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  • February 21, 2017, 07:57:16 PM

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Author Topic: It worked out better in the end....  (Read 909 times)

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It worked out better in the end....
« on: January 10, 2017, 02:54:50 PM »
The third letter in this Miss Manners was about a hostess who asked a couple for a dinner party. The couple did not respond to 2 attempts to get an RSVP so the hostess assumed they weren't attending and invited another couple. The first couple contacted her within 24 hours of the party to say they were planning to attend but she informed them that they were no longer expected.

The story reminded me of an instance where one couple's bad manners ended up turning into a good thing. Years ago a new family had moved into our neighborhood and had kids close to our kid's age. I'd met the mom at the neighborhood pool a few times, really liked her and we decided we'd invite them to dinner. I also included two other neighbors we socialized with and everyone was committed a full week in advance. That morning I get a call from the wife saying her husband was tired from business travel and they would be begging off. Slightly irritated, we decided to make the best of it. There was another family who's kids were also in my kid's classes and though I'd only met the mom a couple of times I decided to call them up because I had wanted to get to know them better. I apologized for the late notice but asked if they'd be available. They readily accepted. About 4pm that afternoon I get a call from the wife of the original couple saying her DH was feeling more up to a night out and they'd join us after all. I apologized but said we'd already filled there spot.

The stand in couple joined us that night, we had a fabulous time, and they became an integral part of our social circle. Their youngest and my son became best friends and I still view her as one of my most intimate friends. 15 plus years later I still think of that as one of our most successful dinner parties (even with a house full of 9 kids between the ages of 5 and 8... kids were always invited but we fed them first and then they headed to other rooms to hang out). 

We never did socialize with the other couple. One of the guys who was attending said he met the husband at the golf course that afternoon and said something along the lines of "I think we're both attending dinner with the Hmmmm family tonight." He's response was he had no idea that they'd be there but didn't say they'd already beg off. I think the husband had decided we weren't "posh" enough to socialize with because we weren't members of "the club" but once he found out other couples from "the club" would be there he wanted to attend. Or else he realized we'd learn he wasn't so tired he couldn't play 18 rounds of golf and then spend a good portion of the afternoon at the 19th hole.

Anyone else have similar stories?

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Re: It worked out better in the end....
« Reply #1 on: January 10, 2017, 04:07:45 PM »
Years ago I was supposed to go on a vacation with two of my girl friends. We were all teachers and worked a lot so I was really looking forward to the trip. One of the friends said she had secured the transportation when she actually hadn't and then prices went up and we could not go. I was really disappointed as it would have been the first big vacation I was ever going to go on. I still had the time off from work so another friend invited me to go on a more low-key, closer trip with her and... I met my husband on that trip. So even though I was very disappointed about initially missing my first bug vacation, I'm so glad I didn't go.


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Re: It worked out better in the end....
« Reply #2 on: January 10, 2017, 04:24:55 PM »
Something like that happened with my very first dinner party.   I didn't meet a new friend, but we did get a good story out of it.  My 'friends' called out late enough that I'd put makeup on.  If you knew me. you'd know that was a big deal.  It would have been AFTER they should have left.  I called my parents all upset.  They said that they hadn't eaten yet.  I asked if they'd like to come over.  We still laugh at how quickly Dad said that Mom moved.  They were over in record time.   The dinner was some Italian recipe of meat cooked for many hours in a big pot with red wine and other stuff.  Being nervous, I'd bought a nicer cut of meat then required.  We had a nice evening and played cards.  I would have totally moped all evening, and had a horrible memory if it weren't for my parents. 
The 'friends' and I didn't socialize anymore.   I wasn't interested in Amway, so they weren't interested in me.  You know why I wasn't interested in them. 


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Re: It worked out better in the end....
« Reply #3 on: January 11, 2017, 01:41:58 AM »
I did college later than most of my classmates. One friend that I made came over with her toddler and was talking about asking her husband's aunt to watch their son. This would mean that aunt took a day off of work. I said that I didn't have classes that day and if she trusted me, I would watch him. She had been looking at the pictures on my wall and realized that we knew a lot of the same people. She had gone to the same middle school as my son; she was a year behind him. She then realized that the parent of one of her friend's was a close friend of mine. (I think she may have asked my friend about me.)

So I watched her son. We became even closer because she knew that I would help her with things. And she does a lot for me.

I'm also the Godmother to all three of her children.

I think it worked out better that I watched her son that day. And, so does she!


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Re: It worked out better in the end....
« Reply #4 on: January 11, 2017, 07:53:10 AM »
That's such a nice story