I'll just have dessert...would this be rude?

[Spring Water on Sundays]

Thanks everyone. We ended up at another friend's apartment ordering pizza so next time, I'll be able to make use of all of your good advice 

[Spring Water on Sundays]

I think it's perfectly OK to do what you are suggesting. I like to socialize but it costs a lot of money. I am paying back a huge student loan and trying to get my business going, and I think even my friends who know I'm broke don't really understand just how broke. I pick and choose which social events I really want to attend, and if it's in a restaurant in a casual setting I sometimes eat ahead of time and then just order a small appetizer and a drink.

Incidentally, I started writing down every single personal expenditure and was amazed how much goes to a cup of coffee here, a chocolate bar or muffin there, SMALL things. So now I don't buy ANY of that stuff....I'd rather spend that money on an enjoyable dinner with friends. Now that I'm out of the habit of buying snack food when I'm out and about or at work, and other items I don't need, I'll betcha when money starts coming in I'll still live that way.

But, how do you get around that?  On any typical day, I'll find myself in dire need of a healthy snack or a caffeine fix to get me through my next rehearsal or whatever. 

I keep granola bars, bags of instant oatmeal, plain almonds, dried apples and other healthy snacks in my desk at work. Do you carry a purse or backpack? Buy a big box of granola bars/dried fruit/canned soda etc. and keep some with you for between classes.

[Deetee]

You already got good advice and it seemed to not matter this time anyhow, but I think sharing an appetizer is a perfect solution. It's cheap, but you are still eating with everyone. I feel that people should share a meal, so no-one is eating alone. For example, I rarely eat desert, but if anyone orders desert, I'll always have  a coffee to keep them company.

[Brentwood]

I think it's perfectly OK to do what you are suggesting. I like to socialize but it costs a lot of money. I am paying back a huge student loan and trying to get my business going, and I think even my friends who know I'm broke don't really understand just how broke. I pick and choose which social events I really want to attend, and if it's in a restaurant in a casual setting I sometimes eat ahead of time and then just order a small appetizer and a drink.

Incidentally, I started writing down every single personal expenditure and was amazed how much goes to a cup of coffee here, a chocolate bar or muffin there, SMALL things. So now I don't buy ANY of that stuff....I'd rather spend that money on an enjoyable dinner with friends. Now that I'm out of the habit of buying snack food when I'm out and about or at work, and other items I don't need, I'll betcha when money starts coming in I'll still live that way.

But, how do you get around that?  On any typical day, I'll find myself in dire need of a healthy snack or a caffeine fix to get me through my next rehearsal or whatever. 

I pack a lunch for myself and my son when I go to work, and at all times I have a South Beach Bar or other quick source of protein/carbs in my purse in case I found myself out for a prolonged period of time. Like Chonsil said, it's much less expensive to buy a package of snack bars at the grocery store than to buy them individually.

[Sterling]

Very often my BF and I will order just a cup of soup and an appitizer and have them delivered as our meal.  Its cheaper this way and you don't end up with so much food.  Or if you are not a big portion eater just order a cup of soup or a side salad and 1 entree and share.

What can I say my friends are lawyers and I am in school.

[kingsrings]

I hope it's not rude, because I am starting to do just that all the time! My friends and I like to dine out too, and it was really adding up after awhile. One weekend I spent $40 on just dining out! I'm really broke right now and need to be saving money for other more important expenses. So sometimes I do find myself eating a meal at home, and then just ordering dessert when dining out with friends. I do have a lot of those buy one, get one free coupons, but all of my dining is done in a group environment, so they are obviously impossible to use then. It's the nickel-and-diming stuff that really gets a lot of people in financial trouble. When you add up all the money you spend on dining out and getting coffee drinks and other stuff like that, it really adds up. I'm trying to cut back on all of that and save money.

[NotCinderell]

I think the main issue is that you show up at the right time and celebrate with everyone else.  What you order is immaterial.