Can this really be used politely here?

[Ziggy Stardust]

From a bit of lurking and reading this particular part of the forum, it seems like these "lines" are designed to be used on dense, etiquette-challenged people in dire need of, well, Etiquette School. I can totally see how they could be very effective on rude strangers/acquaintances who may stop, think, and realize they were rude.

But I've seen it used a LOT on this forum, sometimes as what looks like code for "you're wrong", often for things that aren't assumptions at all, and rarely in a manner that could be called polite.

It seems to me that no matter how polite a line is in isolation, if the implication is that the person you're using it on is rude and too dense to know they're being rude, and they're aware of that implication, it seems inherently passive-aggressive and rude.

Thoughts?

[hobish]

I'm afraid i agree that i have seen it used in a PA/snarky way here in just the way you described. 

I still think it is a good line when used properly. It was the best thing i could come up with when, after my grandfather's funeral, my grandmother's home health aide told me i was living in sin. 
So ... there are situations where i think it is neither rude nor innapropriate.

[Ziggy Stardust]

Oh, I totally agree. I'm just not sure if any of those situations are on this board.

[Hanna]

I agree thoroughly.  I have to tell you, the interesting assumption line has become my biggest pet peeve.  It has become cliche.
It is over-used to the point of becoming ineffective, and almost never used even remotely as well as in the story where we first heard it.
(In my recollection: Woman in park with two babies, stranger asks if they have the same father and she smiled and slowly said "what an interesting assumption".  It was brilliant.  She was overheard by an eHellion.)