For Our Newbies - HOT TOPICS that you need to be aware of

[DottyG]

I thought it might help to have a list of topics that are either 1) possibly contentious or 2) done to death by now.  These are ones that you might want to do a quick search of the site on before you start a new thread on them.  It'll save you a lot of grief, I promise!

Ok, first and foremost, EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE READ THE FORUM RULES!!!  They're very easy to find - they're permanently "clipped" to the top of the forum.  There's no excuse for not knowing the rules here!

And, read the Abbreviations/Definitions thread.  You shouldn't ever have to ask what "POD" means when you see it in a thread - it's very well explained for you.

Old-timers, feel free to add to the list.

Everyday Kinda Stuff
 

• Removing shoes in the house - yes or no?
• Knitting (just do a search - it's too bizarre to try to explain!)
• Shopping carts - take them back or leave them in the parking lot?
• Any kind of retaliatory actions against people who steal from you (ie, putting Ex-Lax in food so that a thief in your office "learns" not to steal food from you is ILLEGAL.  Please don't post that it's a good idea to do something like this.  It's not looked upon well here at EHell.)
• Cellphone behavior (not, necessarily, contentious, but there may be a fairly recent thread on it, since it gets discussed so often; you might want to just see if there's already one going
• Reclining seats on planes and trains
• Letting your pet cat roam outside (some cultures feel this should not happen while others can't imagine not doing so)

Children Issues
 

• Breastfeeding - ok in public or not?
• Is it "Childfree" or "Childless"
• Is it ok for kids to play in the middle of the street?
• Changing a baby in public
• Alcohol/smoking for pregnant women
• Stork spots at stores
• Children on planes. Children on trains. Children at weddings. Should children stand so an adult can sit? These make one of our mods want to weep in her coffee!
• Disciplining children (spanking, disciplining others' kids, etc)
• SUV strollers

Food/Restaurant Issues
 

• Tipping - necessary or not?
• Sharing your recipes - do you have to do it?
• Bringing outside food/drink into movie theaters
• Peanut allergies
• Vegetarianism (this isn't a topic that can't be discussed, but do know that it has potential for problems - you might want to do a search and make sure you know what's been discussed before prior to starting another thread)

Celebrations/Weddings
 

• Birthday parties for yourself (in some circles, this is approved)
• Dollar Dances
• Cash bars
• Halloween (some are very much against it for religious reasons; others are not - tread lightly here)

Entertainment
 

• Best/Worst/Favorite Song/TVShow/Movie/Book and/or any variation or combination thereof (Always fun threads, but check first as most have been started already.)
• Topics on the tv show "The View" - these seem to get quite heated very quickly, mainly because they evolve into discussions about politics (which is verboten at EHell).  Straight etiquette discussions are fine as long as they stay just that.

Lest you think you can't discuss anything here, know that we do have a topic that everyone agrees on! It's best not to bring a snake into a restaurant!

Note:

The purpose of the list, though, isn't a definitive "DO NOT EVER SPEAK OF THIS ISSUE EVER AGAIN!"  It's merely a "heads up" that the issue DID get contentious before.  For whatever reason (even if that was that people didn't mind their manners), it got heated.  So, a glance at the past thread(s) related to that issue may provide some guidelines to (the generic) you if you do wish to bring up the subject again.  It's a way of knowing that, for whatever reason, you could be stepping into the quicksand and not realize it.  So, just tread a little lightly and carefully.

That said, there really are some topics that, while not verboten here, really are ones that are SO likely to become heated that it might be best to really, really think hard about starting another thread on them.  Not to say that you can't do so.  But, if a newbie comes in and posts a "Hey everyone!  What do you think about telling my guests that they must take off their shoes and start breastfeeding before pushing their shopping carts into my home?!", you can probably hear the audible groan across the world!

Also, please see War_Doc's post in Reply #235.  It really is a good post.

[WestAussieGirl]

8.  Changing a baby in public

[DottyG]

HOW COULD I FORGET THAT ONE, WAG?!    You're right Changing a Baby on an Airplane.  (I seem to have blocked it out of my memory - too painful! )

[MaggieB]

9.  Grammar mistakes that drive you crazy.

I know it isn't necessarily etiquette related, but I've seen some threads get pretty heated.   

[Shores]

Birthday parties for yourself

Dollar Dances

[FoxPaws]

Best/Worst/Favorite Song/TVShow/Movie/Book and/or any variation or combination thereof.
Always fun threads, but check first as most have been started already.  

The Search feature searches the category that you are in. If you want to search the entire forum, you need to be on the main page.

Also, any thread you reply to is going to pop up in your Show New Replies queue into infinity and beyond. There is - so far - no known way to stop this. (Something to think about before replying to a years old ongoing debate or a hot topic.)

[MrsO]

Not sure if I qualify as an 'old timer' yet  but threads about smoking always get quite heated and end up going round in circles.

Also- knitting? Seriously?

[cass2591]

Don't forget serving an alcoholic beverage to a pregnant woman.

Smoking while pregnant.

Seat belts, although this doesn't relate to pregnancy, necessarily, though I'm sure someone could object because, after all, some doctor somewhere probably said a seat belt could hurt the fetus. How I don't know, but that doesn't matter.

Children on planes. Children on trains. Children at weddings. Should children stand so an adult can sit?

These are but a few of the topics that make me want to weep into my coffee cup because I know trouble lies ahead.

[jimithing]

Cash bars.

[Brentwood]

Courtesy "stork spots" in parking lots for pregnant women.

[wheeitsme]

You can also use the "advanced search feature" to search posts by "Ehelldame" with the word "locked"

 

[Lisbeth]

Disciplining others' children
Public disciplining of one's own children
Corporal punishment of children, especially in public
Registry information in shower invitations
Reclining one's airplane seat

[MrsO]

Oops, forgot: Large strollers/pushchairs  (sometimes referred to here as "SUV strollers").

[Miss Vertigo]

Oops, forgot: Large strollers/pushchairs  (sometimes referred to here as "SUV strollers").

I saw them referred to as 'Baby's First Hummer' in a post this morning and my laptop nearly ended up wearing my cup of tea 

Showers for second babies.

[L.A. Lady]

Any thread that has to do with smoking.

I'm not sure if this has been covered here, but a lot have heated conversations seem to start if you say anything negative to say about certain dog breeds.