Last November I threw a birthday party for my boyfriend. We've been together on and off for 8 years. We are both in our very late 30's. We had the party at the home of some very dear friends of ours, and the guest list was fairly fluid. No one was invited that my BF didn't like, of course, but the upstairs neighbors are sort-of friends so they showed up.
During the party, I was talking with a small group that included both my BF and the female half of the couple (I'll call her Bernadette), as well as a few other people. Completely unrelated to anything being discussed anywhere in the room, Bernadette looked at me and asked "So, when are you two going to have children?" This is something that NO ONE has ever asked me before. I know, I've been lucky. But I was completely blindsided. I think I gaped at her for a few moments, then I turned and walked out of the room. I just couldn't think of anything at all to say or do. I avoided her for the rest of the party and no one else brought it up. Later, I asked someone about it and they said "Well, Bernadette can be like that. Just ignore it." I've been to gatherings that included her since and she's always behaved herself so I thought she'd gotten the message. Until last night.
Another get together. The group of us were sitting in the backyard grouped around two tables. The way the tables were set up, I would have my back to one table or the other. After eating, I turned my chair a bit so that I could talk with the group at the other table, where Bernadette was sitting. As soon as I did she asked "When are you two getting married?"
My BF and I are not engaged. We have not even discussed marriage except in the broadest terms, and we certainly have not discussed it with other people. Once again, I turned my back to her and re-engaged in the discussion with the other table.
What I did was probably rude, but when she does this I really do not know what to say. I know all of the classic phrases, but they fly right out of my head in the heat of the moment and I am completely empty headed. And while if I'd known she was like this at the beginning I might have anticipated the children question (as she has a child and is very pro-children), the marriage question took me by surprise because she lives with the father of her child but is not married herself, apparently by her own choice. So it's not her own world view she's encouraging.
I'm sure something like this will happen again, but I can't imagine what else there is to ask.
I guess what I'm asking is if you could help me think of things she might ask next. Perhaps if I treat it like a play I can be prepared so that when I hear my cue I can deliver my memorized lines.