ROFL...Thank you for giving us something to laugh about...ooo...I could hug and kiss all of your evil twins for those merry ideas!! LOL
My evil twin was thinking since apparently the e-vite plus the fact Sue knew what was going on regarding the party for a month wasn't enough, that maybe next time, to help clarify things for her and all connected to her, I should have taken out a full page ad in the newspaper, buy some radio time AND do a guest spot on Oprah so she can understand that only she, her husband and her children were invited.
I'm going to write something which may appear to be harsh but given the fact that I have done several media interviews this holiday season on this exact same topic, I'll tell you what I just told the Orlando Sentinel reporter two days ago.
1. Politeness and consideration are not euphamisms for "doormat".
2. Regardless of what the other person (guests, in this case) did, almost all such situations could have been completely nipped in the bud if someone (namely the hostess) had a backbone.
3. Having a backbone doesn't make a person rude. Repeat after me, "I'm sorry, I cannot accomodate that request," in a pleasant but firm tone of voice.
4. Screaming, yelling, angry retaliation is rude.
At the very first when Sue proposed the idea of inviting Joan, you should have told Sue, "I'm sorry, I cannot accomodate her. You'll have to contact her and explain it to her yourself." If Sue pitched a fit and threatened to not come, you calmly reply, "I'm very sorry to hear that. You'll be missed."
You are the master of your domain, your home, your party. Your rules rule and uninvited/obnoxious guests can drool.
Not the least bit harsh at all; Lol..don't worry..no screaming or yelling done on this part from us.
DH received this and we're hoping this means someone is realizing Sue has gone to far and this is something that is to be dropped for good:You're totally off, Tendereyes. You're making some really broad assumptions based on some statements that were made to try to help you see things from another point of view. You are choosing to stay p--- off.
As with so many other situations, I am now walking away from the drama. I see your point of view, but I also see the other side and I'm not going to feed into your anger.
Hope you have a happy holiday.
Name withheld of individual that Sue decided could email me to bring me around
I think Sue is hurting herself more at this point, and someone whether they are admitting it or not is realizing they are being involved in something that is going to far; At this point I wonder what this individual was being told or let to believe and now finding themselves caught in something they don't want to be involved with and it's also telling me that Sue was more of a bully than we knew of.
What's sad is that it's basically just my husband and I and we're seeing Sue enlist others to "enlighten me".
You're right I should have had a backbone, but I also made the mistake of making the assumption Sue would have understood or the least bit...be angry that we did the cancellation but drop the matter, mumble angry words about us, but moved on and just went on with her life.
The uninvite was uncalled for, but no one deserves to have to go through this and I hope no one ever does.
Should I not have been pressured initially and have a "backbone"..yes I should have, but does it justify what Sue does...no it doesn't.
She blindsided me with this iand initially and unfortunately I didn't have a backbone at the time, but I also had assume I was dealing with a socialized human being...not someone who would reach the point I now worry they may decide to just "show up" this weekend.
However from what we are gathering and from the fact it's been an unbelievable two days and she, this Joan and now today another, can't let it go...I really haven't lost any friends.
I think I was involved in people who were planning more than they revealed they were planning...we notice in Sue's email to us...it appears that now the husband may not have come with Joan (they can't seem to make up his mind if he would or not), and that this might have been a lot more worse than a social faux paus.
I think they got caught and now were trying to find a way to get out of it...its funny that despite everything...no one would stop and think of what initially would have helped the situation and yet email after email has tried to not only justify Joan coming but force me to get to know Joan.
It has taught me to be even more careful whom I associate with, since appearances are deceiving and it's also taught me that there are people who lack the etiquette,understanding and social skills to understand that their entire world is not invited as well..
In the meantime, we have a weekend that we are hoping and praying will be quiet and uneventful and are now having to "keep our guards up so to speak"....why? because one person is taking an etiquette faux paus to the extreme and might have possible caused physical problems had this party continued...
Will I ever forget this?? No..has this made us skittish...OH YES!