GOOD! Awww YEAH!! OOH YES! AWWWWWWWWW yeahhhhhhhh!"

The source? My middle child (11).  The reason? Oldest child (nearly 13) had Littlest Pirate walking on Middle Pirate's back as he laid on the floor.

[mmswm]

Talking about my dog and the fact that he barks at everybody who comes to the house with a "Hi, I'm the big dog in charge, so don't mess with my family" tone, and the fact that I have one male friend who he never barked at.

My 11 year old pipes up, "Well maybe Baxter smelled <friend> on you before so he recognized him the first time he met him."

This would be totally innocent on his part, especially considering he was unaware that <friend> and I haven't always had a purely platonic friendship.  A different friend was in the kitchen at the time and just looked at me and we both busted out laughing.  My child could not figure out what was so funny.  We didn't enlighten him.

[Esther_bunny]

Me (female) too a fellow cosmetology student (male) while I was washing his hair: You want me to blow you?
 ( meaning blow dry his hair)

Didnt even phase us for a few seconds.