Didn't mean to do the lighthearted subject header however DH did come up with a serious email to be sent out to all involve, real or not:
To all Whom is concern,
Effective today, we ask that you cease and desist with all forms of communication, including and not limited to ground delivery, phone calls, text messaging, myspace, chat programs and word of mouth.This includes involving third parties, visual contact, and etc.
There will be no party this weekend nor plans for another one. We ask to be left alone, this weekend, so we may have a quiet weekend with our family, and this is not limited to just family, but also our residence. Do not attempt to physically or by any other method interfere.
Any form of communications as defined as "any methods of delivering information to us", will be consider as spam and harassment, a copy will be made for future reference and not limited by time, and given to the proper authorities, not limiting to internet servers or legal methods.
This includes third parties, and method of third party communication as we are not interested who knows you or not and are asking and requesting to be left alone, this weekend and beyond.
This incident has exceeded normal boundries of social and etiquette understanding and will be treated as both harassment and intentional desire to cause harm, be it verbal, emotional or physical.
Failure to follow this request to cease and desist and that includes sending any form of response to this email will be consider a violation. This is your only and final email from us.
The Tendereyes (not our real name).