Author Topic: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"  (Read 15431 times)

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Ceallach

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #45 on: May 15, 2008, 06:23:22 PM »

What exactly does a smoker look like?

 ???



Yellow, wrinkly, not unlike an egyptian mummy.  Oh wait, maybe that's just my mother.

Seriously though, I'd take it as a compliment.  They're saying you don't stink and you're not prematurely aged plus there's an implication that you're too smart to do a stupid thing like smoke.

Which, when they say that, implies that all smokers do stink, age prematurely, and are dumb. That's why I have a problem with it.


I actually agree with where you're coming from, which is why although I don't think it is something anybody should actually say.  I still think, as per my previous post, that it is in a way complimentary (because unfortunately the smokers we notice most are the inconsiderate ones, it is nice to meet the ones who aren't!)  but it's the kind of comment that does reveal an underlying assumption so is rude.  But I did want to point out that when somebody says it, often it is blurted out from a good place. They are thinking "This person does not demonstrate any of the negative traits I associate with that group" not pointedly saying "Ew, you're part of that group? I now think worse of you".   But of course, making the implication that the group (smokers) that you are part of is bad, is of course rude.  (Even if aspects of it are accurate).
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extranormal

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #46 on: May 17, 2008, 03:49:56 PM »
I don't find that especially complimentary, either. It reminds me of when somebody said to me, "I'd never have guessed you're homeschoolers. Your son is so well adjusted!" And the time somebody was shocked that my husband was a supporter of a certain political party, because "he's so nice!"

Or the classic, which I read in an Erma Bombeck essay, though I don't think it is original to her, "You sure don't sweat much for a fat girl."

When I pay a compliment, I try not to imply that the person has narrowly escaped being a member of a group I find odious.

PeasNCues

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #47 on: May 19, 2008, 02:31:24 PM »
Just a thought... maybe the banning of smoking in cars isn't only to prevent accidents, etc. Perhaps it is to reduce the amount of toxic litter from people throwing butts out the window? It's probably easier to regulate people smoking in the car rather than the split second when someone tosses the cigarette out.
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penguinpants

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #48 on: May 19, 2008, 06:21:34 PM »
Possible response for the OP:

(while smiling, and leaning in, conspiratorially) ... "Well, I did have cosmetic surgery to remove my horns ... " (stroll away, cackling evilly)

 ;)
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guihong

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #49 on: May 19, 2008, 10:38:40 PM »
I don't smoke, but I've had the opposite-"you look like a smoker"  ::).  Maybe some of the offense (if any is taken), is that "I can't believe you smoke(d)!" sounds like "You don't LOOK Jewish (or insert religion here)".  What on earth do either category look like?  I get that one quite a bit, to which I answer "You should see half of the congregation". 

I confess I've used "I can't believe you smoked" before, one time to a professor of mine who used to smoke.  I was surprised, because most of his career was lurching up rock cliffs and I couldn't imagine how winded he must have been.  That's what ultimately drove him to quit.

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Twik

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #50 on: May 20, 2008, 03:08:47 PM »
Some states have actually proposed no smoking in personal cars due to dangers while driving. I see more people talking on cell phones while driving than smoking.

I'll be the first to tell you that I would be racking up the tickets on this one. I would tell any cop who says something to me about it oo, I have been smoking and driving since I got my license and have yet to get into an accident. Until the government starts to pay my car note then they have no right to tell me I can't smoke in my car. They can give me the ticket but it will not be a deterrent.

I don't completely agree with that. While yes, I do believe that you should be able to smoke in your car, I would never get in a car again if the government backed off completely about what one can do while driving. I do believe someone posted once about a woman driving erratically behind her and pulled over to let her pass. The woman was knitting while driving!

While I agree they shouldn't back off entirely, it's different when they try to ban smoking. I think that is more because smokers feel like we have so few places where we can smoke. I'll be the first to admit while I try to be a considerate smoker, I don't always succeed. I will always ask if anyone minds if I smoke, while outdoors and no one else is smoking, but until I joined this forum I thought of the ground as my own personal ashtray. I'll admit that even as late as this morning, while driving to work I flicked my completed cigarette out the window and only after it left my hand did I think oh Crud I shouldn't have done that. I'm trying to get better but I think when it comes to that the gov. should just leave us be in our own cars.

Banning smoking by drivers sounds MUCH more appealing if you have ever had the misfortune to be a passenger of a driver who has just dropped a lit cigarette in his lap. It's a rare driver can who can calmly say, "Now, as my clothes are scorching (and everything underneath), I will carefully pull over to the side, after checking my mirrors, and remove the hot ember...."
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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #51 on: May 20, 2008, 03:13:34 PM »
Some states have actually proposed no smoking in personal cars due to dangers while driving. I see more people talking on cell phones while driving than smoking.

I'll be the first to tell you that I would be racking up the tickets on this one. I would tell any cop who says something to me about it oo, I have been smoking and driving since I got my license and have yet to get into an accident. Until the government starts to pay my car note then they have no right to tell me I can't smoke in my car. They can give me the ticket but it will not be a deterrent.

I don't completely agree with that. While yes, I do believe that you should be able to smoke in your car, I would never get in a car again if the government backed off completely about what one can do while driving. I do believe someone posted once about a woman driving erratically behind her and pulled over to let her pass. The woman was knitting while driving!

While I agree they shouldn't back off entirely, it's different when they try to ban smoking. I think that is more because smokers feel like we have so few places where we can smoke. I'll be the first to admit while I try to be a considerate smoker, I don't always succeed. I will always ask if anyone minds if I smoke, while outdoors and no one else is smoking, but until I joined this forum I thought of the ground as my own personal ashtray. I'll admit that even as late as this morning, while driving to work I flicked my completed cigarette out the window and only after it left my hand did I think oh Crud I shouldn't have done that. I'm trying to get better but I think when it comes to that the gov. should just leave us be in our own cars.

Banning smoking by drivers sounds MUCH more appealing if you have ever had the misfortune to be a passenger of a driver who has just dropped a lit cigarette in his lap. It's a rare driver can who can calmly say, "Now, as my clothes are scorching (and everything underneath), I will carefully pull over to the side, after checking my mirrors, and remove the hot ember...."

I was just talking about this thread to a friend of mine and we agree. It takes a "special" kind of person to drop a lit cigarette into their own lap. Now I have had an ember burn my finger while driving, it is not enough to lose control of the car, you maybe just flinch a bit. I have also had the misfortune of having a cigarette fly back into my open back window, again that sucks but I did not lose control of my car. I can only imagine that if I were ever "special" enough to drop a lit cigarette in my lap while driving I would lift my bottom up off the seat and find a place to pull over. It sucks to have your seat ruined but a ruined seat is a risk you take when smoking in the car. Oh and before any one says that I would not have the presence of mind to lift my bottom, I will say that I once missed the crack of the window completely and actually hit the window causing the "cherry" of my cigarette to fall into my door handle, and again I didn't freak out.

hobish

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #52 on: May 20, 2008, 03:43:24 PM »

What exactly does a smoker look like?

 ???



Yellow, wrinkly, not unlike an egyptian mummy.  Oh wait, maybe that's just my mother.

Seriously though, I'd take it as a compliment.  They're saying you don't stink and you're not prematurely aged plus there's an implication that you're too smart to do a stupid thing like smoke.

No, i still have to disagree, especially if one is a smoker. An implication that one is too smart to engage in whatever activity it is that one is engaging in is not complimentary, except perhaps underhandedly.
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Alida

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #53 on: May 20, 2008, 03:59:04 PM »
It's more than supposedly. I smoked for the better part of 15 years and have been a non-smoker for just about 10 years. I can smell smokers - they don't need to be actively smoking for me to notice.

POD.  I've never smoked, but I am highly sensitive to it.  When I was pregnant, the slightest whiff of smoke would send tears streaking down my cheeks from the irritation in my eyes.  Now, my eyes water and my nose itches like crazy when I'm around someone who has smoked.

My brother and his wife went with DD and I to the Faire before they were married.  They sneaked off for a bit and were highly embarrassed when we came across them smoking.  I had to laugh and tell them that was something really hard to hide, that we'd already known they smoked.

TaylorMade

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #54 on: May 21, 2008, 01:01:10 PM »
Some states have actually proposed no smoking in personal cars due to dangers while driving. I see more people talking on cell phones while driving than smoking.

I'll be the first to tell you that I would be racking up the tickets on this one. I would tell any cop who says something to me about it oo, I have been smoking and driving since I got my license and have yet to get into an accident. Until the government starts to pay my car note then they have no right to tell me I can't smoke in my car. They can give me the ticket but it will not be a deterrent.

I don't completely agree with that. While yes, I do believe that you should be able to smoke in your car, I would never get in a car again if the government backed off completely about what one can do while driving. I do believe someone posted once about a woman driving erratically behind her and pulled over to let her pass. The woman was knitting while driving!

While I agree they shouldn't back off entirely, it's different when they try to ban smoking. I think that is more because smokers feel like we have so few places where we can smoke. I'll be the first to admit while I try to be a considerate smoker, I don't always succeed. I will always ask if anyone minds if I smoke, while outdoors and no one else is smoking, but until I joined this forum I thought of the ground as my own personal ashtray. I'll admit that even as late as this morning, while driving to work I flicked my completed cigarette out the window and only after it left my hand did I think oh Crud I shouldn't have done that. I'm trying to get better but I think when it comes to that the gov. should just leave us be in our own cars.

Banning smoking by drivers sounds MUCH more appealing if you have ever had the misfortune to be a passenger of a driver who has just dropped a lit cigarette in his lap. It's a rare driver can who can calmly say, "Now, as my clothes are scorching (and everything underneath), I will carefully pull over to the side, after checking my mirrors, and remove the hot ember...."

I was just talking about this thread to a friend of mine and we agree. It takes a "special" kind of person to drop a lit cigarette into their own lap. Now I have had an ember burn my finger while driving, it is not enough to lose control of the car, you maybe just flinch a bit. I have also had the misfortune of having a cigarette fly back into my open back window, again that sucks but I did not lose control of my car. I can only imagine that if I were ever "special" enough to drop a lit cigarette in my lap while driving I would lift my bottom up off the seat and find a place to pull over. It sucks to have your seat ruined but a ruined seat is a risk you take when smoking in the car. Oh and before any one says that I would not have the presence of mind to lift my bottom, I will say that I once missed the crack of the window completely and actually hit the window causing the "cherry" of my cigarette to fall into my door handle, and again I didn't freak out.

Oh... I am special enough :)

It was about 20 years ago and I was wearing a mini-skirt.  My underwear were orange and silky.  Why do I remember what underwear I had on?  The cigarette somehow ended UP my mini-skirt and burned a hole in my underwear.  Gosh, I can't stop laughing when I think about that!

I did not freak out.  I calmly pulled the cigarette from my crotch, put it out, and went on with my day, with a hole in my underwear.

I completely disagree with banning smoking while driving only because I do not believe the world is better with MORE laws.

California (where I live) instituted a new law in 2008:

http://www.dmv.ca.gov/about/leg/leginfo_dl.htm

Add: Health and Safety Code Article 2.5 to chapter 4 of Part 15 of Division 104. Amend: Vehicle Code 12814.6 (SB 7 Chapter 425)

    * Makes it an infraction punishable by a fine not exceeding one hundred dollars ($100) for a person to smoke a pipe, cigar, or cigarette in a motor vehicle any time a minor is present in the vehicle.

DiamondGirl

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #55 on: May 21, 2008, 02:14:41 PM »
Some states have actually proposed no smoking in personal cars due to dangers while driving. I see more people talking on cell phones while driving than smoking.

I'll be the first to tell you that I would be racking up the tickets on this one. I would tell any cop who says something to me about it oo, I have been smoking and driving since I got my license and have yet to get into an accident. Until the government starts to pay my car note then they have no right to tell me I can't smoke in my car. They can give me the ticket but it will not be a deterrent.

I don't completely agree with that. While yes, I do believe that you should be able to smoke in your car, I would never get in a car again if the government backed off completely about what one can do while driving. I do believe someone posted once about a woman driving erratically behind her and pulled over to let her pass. The woman was knitting while driving!

While I agree they shouldn't back off entirely, it's different when they try to ban smoking. I think that is more because smokers feel like we have so few places where we can smoke. I'll be the first to admit while I try to be a considerate smoker, I don't always succeed. I will always ask if anyone minds if I smoke, while outdoors and no one else is smoking, but until I joined this forum I thought of the ground as my own personal ashtray. I'll admit that even as late as this morning, while driving to work I flicked my completed cigarette out the window and only after it left my hand did I think oh Crud I shouldn't have done that. I'm trying to get better but I think when it comes to that the gov. should just leave us be in our own cars.

Banning smoking by drivers sounds MUCH more appealing if you have ever had the misfortune to be a passenger of a driver who has just dropped a lit cigarette in his lap. It's a rare driver can who can calmly say, "Now, as my clothes are scorching (and everything underneath), I will carefully pull over to the side, after checking my mirrors, and remove the hot ember...."

I was just talking about this thread to a friend of mine and we agree. It takes a "special" kind of person to drop a lit cigarette into their own lap. Now I have had an ember burn my finger while driving, it is not enough to lose control of the car, you maybe just flinch a bit. I have also had the misfortune of having a cigarette fly back into my open back window, again that sucks but I did not lose control of my car. I can only imagine that if I were ever "special" enough to drop a lit cigarette in my lap while driving I would lift my bottom up off the seat and find a place to pull over. It sucks to have your seat ruined but a ruined seat is a risk you take when smoking in the car. Oh and before any one says that I would not have the presence of mind to lift my bottom, I will say that I once missed the crack of the window completely and actually hit the window causing the "cherry" of my cigarette to fall into my door handle, and again I didn't freak out.

Oh... I am special enough :)

It was about 20 years ago and I was wearing a mini-skirt.  My underwear were orange and silky.  Why do I remember what underwear I had on?  The cigarette somehow ended UP my mini-skirt and burned a hole in my underwear.  Gosh, I can't stop laughing when I think about that!

I did not freak out.  I calmly pulled the cigarette from my crotch, put it out, and went on with my day, with a hole in my underwear.

I completely disagree with banning smoking while driving only because I do not believe the world is better with MORE laws.

California (where I live) instituted a new law in 2008:

http://www.dmv.ca.gov/about/leg/leginfo_dl.htm

Add: Health and Safety Code Article 2.5 to chapter 4 of Part 15 of Division 104. Amend: Vehicle Code 12814.6 (SB 7 Chapter 425)

    * Makes it an infraction punishable by a fine not exceeding one hundred dollars ($100) for a person to smoke a pipe, cigar, or cigarette in a motor vehicle any time a minor is present in the vehicle.


I sincerely hope I didn't offend you.

I'm glad to hear that you didn't freak out though.

GertrudeMcFuzz

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #56 on: May 21, 2008, 03:45:26 PM »
I'll never forget my neighbor pulling up to his house, smoke billowing from his back seat....

I was in 7th or 8th grade, and my closest friend lived across the street. I was sitting on my front steps around dinner time when her dad came screeching up to the curb, the aforementioned smoke pouring out the windows. Mr. J. jumped from the car, yanked open the back door, and pulled out the entire bench seat (it was an old beater car). He threw it on the ground, ran to the house and turned the garden hose on the seat. After the smoke cleared we all rushed over to see a giant hole in the upholstery, springs exposed. By giant hole I mean half the seat was gone. Mr. J. sheepishly explained that he threw his cigarette butt out the window while driving and it must have come back in the rear window. The lit cigarette smoldered for a long time (like it would on an old couch) and finally burst into flame as he turned onto our block.

He was a bit shaken after that. ;)

TaylorMade

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #57 on: May 22, 2008, 01:43:56 AM »
I was just talking about this thread to a friend of mine and we agree. It takes a "special" kind of person to drop a lit cigarette into their own lap. Now I have had an ember burn my finger while driving, it is not enough to lose control of the car, you maybe just flinch a bit. I have also had the misfortune of having a cigarette fly back into my open back window, again that sucks but I did not lose control of my car. I can only imagine that if I were ever "special" enough to drop a lit cigarette in my lap while driving I would lift my bottom up off the seat and find a place to pull over. It sucks to have your seat ruined but a ruined seat is a risk you take when smoking in the car. Oh and before any one says that I would not have the presence of mind to lift my bottom, I will say that I once missed the crack of the window completely and actually hit the window causing the "cherry" of my cigarette to fall into my door handle, and again I didn't freak out.

Oh... I am special enough :)

It was about 20 years ago and I was wearing a mini-skirt.  My underwear were orange and silky.  Why do I remember what underwear I had on?  The cigarette somehow ended UP my mini-skirt and burned a hole in my underwear.  Gosh, I can't stop laughing when I think about that!

I did not freak out.  I calmly pulled the cigarette from my crotch, put it out, and went on with my day, with a hole in my underwear.

I completely disagree with banning smoking while driving only because I do not believe the world is better with MORE laws.

California (where I live) instituted a new law in 2008:

http://www.dmv.ca.gov/about/leg/leginfo_dl.htm

Add: Health and Safety Code Article 2.5 to chapter 4 of Part 15 of Division 104. Amend: Vehicle Code 12814.6 (SB 7 Chapter 425)

    * Makes it an infraction punishable by a fine not exceeding one hundred dollars ($100) for a person to smoke a pipe, cigar, or cigarette in a motor vehicle any time a minor is present in the vehicle.


I sincerely hope I didn't offend you.

I'm glad to hear that you didn't freak out though.

You didn't :)  I walk into enough walls and trip UP enough stairs to already know I was *special*

note* - recent name change - I am the correct person responding :)

goblue2539

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #58 on: May 28, 2008, 09:49:46 PM »
You didn't :)  I walk into enough walls and trip UP enough stairs to already know I was *special*

I thought I was the only one special enough to fall up stairs.  Ever broken a bone doing it? :P

TaylorMade

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Re: " I wouldn't have guessed you are a smoker!"
« Reply #59 on: May 28, 2008, 09:54:09 PM »
You didn't :)  I walk into enough walls and trip UP enough stairs to already know I was *special*

I thought I was the only one special enough to fall up stairs.  Ever broken a bone doing it? :P


Nope, apparently I'm not that special  >:D Maybe it's the Michigander in us :)  (I'm assuming your from Michigan based on your ID)