Author Topic: Late Guests  (Read 9004 times)

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crazyone

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #15 on: January 10, 2007, 11:21:04 AM »
My DH aunt is like this.  Single, no kids, in her fifties, should know better, always late.  One time she was over 3 hours late for my Dh b-day party saying she was hungry, she was pointed toward the fridge and told to help herself, "just use the microwave and put back what you don't need." Bad manners on our part? Well, she is ALWAYS like that. The ONLY time she has been on time is when something is held at a resturant with a reservation as she knows the resturant will not accomodate her and everyone else will sit down with or without her.  She was 40 minutes late to a baby shower and a little upset that the hall started serving already. 

Evil Duckie

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #16 on: January 10, 2007, 12:36:35 PM »
You end at the planned time. You are not required to make adjustments for those who are late. Once in a while everyone will be unavoidably late. This is forgivable especially if they let you know that they are going to be late.

Being late is a pet peeve of mine. I am even tougher on myself on being on time that others. I would rather be 30 minutes early than 5 minutes late. I will make no concessions to those who are chronically late.

People who are late like the fact that they are now in control. They will deny it but it is true or they would change.

I have several relatives that are famous for being late. They know that I will go on without them so they are on time with me.

Sophia

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #17 on: January 18, 2007, 11:42:44 AM »
I have several relatives that are famous for being late. They know that I will go on without them so they are on time with me.

I find this extremely interesting. 

I was watching Dr. Phil yesterday.  He had a woman on who was always late, and she was making her sorority sisters late because they carpooled.  He said that studies of chronically late people show that they are extremely arrogant.  They really do think that the world revolves around them.  The thing they are doing when they should be leaving to be on time is more important than what they will be doing with other people later.  I thought it was interesting that the late guest was late for her flight to LA for the show, then was aghast that they wouldn't let her on the plane when she got there right before takeoff. 

Tabris

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #18 on: January 18, 2007, 07:50:53 PM »
My MIL is chronically late, and in her case, it's not that "whatever she's doing" is more important than you. It's that she is completely and utterly unable to prioritize ANYTHING.

She is unable to figure out which steps have to be done before other steps and which details are okay to omit if you are in a hurry.

She also has no idea how long things take because she never performs any one action without getting interrupted by another action because she cannot decide which is the more important one.

When she is here, we can ride herd on her pretty well. At her own place, it's a nightmare. Fortunately, when we're there, the only schedule we need to accommodate is our own and therefore it doesn't matter if we're half an hour late to IHOP.  ;D

"The hunger for love is much more difficult to ease than the hunger for bread." ~Mother Teresa

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Peaches737

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #19 on: January 18, 2007, 11:27:58 PM »
I'm getting more empowered with the chronically late.

One of my co-workers is famous.

I left.  Her feelings were hurt.

I apologized for hurting her feelings, but not for leaving.

I do that with my mother as well.

BabyJane

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #20 on: January 20, 2007, 01:08:58 PM »
The only time you can be taken advantage of is when you allow it to happen...

Tabris

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #21 on: January 20, 2007, 02:05:21 PM »
I left.  Her feelings were hurt.

Coworker: I'm hurt that you left without MEEE!

You: I felt hurt that you stood me up. What can we do to prevent our mutual hurt feelings from happening again?

"The hunger for love is much more difficult to ease than the hunger for bread." ~Mother Teresa

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nutraxfornerves

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #22 on: January 22, 2007, 01:33:14 PM »
I saw a cartoon recently. Two couples are sitting in a living room facing each other. One man says to his wife "Honey, let's go to bed so these nice people can go home."

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Gwywnnydd

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #23 on: January 24, 2007, 08:27:38 PM »
My MIL is chronically late, and in her case, it's not that "whatever she's doing" is more important than you. It's that she is completely and utterly unable to prioritize ANYTHING.

CRUD MONKEYS!! You're married to my brother! You just described my mother!
Actually, while my mother is chronically late, it's not that she can't prioritize (she can), but she has *no* internal clock (she just doesn't sense time passing. I have the same issue, but I am paranoid about clock-watching), and is easily distracted. We no longer expect her on time. Ever. If we need her there on time, we tell her 45 minutes earlier. It's usually enough.

orsuela

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #24 on: January 25, 2007, 06:52:20 PM »
This reminds me of my little sister's high school grad. party.  The invitations said that it ended at 8.  One family showed up right at 8, and made themselves very comfortable.  They had just converted to a certain religion that is scarily close to a sect*, and proceeded to bombard the other guests (my close family and friends of our family) about their recent conversion and all the strict rules that it entailed.  Their 14 year old son had just attended a seminar on their new religion and he was telling a 40 year-old man how he (the teenager) knew God so much better than this wonderful man who used to be his sunday school teacher.  His parents were listening to him like he was the Messiah, and let him go on and on.  Everyone there was uncomfortable, and most guests had left.  My father and mother had finished cleaning up after a very long day, and my dad (who needed to go to bed--he works 80 hour weeks) was just sick of hearing this kid go on about how he knew best, started turning off all the lights and saying good night.  They finally got the hint when he just climbed the stairs and went to bed.  Thank God!  How can people be so clueless??  I think my father did just the right thing!!

*If they want to believe this, fine, but to come late to someone else's house during a party to try and win converts is just ridiculous. 

Sophia

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #25 on: February 06, 2007, 03:01:51 PM »
It could be worse, they could have come on time and ruined your party. 

Veronica

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Re: Late Guests
« Reply #26 on: February 18, 2007, 06:05:54 PM »
They might have been unclear on the type of party it was.  I hosted a Christmas dinner party this year and the party began at 6:00 and we had planned to eat at 6:30.  First thing that happened was that at 5:30 DF mentions that a co-worker and his girlfriend were coming to the party.  I had told him a month before that he could invite them but he hadn't mentioned it again and I had forgotten.  We had to quickly put the middle eave in the dining room table and rustle up two extra place settings.  No problem. 

Everyone arrives promptly but the other couple doesn't show up.  DF calls at 6:30 and they say they are on their way.  They get to my house at 7:15.  I am pretty annoyed by this time because I'm afraid that the food is going to get cold but since I knew they are coming I didn't want to start without them.  The girlfriend takes one look at the fully set table (with people seated) and looks horrified.  She turns to her boyfriend and says "you said it wasn't a dinner party!" He had thought it was just a cocktail party, DF is not always the best communicator.  She was mortified and kept apologizing.  I, of course, was fine once I realized it was just a misunderstanding and everyone else thought it was pretty funny.  We decided that from that point on she and I would talk directly instead of going through the men.   

At my most recent party they showed up half an hour early  :D

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