Garter creepiness (PlainTacky0415-04)

[Luna_Moon]

I can't fathom this "tradition" at all. My father was uncouth and crass and still would *never* have lifted my skirt unless I was in immediate need of medical attention.

As for the display of the bloodied bedsheets... I have a story about that. When I was a small child, I went to a bridal shower hosted by my father's family, who were Polish, Latvian, and Russian. My mother needed to leave urgently, and I was left in the care of my paternal grandmother, playing quietly in a corner while the womenfolk cleaned up after the shower and talked honestly to the bride about married life. They advised her that her mother in law would come to breakfast the morning after the wedding and would probably find an excuse to go snooping around the newly married couple's bedroom looking for that bloodied sheet. My cousin was gently advised how to fake the appearance of blood on a bedsheet if she needed to, where a cut would go undetected by even the groom, and how much blood was considered "enough" as opposed to just plain "fake". And that could not have been earlier than 1980.

[Twik]

My cousin was gently advised how to fake the appearance of blood on a bedsheet if she needed to, where a cut would go undetected by even the groom, and how much blood was considered "enough" as opposed to just plain "fake".

I know this is not funny, but somehow I could see a new bride determined to hold her head up presenting her MIL with what looks like a CSI crime scene.

[kingsrings]

I pray that I never end up attending a reception where they do any variation of taking the garter off the bride's leg. I don't care how popular it is, I still find the whole thing to be crude, disgusting, and indecent.

[Luna_Moon]

I had a BWW for my first marriage, and I did NOT do the garter tradition. My family was angry and horrified but I held firm.

The marriage was dissolved years ago but some of those relatives STILL point to the "garter issue" as the reason we broke up... as if my ex's infidelity and theft from my accounts had nothing to do with it.

[kingsrings]

I had a BWW for my first marriage, and I did NOT do the garter tradition. My family was angry and horrified but I held firm.

The marriage was dissolved years ago but some of those relatives STILL point to the "garter issue" as the reason we broke up... as if my ex's infidelity and theft from my accounts had nothing to do with it.

What exactly do they say to you about this? "We do wanted to see your husband put his arm up your dress"?? Sheesh.

[kajunchick]

Someone mentioned putting the garter on the girl who catches the bouquet. I've never heard of that tradition. Here (in south Louisiana), the bride sits on the best man's knee and the groom takes the garter off. The groom throws the garter, much like the bouquet toss. The guy who catches it puts it on his arm, around his bicep, and takes a picture with the groom.

[tiny clanger]

In ancient Greece (in Athens, at least) the bride and groom would retire and musicians would hang around outside the door playing rhythmical music to, ahem, help them on their way. I think it was called a hymn to Hymeneas. Yup. Singing a cheery song about your intimate body bits!

See Aristophanes' comedy Peace, which ends with a wedding (staged 421BC). It's not his best play (Frogs is, in my opinion), but I still feel faint thinking about the wedding song at the end! 

[Luna_Moon]

I had a BWW for my first marriage, and I did NOT do the garter tradition. My family was angry and horrified but I held firm.

The marriage was dissolved years ago but some of those relatives STILL point to the "garter issue" as the reason we broke up... as if my ex's infidelity and theft from my accounts had nothing to do with it.

What exactly do they say to you about this? "We do wanted to see your husband put his arm up your dress"?? Sheesh.

It generally went, "Well, when you break with tradition, nothing good is ever the result." Every time I heard that, my eyes rolled so hard I could see my own hairstyle.

[Venus193]

It generally went, "Well, when you break with tradition, nothing good is ever the result." Every time I heard that, my eyes rolled so hard I could see my own hairstyle.

If every child of every parent from the beginning of the species only ever did what his parent said was "tradition," we'd have never gotten out of the cave.

[Cz. Burrito]

I pray that I never end up attending a reception where they do any variation of taking the garter off the bride's leg. I don't care how popular it is, I still find the whole thing to be crude, disgusting, and indecent.

At two of my cousin's weddings (they're siblings), the groom removed the bride's garter with his teeth.  At the second one, it was even the bride's brother (one of said cousins) who was encouraging it the most.  *shiver* 

[Ant V]

I have never heard of a tradition where the father of the bride puts the garter on the bride  for the husband to remove later.  Some creepy freak must have dreamed that one up.  Around here,the bride puts on her own garter.  Ick!  It makes me shudder. 

[Winterlight]

My cousin was gently advised how to fake the appearance of blood on a bedsheet if she needed to, where a cut would go undetected by even the groom, and how much blood was considered "enough" as opposed to just plain "fake".

I know this is not funny, but somehow I could see a new bride determined to hold her head up presenting her MIL with what looks like a CSI crime scene.

That was my thought too. "You want blood, lady? Here it is!"

[Saro]

In ancient Greece (in Athens, at least) the bride and groom would retire and musicians would hang around outside the door playing rhythmical music to, ahem, help them on their way. I think it was called a hymn to Hymeneas. Yup. Singing a cheery song about your intimate body bits!

See Aristophanes' comedy Peace, which ends with a wedding (staged 421BC). It's not his best play (Frogs is, in my opinion), but I still feel faint thinking about the wedding song at the end! 

You almost caused me to snort Diet Dr. Pepper up my newly pierced nose (only mentioning that because it would have hurt). That was hilarious.

ETA: The garter thing is creepy and I feel bad for the poor bride. I personally don't want to do the toss either. Seems kind of wrong in a way. I don't know.

[Alida]

My MOH was my 17 year old cousin, who was like a sister to me.  The Best Man caught the garter.  I pulled him aside and told him if he went any higher than just above her knee, he'd find out what a Sicilian woman could do when she was unhappy.

Smart man, he stopped just above the knee.  And the DJ didn't encourage him to go any higher (also a smart man!).

IMO, no one belongs under a woman's dress other than her SO and not so high in public!

[dixieangel]

I know this thread is from years ago but it appeared when I searched for "father placing garter on bride". After reading all the comments on it, I just had to tell about another inappropriate event I have observed. After a recent wedding I attended, the mother of the bride posted a picture on Facebook of the STEP-Father placing the garters under the bride's gown. WHAT?!?!?! That is PERVERTED!!! At the reception, the father of the bride didn't want to see the groom was removing the garter. When a mutual friend of ours asked him about the picture, he said he would never think that was a father's responsibility, much less a step-father's. That either the bride herself, her attendants or her mother should help her with that. And to top it off, people have "liked" it on Facebook. The whole thing is just disgusting.