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I'm not going to remove the post because that would be bad form, but two people have told me there's no cause for concern, so unless anyone comes up with a horror story, I'm going to proceed not to be concerned.
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My daughter came to me today asking for help buttoning her pants after using the bathroom. She's five and started kindergarten this year.
"Of course you can button your pants," I said. "What do you do at school?"
"Mrs. $$$$ buttoned me," she said.
I said, "Mrs $$$$? Who?"
She said, "Mrs. $$$$ took a picture of me today, but I can't tell you why." She whispered, "It's a secret."
Okay, so here's my question:
If I'm 98% sure that this "secret" is that the kindergarteners are taking pictures for Christmas presents for their parents, does that nagging 2% of doubt in me allow me to write a note to the teacher asking why Mrs $$$$ (who is NOT a teacher) was taking photographs of my child and handling her pants?
My daughter was clear with me that this was a "good secret" and that she was not touched (other than was necessary for buttoning pants) and so on. But I still don't like it. It just looks bad.
For what it's worth: I've been on the other side of the equation. WHen I was a parent helper at the preschool, a kid asked me to button his pants for him. But I did it in the middle of the classroom, talking the whole time about how I was buttoning it, and I also didn't say anything was a secret.
I don't want to brand myself a lunatic this early in my daughter's school career, but I figure that will happen eventually anyhow. My question is--should I write the teacher and ask for clarification? Or should I just go with my gut instinct that probably everything is okay and my daughter was just wandering around with her pants unbuttoned, and the photographer taking pictures for a project happened to notice before taking her picture?
This is what I'd say:
Dear Mrs. Teacher:
Last night, LittleTabris2 was chattering with me about school, and she came up with a mixture of comments that I found disturbing, so I wanted to run them by you.
She said that Mrs. $$$$ had been in the classroom; that she took a picture of Caroline and asked her to keep it a secret; and she also said that Mrs. $$$$ had fastened up her pants.
I am mildly concerned that someone handled my daughter's clothing, photographed her, and asked her to keep it secret from her mother. I understand, however, that it was most likely some kind of class project as a gift, since LittleTabris1 brought home something of that nature.
I just wanted to run it by you so that if Mrs. $$$$ was not authorized to be taking pictures of my daughter and telling her to keep it secret, that you would know it had happened.
I will continue to work with LittleTabris2 about properly dressing herself after using the toilet.
Thank you so much. I appreciate your time.