More Lack of Food for Your Guests

[ginlyn32]

comment deleted by poster

[freakyfemme]

It's rude if it's intentional, but sometimes the problem is, you just don't know who's coming.  That's why I hate buying food for post-recital receptions, for one thing--they're open events, which means the whole world could show up, or just your profs and your two or three best friends (slight exaggeration there, but still).  I imagine other events are the same.....a "family" barbecue, for example, could translate into Cousin Murgatroid bringing his new girlfriend, or Uncle Mack bringing his whole bowling team, so all of a sudden, if you'd planned on, say, twenty people coming, and you purchased forty hot dogs.......you can see how a larger-than-expected turnout can lead to problems.

[Lunadiana75]

I'm notorious for "cooking for an army", it's a running joke amongst my friends.  I amile and say that I get out of cooking for several days while I live on leftovers.  Heck even when I have evening gathering, I put out a huge spread of snack foods  along with the drinks.  I can'timagaine not serving food and drink to someone I've invited into my home.

[HogwartsAlum]

I always starve to death at my mom's house, except for the actual holiday dinner that I go there for.  Afterwards, my brother's wife and relatives take home a lot of food.  There are usually leftovers, but I don't always want to eat something for lunch that I gorged on the night before!

I just bring snacks with me or we go up to the grocery store not far from her house.  I buy my own milk, because I drink a lot of it, and some fancy crackers and cheese to munch that I don't usually get at home. 

I freeze to death at her house too.  So I bought some grown-up footie pajamas at WalMart.

[Gyro Widget]

Also, I think a lot of people were never taught how to "receive" guests.    It used to be a very formal process, with lots of guidelines and clearly understood expectations (on both the part of the hostess and the part of the guest).  However, because this kind of activity is not so common anymore, people don't think through what is needed for their visitor's comfort.    Common sense should prevail, but many people don't have much of that these days.  The only thing a guest can do is cut short their visit when it becomes clear that the host is less than hospitable.

I had one friend that once invited guests to his home, offered us something to drink, then proceed to eat a snack himself while not offering a thing.  Sooo tacky. 

I've noticed that this is a growing trend as well, people are just not learning the basics of hostessing.... or at the very least, they think that all they should do is provide multiple bottles of beer for their guests without a single morsel of food.  When I was a young girl, I was taught how to quickly make a fancy looking cheese tray for those unexpected guests, or how to judge the amount of finger foods needed for a small planned gathering.  In Newfoundland, everything is centered around eating and welcoming people into your home and you quickly learn the value of having the freezer stocked with a variety of home-made cookies that freeze well and defrost quickly.. it is just so automatic now... thanks mom.   

[Gyro Widget]

Thank God I'm not the only one who thinks she should be fed at a party!  In our small group of friends one male friend's new wife invited everyone for a grill-out and stated on the email invites that we were to bring our own: beverage, meat to grill, dish to pass, and our own cups, plates and silver wear!!!!!!  I stopped at a store on my way there and bought extra disposable dishes, a huge cake, and extra meat to bring along with my side dishes.  Why the heck are you having people over if you can't even allow them to touch your glasses???  Of course she didn't get it when I came in with all of that.  She's the same one who brings canned corn to pot lucks as her main dish, and the woman can cook!  Of COURSE she helps herself to the other great homemade dishes and never touches her corn, that's for the people who come late--right??)  I completely understand having a potluck if everyone agrees, but bring your own plates and silverwear???  Again, why volunteer your house??!!
Wow, venting feels good...

This woman needs to leave the college days behind.  While poor college students can get away with the whole "bring your own meat and side dish to share", it just reflects badly on a homeowner who is settled in life.  Time to grow up, I think.  Someone mentioned on this forum not long ago that the growing trend appears to be that many people do not believe in entertaining for the sake of being generous anymore.  Its as if they feel entitled to some sort of compensation. 

[willow08]

ginlyn32- Not to belabor the point, but I'm having a hard time envisioning grandma yelling at 3yo for asking for watermelon.  What could she possibly say? (Not doubting the story, just your MIL's sanity.)

"How dare you ask for watermelon!? This is for my special grandchildren!"

I'm just... wow.