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Author Topic: Not Going To Happen 'Cause I'm Not Harry Potter (Impossible Patron Requests)  (Read 1508604 times)

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RegionMom

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I knew two girls that arranged their schedule as much as possible around a soap opera. 

Yes, VCRs were invented, but they did not have one.  No internet yet.  So, they lived their lives around a tv show.  Mid day. 

Their chosen profession?

Teacher!!

I can still almost hear the wails when they realized student teaching meant that they would be gone all. day. long. 

Not sure what happened to them. 

"young students, please pardon the grammar lesson/math class/spelling test today; I have to watch my soap!!"
Fear is temporary...Regret is forever.

MommyPenguin

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I used to put as many of my classes as possible on MWF, because I could handle the 50-minute classes much better than the 1 hr. 15-minute classes.  My attention span just wasn't that long.  :)  I'd have 4 classes in a row on MWF, and maybe 1-2 on TTh.  Soooo much better than the first semester, in which I had 4 classes on TTh.

With the library book, I'm guessing he wanted it put on hold from a different branch so that when it arrived, he could steal it.  We used to have people do that.  Our hold shelves were behind the desk and we didn't have self checkout, though, so when we got the book and asked for the card to check it out, and they said they didn't have it, we'd put it back on the hold shelf and tell them, "Oh, okay, we can hold it for a few more days, just come back when you have your card."  *Occasionally* we'd let somebody look at a book in the library, but generally only reference books that you really *could* get all your information from in an hour, not the latest hottest urban fiction that was disappearing rapidly from our system.
Emily is 10 years old!  1/07
Jenny is 8 years old!  10/08
Charlotte is 7 years old!  8/10
Megan is 4 years old!  10/12
Lydia is 2 years old!  12/14
Baby Charlie expected 9/17

gingerzing

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Dear Patron,

You can stand in front of me and stare at me as long as you want, but unless you have a library card you are not getting the book. 

Nor will I put the book on hold for you nor will I request another library to send it here.

My guess, in fact, that you are among the people who are the reason that all ten of OUR copies of said book are marked "missing."

No library card, no book.


If someone is unaware that they need a library card to check out a book, they're probably unaware that they'll be expected to return the book.  :P  I'm kind of wondering if the patron could actually read.

Once at a branch library, I was doing the self check out.  I had a few books and a young girl (about 9YO) came up to me and asked if I would check out her book. 

Me: No, I never looked at that book.  I don't need it. 
Girl: I mean check it out on your card for me.
Me: What? 
Girl (huge sigh with eye roll): I want you to check this book out on your card so I can take it home.
Me: No. That is not going to happen for multiple reasons.  Use your own card or your parent's card. 
Girl (glares at me then huffs off to a woman who possibly was her adult.) 

Yeah, I don't know you from sic 'em.  So not going to happen.  However, I did point you and your grown up out to the librarians to let them know what scam you were trying to run.

Yarnspinner

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More proof that Hades is full and the doomed are walking the earth....

The young lady from my thread on Special Snowflakes, who wanted us to throw out all the "smelly patrons" because "the place smells like a urinal" also had another special request that could not be filled.

She sent one of her posse to find me.  She was seated at the microfilm reader complaining to me that it would not "fix" her photos.

Yeah, she had a torn and stained photo of herself and a baby that she had placed in between the two glass pieces which anchor the microfilm while you are spinning through it.  No amount of punching the various buttons is going to clean, repair and seal the photo, sweetie. 

Outraged that I STILL don't have an elder wand, she stormed upstairs to see if "this microfilm stuff is real."

She stormed back when she found out it was both real and boring.

You can't make this stuff up.

Yarnspinner

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Dear Patron,

You can stand in front of me and stare at me as long as you want, but unless you have a library card you are not getting the book. 

Nor will I put the book on hold for you nor will I request another library to send it here.

My guess, in fact, that you are among the people who are the reason that all ten of OUR copies of said book are marked "missing."

No library card, no book.


If someone is unaware that they need a library card to check out a book, they're probably unaware that they'll be expected to return the book.  :P  I'm kind of wondering if the patron could actually read.

Once at a branch library, I was doing the self check out.  I had a few books and a young girl (about 9YO) came up to me and asked if I would check out her book. 

Me: No, I never looked at that book.  I don't need it. 
Girl: I mean check it out on your card for me.
Me: What? 
Girl (huge sigh with eye roll): I want you to check this book out on your card so I can take it home.
Me: No. That is not going to happen for multiple reasons.  Use your own card or your parent's card. 
Girl (glares at me then huffs off to a woman who possibly was her adult.) 

Yeah, I don't know you from sic 'em.  So not going to happen.  However, I did point you and your grown up out to the librarians to let them know what scam you were trying to run.

Oh brother!  We hear that a lot ourselves!  When the internet was first in business and it was showing pretty websites and graphics instead of the dark blue background with white print....two small children demanded my credit card (well, they called it the Lieberry Credit Card) so they could buy stuff off the net.  Yeah, no, you want to buy stuff, get your Mommy in here with HER credit card.

Thipu1

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I had a similar situation to the 'Can I check this book out on your card?' post.

I was having lunch at a cafe next door to a branch of the public library when a young woman came in and began asking people if they had library cards.  It was during National Library Month and it wasn't unusual, at the time, for students to participate in a drive to encourage library membership.   

When asked, I said that I had a library card.  The young woman breathed a dramatic sigh of relief and started in on a spiel with a machine-gun delivery. 

Oh-thank-God-I-need-a-book-for-an-assignment-that's-due-tomorrow-and-I-don't-have-a-library-card-can-I-borrow-yours?-I-promise-I'll-bring-it-right-back. 

Yeah, honey and I have a bridge for sale at a bargain price.  Go hit up somebody else. I may have a soft heart but I don't have a soft head. 

camlan

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And another library story.

I was a witness to this, standing in line waiting to check out my books. My library's catalog is linked with the library catalogs of all the schools in the city. Patrons at any library can request a book from one of the other libraries, and it will be sent to the requesting library and show two days after you make the request. You can also go to the school and check the book out there.

The person in line in front of me wanted a book that was in the high school library. The public library also had two copies, but both were checked out. It was 6 pm, the high school has been closed for a couple of hours. The person had two options--wait until tomorrow and go and get the book himself, or fill out the request and pick the book up at the library in two days.

He didn't want to accept either of his two options. He wanted that book. NOW! as he repeated yelled.

Then he demanded to know the names and addresses of the two people who had the books checked out. The clerk at the desk refused to give out that information.

The guy was getting angrier and angrier. Seriously, I was beginning to be afraid that he'd try to hurt someone. Then the librarian came out of her office, phone in hand, and informed him that he had 30 seconds to leave the building or she'd call the police. He left.

(The police station is right across the street from the library. They could have been there very, very quickly.)

Nothing is impossible, the word itself says, “I’m possible!” –Audrey Hepburn


andi

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Customer the other day:

Her - I need product A.  I bought one a couple years ago here

Me -  sure, they're right over here. (Walks customer to display) I have these three models, X, Y, Z.

Her - no, I want  model 1

Me - I'm sorry, they don't make model 1 anymore. They made updates to the product over the last year so now they only have X, Y and Z

Her - I want model 1.

Me - yes ma'am, I understand you preferred the original model 1, but unfortunately the company no longer makes model 1. It was discontinued over a year ago and now they only offer models X, Y and Z.  They offer additional features the company thought people would like

Her -  can you order me model 1?  Go check your computer for me

Me - (starting to hate our "don't tell customers no"policy and gritting my teeth). Sure - my computer is over here, I'll see what we have. (Looks up the item). Right now we only have models X, Y or Z available to order.  It shows here in my inventory system that model 1 is in "discontinued" status. It's not available anymore

Her - when will you get more in?

Me - (when pigs fly...). I'm not sure ma'am.

Xandraea

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My name is Jane Doe and I have an appointment at 3:40.

(She's not in our appointment book)

Ok, what doctor were you seeing today?

I don't know. I called and made an appointment yesterday.

Who did you speak to on the phone?

I don't know.

Are you sure your appointment was here?

*SNIP*

This made me laugh, because I was sitting in my dentist's waiting room one day when, over the course of 30 minutes or so, no fewer than 4 people, some with kids, came in for appointments that were not with this dentist.  My dentist is across the hall from another dentist, and across the street from three more, one of whom has the same last name! The receptionist graciously handled all of these people and we were giggling when they weren't there at the confusion.

Yarnspinner

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And another library story.

I was a witness to this, standing in line waiting to check out my books. My library's catalog is linked with the library catalogs of all the schools in the city. Patrons at any library can request a book from one of the other libraries, and it will be sent to the requesting library and show two days after you make the request. You can also go to the school and check the book out there.

The person in line in front of me wanted a book that was in the high school library. The public library also had two copies, but both were checked out. It was 6 pm, the high school has been closed for a couple of hours. The person had two options--wait until tomorrow and go and get the book himself, or fill out the request and pick the book up at the library in two days.

He didn't want to accept either of his two options. He wanted that book. NOW! as he repeated yelled.

Then he demanded to know the names and addresses of the two people who had the books checked out. The clerk at the desk refused to give out that information.

The guy was getting angrier and angrier. Seriously, I was beginning to be afraid that he'd try to hurt someone. Then the librarian came out of her office, phone in hand, and informed him that he had 30 seconds to leave the building or she'd call the police. He left.

(The police station is right across the street from the library. They could have been there very, very quickly.)



WOW!  That was scary!  It really worries me when people cannot or will not get it. 

Something similar happened years ago when "Cherie" was our director.  (We never thought we would see a day when "Cherie" seemed normal.)

A patron came in asking for a book.  It was a very old, very esoteric, very hard to find book.  And it was clearly marked in the library catalog as "missing."

We could not get our copy.  It was gone.  We explained this every way we could to the patron and he was adamant that he wanted the book.  We explained the book was gone.  We even went and looked.  We showed him where it SHOULD have been on the shelf. 

We offered to do an interlibrary loan as we could see that two other libraries had it.  (I really miss that system.  It has been "improved" so much over the years as to be almost worthless now.)  We offered to call a nearby town and have the book put on hold for him so he could go get it. 

THAT was unacceptable.  He wanted OUR copy.  No other copy would do and he was going to tell the director how uncooperative we were.  And he did.  Cherie came downstairs with him.  We SHOWED her the situation.  We explained everything we had done.  And she said  "Get him our copy of the book." 

And left.

He stood there very smugly staring at us waiting for the book. 

He waited a long time because we just went back to what we were doing.  I think my immediate supervisor finally told him to come back the next day.  Then she put a book on interlibrary loan from another library for him.

Do ALL library directors live in LaLa Land?  It seems many professors (which this guy was) do.

Thipu1

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Library Directors and head librarians do often live in La La Land. 

They may have been good librarians at some point but they've been so insulated from front line work that they no longer understand the craziness that happens at the Ref Desk.

  Keeping the patrons happy is their primary goal but it's the duty of their staff to provide that happiness and sometimes it just isn't possible. 

Because the museum wanted to bring in more members of the Hispanic community I was told to subscribe to a Spanish language magazine about archaeology that appealed to a popular audience. If the magazine was good it would have been a reasonable suggestion. 

  Unfortunately, the magazine in question featured articles  about aliens building the pyramids and, in
a 64 page issue,  had four, full color, full page ads for telephone psychics. 

Excuse me, we have a very limited periodical budget and I'm not going to waste  over 100USD a year
 on this tripe.  We were already getting good Spanish language publications from Mexico,  Argentina and Spain.   

You really have to wonder how library directors sometimes think.     
« Last Edit: March 21, 2014, 11:19:13 AM by Thipu1 »

MommyPenguin

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Speaking of the dentists with the same name, I used to go to a dentist's office called, "McCarl, McCarl, McCarl, and McCarl."  It was a father and his three sons, and his daughter was a... dental hygienist?  Receptionist?  Something else involved at the office but without being a dentist, I forget.  It must have been interesting to keep track of who your appointment was with.  :)
Emily is 10 years old!  1/07
Jenny is 8 years old!  10/08
Charlotte is 7 years old!  8/10
Megan is 4 years old!  10/12
Lydia is 2 years old!  12/14
Baby Charlie expected 9/17

Lorelei_Evil

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Library Directors and head librarians do often live in La La Land. 

They may have been good librarians at some point but they've been so insulated from front line work that they no longer understand the craziness that happens at the Ref Desk.

  Keeping the patrons happy is their primary goal but it's the duty of their staff to provide that happiness and sometimes it just isn't possible. 

Because the museum wanted to bring in more members of the Hispanic community I was told to subscribe to a Spanish language magazine about archaeology that appealed to a popular audience. If the magazine was good it would have been a reasonable suggestion. 

  Unfortunately, the magazine in question featured articles  about aliens building the pyramids and, in
a 64 page issue,  had four, full color, full page ads for telephone psychics. 

Excuse me, we have a very limited periodical budget and I'm not going to waste  over 100USD a year
 on this tripe.  We were already getting good Spanish language publications from Mexico,  Argentina and Spain.   

You really have to wonder how library directors sometimes think.     

Is it really to keep people happy, or just to keep patrons quiet and out of the director's hair?   ;)

BabyMama

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Speaking of the dentists with the same name, I used to go to a dentist's office called, "McCarl, McCarl, McCarl, and McCarl."  It was a father and his three sons, and his daughter was a... dental hygienist?  Receptionist?  Something else involved at the office but without being a dentist, I forget.  It must have been interesting to keep track of who your appointment was with.  :)

My grandpa, father, and uncle are all MDs, and my other uncle has a doctorate. It's fun when they're all together and someone recognizes one of them, lol.

Katana_Geldar

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When my Mum was married to my Dad and before my Aunt was married to my Uncle they all had the same name, first and last. My stepfather also had the same name as my uncle.