Author Topic: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)  (Read 609221 times)

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ladyknight1

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As most of you know, it take a while for a public or private institution to send records to another. We now have an electronic system, but it takes a minimum of 3 business days, since the item goes to a server in another state from the sending institution, then is sent to the receiving institution. I keep getting emails about the process and am asked if I can "speed it up". How?

Then I am sent an email with an embedded image that is supposed proof of the initial record being sent. Only it has someone else's name!

alkira6

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Museums need to be very careful because you never know what people will try to do.

Because they're not heavily visited, the period rooms are always a problem.  An amorous couple was found attempting to play 'Scrabble' in a 17th century bed. 

Heck, a janitor found a pair of museum visitors trying the same thing when he went into a closet for a mop. 

Museum guards probably have reams of stories to tell. 

   

Janitors of any ilk often have many such stories.  When I was a new teacher, the janitor in our building often caught kids in the bathroom playing scrabble of many varieties.  When I was a museum docent during undergrad, I learned to never leave the back gallery unattended during high school field trips for the exact same reason.

My son came home one day from 8th grade and said that a couple people he knew were suspended for playing scrabble and partaking in a certain "medicinal in states we don't live in" herb.  I'm not sure if it makes us bad parents but the first thought my wife and I had was doing that at the same time in a school bathroom involves a degree of multi-tasking and iniative that is impressive if misguided.

This made me laugh  ;D  I'm just wondering - why do it at school?  Unless you're super-humanly fast (which I hope not!), you're not going to get all that done in between classes - so you're skipping at least one class to, err, enjoy yourselves anyway.  And since you're skipping class, wouldn't you take the time to try to find somewhere a bit farther from school to do your business?

You would be surprised at the amount of kids I have caught skipping in the bathroom, smoking and otherwise engaged, because they decided to skip at the last minute and no one would ever think to look in the bathroom for skippers.

pierrotlunaire0

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Why else would there be such a massive government coverup of the alleged event?  ::)
I work for the state government.  When I hear people refer to a "massive government cover-up" or a multi-agency conspiracy, I laugh.  Bureaucracy is inefficient, uncoordinated, and each agency hoards information since information is power.

I'm not saying government conspiracies don't exist; Just that they are uncommon.  Usually things get swept under the rug out of sheer laziness, not nefarious reasons.

Considering what I have seen in my 15 years in state government, I sincerely doubt that the government conspiracies even exist.  There is too much laziness, guesswork, poor decisions, and general loose lips for me to be anything but the cynical cuss I am today.

Last month, we went on line with a nation wide database that tracks car titles issued in the US.  That way, when someone presents us with a title from another state, we can check and know for certain that the title in front of us is the true title.

Except, the guy last week had a title issued in 2011, but the database said that the most recent title was issued in 2005.  I ended up making several phone calls to this other state, and confirmed that the 2011 record had not been updated, but it was the most recent title.

Only now, other state is sending ME (lil' ol' peon Me) car title information, and telling me to access the national database and make these changes.  Um, no.  Just no.  I am not the contact person for my state, and I do not have the authority to do anything remotely like this.  I only got them to stop by having the head honchos in my state call other state directly and say, "Leave lil' Pierrot alone!  She's a nobody!"
I have enough lithium in my medicine cabinet to power three cars across a sizeable desert.  Which makes me officially...Three Cars Crazy

Slartibartfast

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Considering what I have seen in my 15 years in state government, I sincerely doubt that the government conspiracies even exist.  There is too much laziness, guesswork, poor decisions, and general loose lips for me to be anything but the cynical cuss I am today.

Oh, they definitely do happen - witness the news about the NSA collecting Americans' phone records en masse and how other agencies now want access to that database.  Obviously that particular situation has been going on for a while (no one will say how long), but it sounds like knowledge about it was restricted to the NSA.

Now, I'll definitely grant you that *most* conspiracies that people worry about aren't happening - we didn't fake the moon landing, we're not implanting mind-control drugs in corn flakes, etc.  But I think it's a bit naive to say that no conspiracies exist, given that we have big scandal exposés probably about once a year  :-\

pierrotlunaire0

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Yeah, that's true, but I just see so much that is contraindicative of true conspiracy planning.  My cynicism makes me roll my eyes so much it is a wonder I can see.
I have enough lithium in my medicine cabinet to power three cars across a sizeable desert.  Which makes me officially...Three Cars Crazy

asb8

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Considering what I have seen in my 15 years in state government, I sincerely doubt that the government conspiracies even exist.  There is too much laziness, guesswork, poor decisions, and general loose lips for me to be anything but the cynical cuss I am today.

Oh, they definitely do happen - witness the news about the NSA collecting Americans' phone records en masse and how other agencies now want access to that database.  Obviously that particular situation has been going on for a while (no one will say how long), but it sounds like knowledge about it was restricted to the NSA.

Now, I'll definitely grant you that *most* conspiracies that people worry about aren't happening - we didn't fake the moon landing, we're not implanting mind-control drugs in corn flakes, etc.  But I think it's a bit naive to say that no conspiracies exist, given that we have big scandal exposés probably about once a year   :-\

To me that is more a demonstration that the government can try to keep a secret but doesn't seem to be very good at it. Especially in this digital, everybody-is-connected internet age.

blue2000

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Considering what I have seen in my 15 years in state government, I sincerely doubt that the government conspiracies even exist.  There is too much laziness, guesswork, poor decisions, and general loose lips for me to be anything but the cynical cuss I am today.

Oh, they definitely do happen - witness the news about the NSA collecting Americans' phone records en masse and how other agencies now want access to that database.  Obviously that particular situation has been going on for a while (no one will say how long), but it sounds like knowledge about it was restricted to the NSA.

Now, I'll definitely grant you that *most* conspiracies that people worry about aren't happening - we didn't fake the moon landing, we're not implanting mind-control drugs in corn flakes, etc.  But I think it's a bit naive to say that no conspiracies exist, given that we have big scandal exposés probably about once a year   :-\

To me that is more a demonstration that the government can try to keep a secret but doesn't seem to be very good at it. Especially in this digital, everybody-is-connected internet age.

There are secrets that government and public officials have kept for long periods of time before being suspected/found out. But it is generally secrets that very few people know anything about. As soon as people know enough to ask questions, you've lost control of your info.

I do agree with you about the digital age. It is really hard to shut someone up or deal with the fallout when they are tweeting to the entire internet (much to the chagrin of officials who have outed themselves). ;D
You are only young once. After that you have to think up some other excuse.

darling

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Considering what I have seen in my 15 years in state government, I sincerely doubt that the government conspiracies even exist.  There is too much laziness, guesswork, poor decisions, and general loose lips for me to be anything but the cynical cuss I am today.

Oh, they definitely do happen - witness the news about the NSA collecting Americans' phone records en masse and how other agencies now want access to that database.  Obviously that particular situation has been going on for a while (no one will say how long), but it sounds like knowledge about it was restricted to the NSA.

I heard 7 years, from a website that I trust (a.k.a, not a conspiracy theorist site).

LazyDaisy

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There are too many opposing groups just watching and waiting and spying on each other for any little detail so they can point fingers. I feel like people (or at least our media) can play quite dumb sometimes when in reality they knew all along. Senator Russ Feingold (D-Wis.) gave a speech in 2001 warning about the likelihood of this very NSA scandal when he was the only Senator to vote against the Patriot Act. His 2001 speech can be found online.

But wait...didn't the FBI collect extensive personal information about US Citizens under J Edgar Hoover... and what about the "investigations" of Sen. McCarthy? Just substitute "communist" for "terrorist" and we're back in the 50s. Somehow we all forget that the government has been spying on its own people for...ever. But we're shocked every time it happens again.
"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools." — Douglas Adams

gingerzing

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Impossible request  from my consumer feedback. 

Quote
i won a bag of charcoal didgital coupon for GroceryStore. and i looked in my GroceryStore account and its not there? my GroceryStore account # is ...
(not including name of store or account number, but the rest is how it came in)

Amusingly enough, I work for a commodity farmer's group.  Have nothing - or at least very little - to do with said grocery store.  And have nothing to do with charcoal or coupons for the store or the charcoal. 

Yes, I did email them back.  I basically told them to use the GroceryStore's contact us link (yes, sent them it) and let them know we did not have their accounts in our system.  Oddly, I didn't hear anything back, though that may be just as well because I have occasionally had people INSIST that I DO have similar information.  Sort of like when people call a wrong number and then insist that you are wrong, they dialed correctly.   ::)


amylouky

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Yeah, that's true, but I just see so much that is contraindicative of true conspiracy planning.  My cynicism makes me roll my eyes so much it is a wonder I can see.

Ahh, but maybe this perceived incompetence is part of the conspiracy?? We'll make them THINK we don't know what we're doing so they won't believe we're capable of what we're doing..

 ;)  (just kidding, not a conspiracy theorist although I know a few..)

VorFemme

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Impossible request  from my consumer feedback. 

Quote
i won a bag of charcoal didgital coupon for GroceryStore. and i looked in my GroceryStore account and its not there? my GroceryStore account # is ...
(not including name of store or account number, but the rest is how it came in)

Amusingly enough, I work for a commodity farmer's group.  Have nothing - or at least very little - to do with said grocery store.  And have nothing to do with charcoal or coupons for the store or the charcoal. 

Yes, I did email them back.  I basically told them to use the GroceryStore's contact us link (yes, sent them it) and let them know we did not have their accounts in our system.  Oddly, I didn't hear anything back, though that may be just as well because I have occasionally had people INSIST that I DO have similar information.  Sort of like when people call a wrong number and then insist that you are wrong, they dialed correctly.   ::)



The ONLY times that worked for me when I got a request for information on their claim (auto insurance company - I worked the internet desk) was when either their last name, their first name, or the combination was so unusual that it was going to be very unlikely that there was more than one person with a recent accident in the 13 states handled by the regional office that I worked at.

And the woman from Cambodia turned out to have turned in the accident in the wrong state - so the email and her claim had to be transferred to another adjuster in the next regional office over.  Think North Carolina instead of South Carolina and a rural road in the mountains somewhere close to a state line.....or Kentucky and Tennessee...locals knew where they were (in which state) - people who were going to college in the area might not have any idea beyond "USA".

Or a really oddly spelled (Polish?) name in an area not known for many Polish immigrants in the last hundred years - turned out that she was a lawyer's secretary, but her parents and three brothers had policies with the company - the person who was seeing her boss also had a policy with our company, but the name was NOT given in the email.  Nor was the claim number...or the policy number....or any searchable data. 

I did get a phone call from her the next work day with that information - and asked that they have the person in the accident set them up with permission.....then sent the contact information for the lawyer to the adjuster on the file.  Just in case it was needed.....I remember nothing else about the claim - only that she worked for the lawyer......
Let sleeping dragons be.......morning breath......need I say more?

LazyDaisy

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I took a call from a customer at my previous employer who stated she had just placed on order through our website and she needed to make a change. I politely let her know we didn't have an online order system...at all...and I'm so sorry but she couldn't have placed her order with us online. I did search her name in our database just in case she could have possibly faxed or emailed us an order (a big stretch but I was trying to give good customer service). She kept insisting that we did have online ordering and she had just used it...back and forth back and forth several times. She finally demanded that I tell her who had she ordered from then.  ???  I told her I had no way of knowing that information and suggested she should go through her browser history, or check for an email order confirmation, or call her credit card company to see if she could track down the company name. I think what happened is that she Googled our company name and then clicked on the first link at the top of the search screen --where the paid "Ads related to Printing Company" were listed -- without looking to see if it was really our web address. Even though she wasn't really nice about it, I felt bad for her because she was panicked about having submitted her credit card number.

I also had a customer insist I was not in California -- he KNEW my company was located in Virginia and so he wanted to pick up his order rather than pay for shipping (admittedly, it was very expensive due to the weight of 2,000 notepads). If he really wanted to pick them up I would totally let him -- the money goes to UPS not my pocket -- and we had customers who really would come to our location to pick them up. Usually they were from someplace closer like Nevada or Arizona, and they were going to be in the area for business. He just kept insisting that I was not in California. I don't know what he was thinking -- I'm so lost I don't know what state I live and work in? I think I would remember commuting approximately 2,600 miles to get to work.
"A common mistake that people make when trying to design something completely foolproof is to underestimate the ingenuity of complete fools." — Douglas Adams

ti_ax

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I took a call from a customer at my previous employer who stated she had just placed on order through our website and she needed to make a change. I politely let her know we didn't have an online order system...at all...and I'm so sorry but she couldn't have placed her order with us online. I did search her name in our database just in case she could have possibly faxed or emailed us an order (a big stretch but I was trying to give good customer service). She kept insisting that we did have online ordering and she had just used it...back and forth back and forth several times. She finally demanded that I tell her who had she ordered from then.  ???  I told her I had no way of knowing that information and suggested she should go through her browser history, or check for an email order confirmation, or call her credit card company to see if she could track down the company name. I think what happened is that she Googled our company name and then clicked on the first link at the top of the search screen --where the paid "Ads related to Printing Company" were listed -- without looking to see if it was really our web address. Even though she wasn't really nice about it, I felt bad for her because she was panicked about having submitted her credit card number.

I also had a customer insist I was not in California -- he KNEW my company was located in Virginia and so he wanted to pick up his order rather than pay for shipping (admittedly, it was very expensive due to the weight of 2,000 notepads). If he really wanted to pick them up I would totally let him -- the money goes to UPS not my pocket -- and we had customers who really would come to our location to pick them up. Usually they were from someplace closer like Nevada or Arizona, and they were going to be in the area for business. He just kept insisting that I was not in California. I don't know what he was thinking -- I'm so lost I don't know what state I live and work in? I think I would remember commuting approximately 2,600 miles to get to work.
Naughty Ti_ax would reply: "Wow, thanks for telling me that, Customer! These California taxes have been killing me for years!"

artk2002

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Considering what I have seen in my 15 years in state government, I sincerely doubt that the government conspiracies even exist.  There is too much laziness, guesswork, poor decisions, and general loose lips for me to be anything but the cynical cuss I am today.

Oh, they definitely do happen - witness the news about the NSA collecting Americans' phone records en masse and how other agencies now want access to that database.  Obviously that particular situation has been going on for a while (no one will say how long), but it sounds like knowledge about it was restricted to the NSA.

Now, I'll definitely grant you that *most* conspiracies that people worry about aren't happening - we didn't fake the moon landing, we're not implanting mind-control drugs in corn flakes, etc.  But I think it's a bit naive to say that no conspiracies exist, given that we have big scandal exposés probably about once a year   :-\

To me that is more a demonstration that the government can try to keep a secret but doesn't seem to be very good at it. Especially in this digital, everybody-is-connected internet age.

There are secrets that government and public officials have kept for long periods of time before being suspected/found out. But it is generally secrets that very few people know anything about. As soon as people know enough to ask questions, you've lost control of your info.

I do agree with you about the digital age. It is really hard to shut someone up or deal with the fallout when they are tweeting to the entire internet (much to the chagrin of officials who have outed themselves). ;D

The problem with most of the big conspiracy theories out there (911-tuthers and the others with the "truth" about recent tragedies) is that they would require the cooperation of hundreds, if not thousands, of people. Man of whom would have no particular motivation to conceal the conspiracy and plenty of motivation to expose it. My favorites are the alt-med people who are insisting that the entire evidence-based medical establishment are conspiring to hide tremendous, earth-shattering truths. Truth be told, it's nearly impossible to get three doctors to agree on a difficult diagnosis, much less keep some major secret. Or that the moon landings were faked. The sheer number of people who worked on the space program through the 60s is staggering -- and someone expects us to believe that they all kept this big secret?

It is possible for the government to keep a secret, but the more people who know it, the greater the risk it will be revealed. The NSA stuff got leaked as did the FBI's domestic spying in the 60s. Sustaining a conspiracy with a large number of people for a long time is nearly impossible.
Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bow lines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover. -Mark Twain