Which is the least of all evils?

[Sterling]

I vote small thoughtful gift.  Ask the BF what kinds of things she likes.
A good list:
Stationary
a very pretty journal
chocolates
a pretty scarf or mittens
bath products or candles
a book, dvd, or cd she may like
gift card to favorite place

Or depending on how long she has dated the guy a pretty frame with a cute photo of him as a child.  (I think its cute and fun.  she'll like the frame and be able to tease the BF on his crooked teeth 

[mumma to KMC]

I say go with a small gift.

I have a story about the first Christmas after getting engaged to dh. DH had to work 2nd shift on Christmas. (Major bummer) However, his parents invited me to their house for the family gathering. (Which was very nice since I couldn't go home that year.) So off I went to gift opening at their house. My mil gave me a bar of soap. Nice soap that you would buy at a fufuy sort of a gift shop. I still have it somewhere, as I would never part with it, not after what she said when I opened it.

MIL: When my dad was in the hospital, dying, my sisters and I went out shopping to get away for a few minutes. We went to this little shop in XYZ (Ritzy Detroit Suburb.) and I saw this and thought of you.

Me: Thank you, Mrs. F. (Inside I was thinking, uh, when your father died you didn't know I existed and well your ds and I weren't even thinking of dating.)

I think it is in my sock drawer and every once in a while I pull it out and have a good laugh with my dh over it.

[liz5037]

Just thought I'd let you know how it turned out.  "Boyfriend" finally replied to his e-mail (a whole separate problem) and wrote:

"I told New Girlfriend not to worry about gifts for you guys, cause I told her you weren't, so don't get her anything or I'll be a liar.  She is just bringing a bottle of wine for dinner.  I'm bringing my gift for her to the party cause I won't see her after that, so she has something to open anyway.  Girls worry about the wierdest things."

So it has been decreed, so it shall be done.  We thought of something good too: Worst Case Scenario Survival Handbook (Holiday Edition) 

Thanks for all your suggestions!