When threads get locked....

[Mrs. Eclipse]

If it's really bugging you, you can't tell why it was locked, is it ok to message the mod and ask?

I always worry that I bug people...

[Clara Bow]

I can't see why a polite request in a PM would be a problem, as long as you're prepared to either not get an answer or get a beandip. Our mods are some of the least gossipy-dishy I've seen.....

[ydpubs]

The main reason I would want to know is if it really is not clear to me why the thread was locked/deleted, because I really do not want to inadvertently create a thread or post on a problem subject.

[snowball's chance]

The main reason I would want to know is if it really is not clear to me why the thread was locked/deleted, because I really do not want to inadvertently create a thread or post on a problem subject.

If I have a question about why a thread was locked, I PM an EHellion or two whose opinions I trust & have been on the board longer than me, and I have received PMs from OPs asking for my opinion re: the appropriateness of the thread.

Sometimes an OP can start a thread where the OP is fine, but it veers off into something contentious, so it gets locked.

Some of the thread topics that are likely to get locked IME b/c they veer into contentious territory:

reproductive choices (the Duggars, Octuplet Mom)
Should guests where shoes on or off in the house?
breast-feeding
Shopping carts: return to cart corral in the parking lot, or leave next to your parking space?
Serve or not serve alcohol &/or meat at parties/events
Strollers on buses
cigarette smoking
school supplies
I can't think of anymore off the top of my head. 

Political posts praising/denigrating any political figure or policy are not allowed.  Posts about scrabble etiquette/tips/techniques/practices aren't allowed, it doesn't matter if you are referring to one-game Scrabble partner or your spouse.

[kingsrings]

Here is an additional new contentious topic – the etiquette of dialing wrong numbers, how to handle, and whether it is okay to call back hang-up numbers on one’s phone.

Buying snacks from the concession stand in movie theaters vs. bringing your own in.

[ydpubs]

The main reason I would want to know is if it really is not clear to me why the thread was locked/deleted, because I really do not want to inadvertently create a thread or post on a problem subject.

If I have a question about why a thread was locked, I PM an EHellion or two whose opinions I trust & have been on the board longer than me, and I have received PMs from OPs asking for my opinion re: the appropriateness of the thread.

Sometimes an OP can start a thread where the OP is fine, but it veers off into something contentious, so it gets locked.

Some of the thread topics that are likely to get locked IME b/c they veer into contentious territory:

reproductive choices (the Duggars, Octuplet Mom)
Should guests where shoes on or off in the house?
breast-feeding
Shopping carts: return to cart corral in the parking lot, or leave next to your parking space?
Serve or not serve alcohol &/or meat at parties/events
Strollers on buses
cigarette smoking
school supplies
I can't think of anymore off the top of my head. 

Political posts praising/denigrating any political figure or policy are not allowed.  Posts about scrabble etiquette/tips/techniques/practices aren't allowed, it doesn't matter if you are referring to one-game Scrabble partner or your spouse.

Thank you mm250. Yes, some of those topics I have seen implode. I usually just run like the wind when they do come up (especially tipping, yikes!)

I try not to bug the mods, because on this busy forum they have enough to do. I will try PM if there is a thread that is locked and I truly do not know why and my only wish is to avoid adding to or starting more issues.

[Team HoundMom]

The main reason I would want to know is if it really is not clear to me why the thread was locked/deleted, because I really do not want to inadvertently create a thread or post on a problem subject.

Some of the thread topics that are likely to get locked IME b/c they veer into contentious territory:
school supplies

What could be contentious about "school supplies"?
(Or is that code for something, like "scrabble"?   )

[snowball's chance]

What could be contentious about "school supplies"?

SInce I joined the forum, each end of summer a thread started about whether teachers had the right to dictate supply brands (CRAYOLA crayons vs. Wal-mart, PUFFS tissues) on school supplies lists.  This delved into people posting their opinions about education funding, property taxes, reproductive choices, welfare, public schools, & other hot-button issues.

[cbcb]

I'm surprised about the shoes off or on - Being from the north, I'd say I can see that there's no "right answer" but that it probably just very much depends on the weather/seasonality of where you live!

[Team HoundMom]

What could be contentious about "school supplies"?

SInce I joined the forum, each end of summer a thread started about whether teachers had the right to dictate supply brands (CRAYOLA crayons vs. Wal-mart, PUFFS tissues) on school supplies lists.  This delved into people posting their opinions about education funding, property taxes, reproductive choices, welfare, public schools, & other hot-button issues.

Ohhhhh. That makes sense. Thanks!

[snowball's chance]

I'm surprised about the shoes off or on - Being from the north, I'd say I can see that there's no "right answer" but that it probably just very much depends on the weather/seasonality of where you live!

It's one of those topics where many people firmly believe one way or the other, and assume (through my observation) that others feel the way they do.  Some feel it's rude to ask guests to take off shoes, some don't.

"OF COURSE no one wants to take off their shoes at someone else's house!", will get reply upon reply of people who don't mind at all, & prefer it b/c they hate shoes.

"It snows six months a year here, of course, you'd never wear shoes/boots inside" - someone will reply & say they live at North Pole & would never make their guests take their shoes off.

[cbcb]

That's so funny - I can see having a preference in your place, but not the passionate defense of that preference as being correct, etiquette-wise!

[Animala]

You should do a search.  There are a few camps-


~The guest should be able to do what the guest chooses (on or off)
~The host should be able to dictate that the shoes stay on because- feet are dirty, feet stink, feet are ugly, etc
~The host should be able to dictate that the shoes come off because- it will mess up the carpet, hard wood floor, track  in germs/dirt, etc.

I think those are the main ones.  Shopping carts and eating unpaid for food in the grocery store are fun too.

[kingsrings]

Oh, and let's not forget the hot topic of having coffee on hand to serve to overnight guests.

[clairesmom77]

I love ehell because I'm pretty sure that it's the only place on the planet where school supplies, shoes on/off in the house, and shopping carts are controversial issues.