There are some great suggestions on this thread. And, Felicia, add my voice to those who are saying you're handling this wonderfully and I can't believe how patient you were.
Now, how can we add something that will keep you from having to stew about it afterward...
I LOVE the keeping score idea (with no explanation, of course) or the having someone else who knows the story burst into laughter with you everytime he does this (to help this along, since he will start to pitch these comments so only you can hear, you may have to get "helper" to sit as close as possible to you, and relay each comment to Helper..."Helper, John says he's not attracted to women who are my size," ...pause, look at each other, simultaneous bursting into laughter.
If the table was small enough, and the group dynamic such that this was possible, I'd love to see EVERYONE in on the gag...each time he pulls one of these, everybody stand up, turn around, sit down....resume as if nothing was going on...
He's already halfway to psychopath...many of these strategies would drive him completely around the bend, I think. And good riddance.
And what's up with Lisa? She's being a total (female dog).
what completely pathetic specimans of humanity.